Chapter 1 July 4 2012
Chapter 1 July 4, 2012
To whoever is reading this,
Your probably wondering why I am writing this and the reason that I am writing this is because I wanna tell my story about how I survived. I wanted to tell my story because I wanted to have other people learn from my mistakes and to help other people get the help that they need if something were to happen to them whether it's going to councilors or going to support groups. I didn't get the help I needed until it was to late and I regret it.
Sometimes I wish I could have gotten the help I needed but I was to stubborn and I didn't like talking to people I didn't know because I thought everyone that I didn't know was going to come and put me into the psychiatric hospital. I mean I have been through a lot of shit, and my parents thought they were protecting me from the real world by keeping me at home. I couldn't even go outside because they wanted me to study all the time. They wanted me to go to the best college and be a doctor or a lawyer or something like that. I was an only child, well not the biological child. All of their children had up and left them as soon as they were old enough because they were so overprotective and overbearing.
Well, here goes nothing. Here is my story and what you should know about me. I am literally shaking right now because I am so scared of telling my story and what people will say and do. I don't want people to make the same mistakes that I did because I almost lost my life when I was seventeen when I had my first child. I managed to graduate high school and after high school took care of my baby girl. I made sure I wasn't overprotective and overbearing like my parents were but I made sure I was protective of her and taught her how to defend herself if she didn't feel comfortable being somewhere.
Well I will write more later because my parents are wanting me to come help with setting up the party. I just want to lay down because I have a headache. Once again I will have to take one of my medicines just to deal with them.
After I put my notebook away that I had started to fill with letters, I put on a nice dress and sandal wedges that made me look a little bit taller, I walked down stairs and with my white as snow hair in a pony tail. My mother, Alicia stood in the kitchen while my dad, Robert, stood in the door way and I watched them. My dad had a peach fuzz on his chin from working so hard as a Walmart manager and a Home Depot manager while my mom was busy as an L.N.A while trying to go to college. Then there is me, Luna Wolf, and my twin sister and brother who had moved away the minute they were old enough. As for me, I was two weeks early while my brother and sister were born on time. They were over protective of me and very overbearing and I hated it so much that they were. I couldn't understand why they were over protective and overbearing. I can't even work and make friends because they might influence me to do things like become pregnant or do drugs and alcohol. All I do is study because they want me to become a nurse or a lawyer or something successful and I hate it so much. I know they love me and that they care about me very much but all I want to do is get out of this house.
My mom interrupted my thoughts by handing me paper plates and plastic forks, and knifes while pushing me outside.
"Put those outside, it's really nice out today. After you do that, I want you to grab the cooler and then grab the ice balloons and put them into the cooler. After that come see your dad and I, we have to go to the grocery store and then your dad wants to get your grandfather from the hospital."
I nodded silently as I dropped the plates and silverware off at the picnic table and grabbed the cooler and drinks along with the ice balloons and then started putting them in with a book on top of the plates so they wouldn't be blown away by the breeze. I sighed and sat down as my dad walked outside and smiled a little. He sat besides me with a drink in his hand while my mom came out and looked around. He gave me a necklace with a cross and an angel on it as I looked at him.
"It's what your grandfather gave me after I met your mother. I was going to pass it down to your brother but he moved out along with your sister. I decided to pass it down to you as an heirloom and then one day you can pass it down to your children. I um also have a business that I haven't told anyone about. I feel like it is going somewhere and it has made me a billion air. Your mother and I put together a will and I put in the money after words so your mother doesn't know about it. Everything will go to you if something were to happen to your mother and I."
With that, he gave me a locket with his picture and my mother's picture in it. He looked up at me as I nodded and tried not to cry. He noticed and hugged me tightly as mom walked over to me and hugged me too. I hugged them tightly as they sat together with me in the middle. Dad looked at me as I looked towards mom and hugged her tightly and she smiled down at me while he took a picture. I sighed as I got up and finished putting everything into the cooler when dad got up. I looked at him as he walked towards the front door and peaked out when he closed the door and opened it after unlocking it. He blocked the door when I saw that it was my uncle. I began to breathe heavily as mom brought me upstairs, hugging me tightly and guided me into my bedroom. I heard yelling and then my dad slamming the door then there was heavy footsteps up the stairs and he hugged me tightly as I cried.
It was hard growing up because my uncle had hurt me whenever he watched me while both of my parents were at work. He would touch me in places that I didn't want to be touched and then that is when he began to play doctor with me but he had me undress when we did it. My dad walked in on us because he had forgotten something and he threw my uncle out and ratted him out for it to the police. He brought me to the hospital where they poked at me and they took pictures of me. Dad waited for me outside the room when my mom came in. I don't remember how old I was but it hurt a lot.
After that, I had to go to court to help put my uncle away but it was weird to see him in an orange jumpsuit. Everyone had treated me differently and that's when it started. Mom and dad being overprotective and over bearing. Growing up, before my parents got married, they had broken up and I lived with dad because he said that mom wasn't feeling to good. When I got older, I found out that she was sleeping with other men and then she tried killing herself by cutting her wrists and almost overdosed shortly after my birthday. She wasn't happy because they were having issues and my dad broke her heart to spare her from hurting her himself. He would get drunk and then lay down on the couch. I would spend countless nights cleaning up after him in case D.C.Y.F decided to make a surprise visit. I would sober him up and made him look presentable and help him make sure that he could remember the night before by saying he had work the night before and would fall asleep on the couch.
Soon enough mom and dad got back together slowly and would go to therapy everyday to try to work on their issues. Whenever they did that I would be working on school work with the home school teacher. After that I would go and clean the house starting with the downstairs bathroom. I sighed and then shook my head trying to distract myself by cleaning the house and listened to music that I had downloaded on my tablet mom had gotten for Christmas the year before. Mom had gotten it for me so I could do some of my school work. I finished doing my house work then went about to finish the last of my school work. After I did that, I walked to the living room and sat down on the couch with a book and began to read some book I had found at Barnes and Nobles online and that is when my tablet buzzed. I took a look at it and saw that my mom needed help with the groceries when she got home and I sighed. She always needed help with something whether it was going to some night out with the girls from work or going out with dad and I got up with a blanket around me. I was allowed to stay home when Dad went out with mom to go pick up my grandfather so I could clean the house and do my homework.
I smiled as I leaned against the door way of my parents room and shook my head as I cleaned their room and made their bed for them so they wouldn't have to it when they got home. They would want to lay down after my grandfather got settled down and took his medicine. I laid down and waited for mom to come home so I could help her with getting food in and making sure that grandpa was in safely. I stared at the wall as I sighed and organized my room when I heard knocking on the front door. I walked down stairs and peaked out when I saw my parents and I helped them inside. I helped my grandfather inside with his bags and got him settled in his room and covered his legs with his blankets while I put away his belongings. He watched me and then smiled as I gave him his medication and his water and then made sure his dentures were in a different cup of water. He laid back and I adjusted his pillows for him to make him more comfortable.
Walking downstairs, I watched as my dad and my mom sat on the couch together watching the T.V and I couldn't help but smile and take a picture of them and they saw me and smiled back at me. I sighed as I sat on the couch and began to indulge in my book again and felt a pair of eyes on me and I looked up to see my dad staring at me and I gave him a small smile. He kissed my mom's cheek and she smiled with a blush spreading across her cheeks and I looked away in jealousy, wishing I could find what they had. I wanted to find true love but that was hard to find these days with some guys wanting to have sex or others having a drug addiction and alcohol problem. I sighed as I began to read my book again.