Inner Turmoil

So many thoughts run through my head

Wish I could lay it all to rest

So many feelings/emotions left unsaid

Lords knows I am trying my best

But sometimes my best is not good enough

I begin to commit sabotage

Wish I could gather the strength to be tough

My heart on my sleeve; wish I could camouflage

Every ounce of caring I have

Still with a guard up, pray it falls down

Once it drops I'll be glad

My true self not afraid to be shown

Yet further and further I feel like I drown

In my own insecurities; I can't hear a sound

Been beaten and bruised

Don't want to get it confused

Miss out on happiness for a real chance

Watching it pass by at a moment's glance

Those moments come and they go

Don't want to miss out and what should be my favorite show

Praying to just go with the flow

Have my mind at ease

Enjoy some peace

Lord just grant me this please

I'm begging, I'm saying, I'm downright pleading

Lord grant me protection

From crazy accusations

And free me from temptations

Wanting to fly free

Lord grant me the keys

Unlock my vault and show me prosperity

Deliver me to my serenity