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Hate Is Heavy, Let It Go

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I am passionate about writing spiritual insights and thought-provoking articles and sharing encouragement with people. Be encouraged!


Relationship Matters

When we are in a difficult situation with a difficult person to deal with, I know this is something challenging to remain patient especially if yourself is not in a good condition like you just got exhausted from work. We do not have control over everything that is happening around us but with the help of our capabilities as humans, we can do something about it. But more than what we can do, it is still the work of the Lord that will prevail.

I hope that even in our very challenging moments we still get to be reminded about our relationships with people, like officemates, family, friends, relatives, classmates, etc. May we choose to consider the relationship over getting mad at people because hate will only turn you into something that you are not. Having hate in your heart can also affect your thinking. When we hate somebody, we might do something evil just to revenge. Avoid being mad or having hate in your heart. You might say that this is easier said than done, but hey! with the help of the grace of God, it is possible.

Things that you can do in a very challenging situation with a difficult person to deal with:

1. Value the relationship with the person you are dealing with

It is important that we value the relationship with people instead of being mad at them because God doesn't want His people to have hate in their hearts and fight each other just to prove something. When we choose to consider the relationship with people, we are obeying God's commandment to love our neighbor. Loving people is not based on the situation we are in, it should be on loving God. When we love God, we love other people too no matter how challenging the situation is and no matter how difficult they are to deal with. Stop hating one another and choose to love each other.

2. Let your emotion subside first

I know how things can be crazy at times and this can really lead us to something that we don't do everything. Our emotions make us feel different every day, so if our actions are based on our emotions, then our actions will be as crazy as our emotions too. We do not want to say something bad to someone we love just because we were mad and want to release the anger. The right way of releasing it is to go somewhere you can be alone first, stay calm, and assess yourself if you should be following your anger or your love for God, and lastly, check your heart if you are about to say something unpleasant to the person even if you are not facing them, talk to God and repent if you have felt a little annoyed. It is okay to feel that way, we're just humans and we were not born perfect. Just ask the Lord for calmness and comfort and bring you back to face the person with peace.

3. Choose calmness and peace

When we are in a challenging situation and facing a difficult person, I know we will never think about choosing calmness and peace in the very first place because our emotions are almost triggered by anger. We can prevent that from happening and that is by asking God for the Holy Spirit so it will work inside of us until ourselves will choose calmness and peace instead of being angry or having hate for the person. This may sound difficult thing to do but I know that God can do amazing things for us. Remember, we always have a choice and that is either, getting stuck with your anger and letting it provoke you from doing evil things or letting yourself be calm and choose peace for your mind, heart, and soul.

Leviticus 19:18
You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the sons of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself; I am the Lord.

Luke 10:27
And he answered, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength, and with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself.”


Let the Grudge Go

When having a bad feeling at your lowest is normal because we are humans. But it shouldn't be habitual because it can lead you to something that is not good. Just because we are humans and we can have different emotions every day doesn't mean we can do certain things based on what we feel. That is why our God is telling us to let go of the anger because He doesn't want us to get used to that kind of action. We should always rely on God so we will be guided and not just do something because we want it and we felt something about it.

Here are things that you can do to let go of your grudges:

1. Acknowledge the problem and identify your feelings

Identify what the grudge is and what is causing you to hold onto it. A grudge can form when a problem is not fully confronted or solved. Clarify your feelings on the situation. What is the emotion behind the hurt? Are you angry, sad, or ashamed? Then, decide if this is something you will work on yourself. While doing these, you can open your bible so you can also be guided by the word of God and will not be lost when thinking about something. You can have your journal too and write down everything that is weighing you down. Our God is willing to listen to us every day.

2. Acceptance.

Consciously choose to release the grudge – with or without an apology. The other person may never come around, and they might have forgotten about the issue or not even realize how you were affected. Even if you do not receive an apology, the other person might be remorseful. Sometimes people are remorseful but struggle to apologize due to pride or shame. In order for us not to have a hard time accepting this, we should always pray about everything. God can hear us even in when we can no longer speak caused of the difficult situation. It is okay to ask God for His grace and the Holy Spirit for us to be enabled in acceptance.

3. Stop dwelling on it.

Once you decide to move on and release the grudge, keep moving forward. Do not spend time thinking about the situation, or repeatedly discuss it with others. If the issue is brought up in conversation, change the subject. Choose to have peace of mind and not go through with the issue over and over again. The more we allow ourselves to be stuck on the issue, the more we push the peace away from us. Ask God for peace and you will be peaceful as you have ever wanted to be.

4. Forgive.

Forgiveness is the intentional decision to give up the right to vengeance, retribution, or negative thoughts toward the “offender” in order to release resentment, bitterness, anger, and other negative emotions. You recognize your hurt and pain and you make the choice to let it go. This process promotes emotional healing and restoration of inner peace—and it may also allow for full reconciliation. Remember God has forgiven our sins, so who are we to not forgive others who wronged us? The more we keep this in mind, no matter how difficult the situation is, we will still be able to forgive others too. God's ways are higher.


Bible Verses

Ephesians 4:26-27
Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil.

Philippians 4:7
And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Isaiah 43:18-19
Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.

John 3:16-17
“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him.

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