Walking on the Borderline, My Eternal Perdition? - LetterPile - Writing and Literature
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Walking on the Borderline, My Eternal Perdition?

Rejected by Death: A wish or a dread? The life I wrecked: will it be accounted for? I walk this fine line in constant rumination.

walking-on-the-borderline-my-eternal-perdition


i had it all
yet chose to lay down my stone
In a betrayal of life
i chose death
and put out the fire
Life didn't leave me
nor was i ever burned!
Clanged many glasses. One day a glass broke
The wine poured out on white cloth
In the shattering was a crucifixion
Christ and the blood were proof
the others did arise.
A Planck moment in time
It was good, the stressless
and the innocence, now my nightmare.
The black oracles came to me
as they should.
We were always one, the same!
Spherical shapes darkly gather
Submersed and cold I'm laid down.
The door has been nailed down.
In that second, my realization:
"there is no bell to ring
and i'm not not saved."
It was the time of the murder
of my soul which was never
mine to let live.
The comfort, the recompense:
let those belong to the others
i left this world not silently
there was collateral damage
and unnecessary talk; evil does come
in a little girl
who played her tricks.
When the dust was cleared
left were misgivings and the damage.
Grace was not to walk by my side
there are ten thousand worlds
and to me they are not for the living
but for the pretenders
and the polite.
i did not find in this world
the life that was mine. Now
pulling for the forgotten bell,
i scream out
and wonder if death will shun me?
Is this to be a borderline, this path--
the road to my eternal perdition?