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Your World Is Not My World

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Your world is not my world.
... I get more nightmares than I do dreams.
Yes, I don't believe in fairtales either.
I write my pain down on paper, get a few tears rolling and am back to me again. ( the art of tears and ink is actually cools me down... Weird I know).
I don't go to sleep angry, I rarely pray too. I just look up at my ceiling close my eyes for a moment and say amen...
.
Your world is not my world..
.. I probably say "sorry" like a hundred times a day. Even to myself... Weird thing is I dont remember being raised that way.
.. Am afraid of love.. Pretty sure am terrified by the thought, because am a little bit extra most if the times..
.. Am just not easy on the goodbyes and letting go's..
Weird thing is that this is all in my head but the thought of it just stings..
.
Your world is not my world.
... The noise kinda keeps me sane, and yes I know you plug it out.
Am not that that fond of the light really, it hurts my eyes... I like it darkish cause that's when everything comes to light.
...
Your world is not my world.
.. I try to find hidden meanings in straight forward statements .
..
Your world is not my world....
... Deep inside I know I want to, I have the words you want to read or hear but I can't pen them down because you wouldn't believe me...
... In my head everything pretty much is normal... But not your normal

© 2021 Amani Utembu

Comments

Harriet Dionela from Taguig City, Philippines on March 11, 2021:

I loved it. Thank you for sharing your article.

Hertha David from Windhoek, Namibia on March 11, 2021:

So many emotions, self-awareness, emotional awareness, thoughts, analysis.. It's beautifully crafted. The tone you used is

Pam Morris from Atlanta Georgia on March 11, 2021:

This is an amazing article with powerful words. It sounds as if you wrote the words from your heart. Love it

BRENDA ARLEDGE from Washington Court House on March 11, 2021:

Amani,

I can feel the struggle in your words.

You want to be the one for her, but fear you cannot do it right.

But maybe you are not that far apart. For when she writes it cools her down also.

Something about the ink puts everything into perspective.

She's afraid of love also & fears letting go so she holds on tight.

She tries to find hidden meanings in your words. She wants to tell you how she feels but knows you don't believe anything she says..not really.

In her mind, she is normal. It is you who seems so different.

Just sayin...

Take care my friend.

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