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what you made of me

i was full up
against the river banks
everything that happened
filled my brain
my heart was on leave
not waiting for anything
or anybody
i wanted to live
breathe on my own
day to day
the purpose in my thoughts
driven by how i felt
on my own
nothing borrowed
barely remembered
it was me
moving quite easily along
it seemed it never rained
maybe across another pond
or inside my head
but rain is not all darkness
it was more than enough
nothing was stopping me
the banks had to kneel
the rush of the sky
it was too fast to manage
that was the love
the forest wasn’t prepared
neither the meadow
it took a mountain
to make it stop
that was you
the rain
and the mountain
you put the limelight on me
then told me to relax
though the lightening was bright
the thunder was loud
still you rained your love
pushing me forward
over the edge of my life
loud and quiet
all at once
that was you
setting me on fire
softening my skin
reflecting in my eyes
a flood and yet
how could i be cool
not inside all of this
you thought i was
but i wasn’t with you
not before, ever
and you like it now
a man who can’t stop
who breaks down walls
who cries when you’re gone
feeling younger than young
starting all over
with your life pushing me
forward, sideways
above the waterline
beyond the flood plain
am i that one
the one you thought i was
no, i’m this one
the one you made of me

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