Who Will I Be Today? [A Poem/A Crossdresser's Monologue]

Updated on December 5, 2017
cwkage profile image

Old school poet. Loves rhymes. Loves Comics, Manga and Anime. Terrible at doodles. Fighting Depression, Dysthymia and Anxiety.

Kage Doodles [ Who Will I Be Today? ]
Kage Doodles [ Who Will I Be Today? ]

Who Will I Be Today?

Who will I be today?
I’m asking myself, I don’t need you to speak.
You are a mason, not an artist.
You erect walls and refuse to see what’s outside them.
And for too long have I been the sand in your cement.


Who will I be today?
Maybe the fire in someone’s heart.
Just for a night, and then I shall look for another come the new dusk.
And I don’t care about your fingers pressing holes into the couch,
Or the cassocked collars with sticks and water calling abomination.


Who will I be today?
I want to feel bashful and uncertain,
Like the first teenage experience, where I want the attention with social immunity,
I want to be hunted a little, by the versions of me that you see as natural,
Or maybe I could become them and seek the ones that I see as natural?


Who will I be today?
Maybe the one you gave birth to for the second time,
The one that broke the shackles that you made a second womb out of.
The one with the tongue that slices out the layers coating the words that appease you.
The one that was cultivated in a room within your room that was mean to make me barren.


Who will I be today?
Maybe today, I shall be the way you white sheep automatons intended me to be.
But be not so presumptions as to assume that painting the gate will change the interiors.
I am only doing this to show you I can when I want to. For I didn’t find a place to belong.
I found the world, while you still keep following a clock whose windings have withered to dust.


Who will I be today?
Sometimes the one that sits at home and wonders about those red eyes,
Would they ever return to the blue that I saw when my fist could only hold a finger?
Would they ever tell me that the choices of the heart is greater than the choices of the body?
Or would they ever tell themselves? Would they ever ask me who I want to be today?

© 2017 C W Kage

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    • cwkage profile image
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      C W Kage 6 days ago

      @Louise

      @Mannatita44

      Thank You so much.

    • manatita44 profile image

      manatita44 7 days ago from london

      Yes, nice approach. Sometimes when we get a sublime first line, it carries the whole thing with it. "Who will you be today?" A great piece of poetry.

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      Louise Powles 7 days ago from Norfolk, England

      Beautiful poem. Life has so many questions. We never know where we will be from one day to the next, or who we will be. Thanks for sharing, I enjoyed reading your poem.