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Victim to Survivor

victim-to-survivor

A victims nightmare

I am sitting on the kitchen floor

tears streaming down my face.

I don’t think I can take much more

of this god forsaken place.


The pain inside my head so strong

I think it might explode.

Please tell me where I went so wrong

to put me on this nightmare road.


Pills spread out on the table

I just want the pain to stop.

I don’t know if I am able

my brain’s like a spinning top.


As my racing thoughts intensify

is this what a breakdown’s like

all my emotional stressors amplify

is the reaper going to strike?


My abuser walks around my town

not a worry or a care.

While I feel like I am going to drown

with all the guilt and hurt I bear.

victim-to-survivor

A Survivors hope

I can’t keep screaming out in anger

why was I dealt a lousy hand?

From the clutches of that monster

I need to make a stand.


From the self-loathing of a victim

I’ve played that part for years.

now it’s time to sink or swim

and dry up all those tears.


Stop playing at the blame game

when things start to get tough.

No more to live a life of shame

I’ve been a victim long enough.


I am a survivor sounds more positive

than the names inside my head.

To help me write the narrative

of the road that lies ahead.


I know I can’t undo what happened

that left me emotionally scarred

but I don’t have to be disheartened

because survival is not time barred

Comments

Charlie Halliday (author) from Scotland on June 05, 2020:

Thank you for your comments Brenda they are always appreciated

BRENDA ARLEDGE from Washington Court House on June 05, 2020:

Great work.

Your poetry touches upon real feelings.

I love them.

Have a great day.

Charlie Halliday (author) from Scotland on June 05, 2020:

Thank you Ann.

Ann Carr from SW England on June 04, 2020:

Two pictures, one of the pain and hurt, one of the determination to overcome - very well done. A powerful account of what it must be like (thankfully I don't know).

You have a impactive way with words, Charlie.

Ann

Charlie Halliday (author) from Scotland on June 04, 2020:

Thank you John and Lorna.

I was doing a zoom meeting last night and a friend said to me "Get off the cross they need the wood" Which made me think I do tend to go into victim mode and sent me right back to that day on the kitchen floor. This poem was the result.

Lorna Lamon on June 04, 2020:

There is so much emotion and strength in the words of these poems Charlie. The pain and suffering in the first poem and finding the strength to take back control in the second. Inspirational.

John Hansen from Queensland Australia on June 03, 2020:

You captured the emotions and feelings of a victim of abuse so well, Charlie. The second part was full of positivity and overcoming, and I applaud you. A great write.