Walled In Personal and Public Identities
Heather has a Bachelor's Degree in English from Moravian College and has been freelance writing for more than 13 years.
Wondered if it was normal to go through such turmoil
After a major break-up or the end of any relationship
Starting to develop a sense of an isolated emotional well being
Haven given the perception that things are normal
And on the up and up when everything was anything but
Wondered when this version of a semi new normal
Would come into crystal clear effect and be positively cemented
Tired of moving one step forward and three steps backward
Fed up with feeling like some self conceived failure
For not checking off the right certain boxes and fitting expectations
Will never be Ms. Mary Sunshine; not ingrained in the DNA
Always had a little shade of grey mixed in the landscape
Blended just below the surface and ready to be unleashed
On a moment's notice at the most random of times
Ready to turn on some Dua Lipa or some classic rock to jam to
Sounded like a strange variety of musical choices
Explained a lot of the personality conflict that lied beneath
Ready to learn how to accept one foot in the present and one in the past
When it comes to musical and movie preferences only
Living life locked in past memories, choices and mistakes
A distant memory that gets further and further away
With each passing day that goes by
Learning to forget the former companion that used to come by
Darkened the halls of my private abode and bedroom
Who used to sleep beside me and pretended to be present
Always had one foot out the door when it came to the future
Never had a plan or any form of reliability to speak of
Looking to move forward into a much brighter and clearer light
With, or without, a partner to sleep next to
Unsure if willing to open up the heart to make room for someone else
Burned too many times before when it came to trust
Honesty a good policy and a double edged sword at same time
Praised for being truthful and scorned for having no filter
Educating privately on how to be democratically forthright
Without sacrificing individuality in the process
Ready to finally enter a true and meaningful adult relationship
Thought the last one was the one, but it was just a good start
A sneak preview of the main event
Let's hope the coming attractions will lead to bigger and grander things
Fingers crossed that it will happen sooner rather than later.