It’s funny all those years I begged to die
And now that I’m dead,
I’m begging to be alive.
All those emotions, all that pain -
I just wanted it all to go away
And now I feel nothing,
Nothing but emptiness.
I can’t remember the sorrow.
I can’t remember the joy.
But I can remember the stories.
I can remember the decoys,
The fake smiles I smiled every day.
…And though my heart suffered,
Though I was barely alive,
At least I felt something -
Pain - life’s greatest compromise.
I was able to love.
I was able to learn.
I was able to cry and feel my heart burn.
Funny how such discomfort can turn into for what one yearns.
© 2022 Angel