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rumbles in pain


Johna G. Chan is a wife and a mom of 2 boys. She is so glad that somehow she's able to make one of her dreams come true... write...


so the moment you're confirmed gone
im entitled to cry my heart out

the moment that im asked to function
im entitled to be dazed and numb

i never thought it would be this painful
i dont think anyone deserves this kind of pain

the pain of performing duties while grieving
the pain of staying strong while swaying

the pain of smiling while crying
the pain of loving while dying

im waiting for this pain to go away
but truth be told, i dont want it to

pain and me have a love hate relationship now
i hate not feeling the pain for it may mean loving you less

moving on may mean forgetting you
moving on may mean someday i will be forgotten too


Mark Tulin from Palm Springs, California on April 12, 2018:

I felt your problem and your effort to deal with it. We still have to move on.

Johna Chan (author) from Manila, Philippines on April 12, 2018:

Thank you :-)

Elijah A Alexander Jr from Washington DC on April 11, 2018:

Encourage your children to look within themselves for their answers also. For people of the Bible Genesis 2:24 teaches we are to leave parental teachings and seek god's direction who, per Luke 17:21, is written the kingdom of heaven within us. Of course, they should also advise you if they have an inner inspiration especially if they are less than 12 years old. In that way you will know why they might not want to obey you.


Johna Chan (author) from Manila, Philippines on April 11, 2018:

Thank you. This will be taken positively. For now though, it is as it is...

Looking within me and within the hearts of my kids helps a lot :)

Elijah A Alexander Jr from Washington DC on April 10, 2018:

Don't misunderstand what I'm saying, I do know the feeling of loosing loved ones but I now have the understanding that the life of those we love continues by way of reincarnation, what we call death is but a changing of our physical garment called body. So, consider the following with objectivity.

Oh, how hurtful it must be to loose a loved one. How is it we human have such limited view of life? Is it we have been misinformed to believe departing this earth via discarnating is to be mourned? Have we not heard there is "the living dead" who bury their dead so are we dead because we are human? What must we do to come back to life and accept discarnatring for what it is?

The answer to that last question is "look within yourself" for the answer lies within is written.


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