Hi everyone! My name is MJ and I'm a 19-year-old girl just trying to figure out life like most, if not all, of you.
I was embraced with the comfort of memories we shared as kids, days we shared sitting with the sun kissing our skin full of laughter and innocence. You filled my mind with butterflies, while I filled yours with simple words. I tried so hard to turn those words into a set of wings to match yours, but you were too naive to notice.
You left without leaving any footprints in the sand. I turned around and you were simply gone, leaving me with nothing but those butterflies frantically swirling inside. As I wandered home asking what I did wrong, those winged creatures repeated all the harsh words I must have forgotten he breathed into existence. I stilled missed his presence and attention.
You came back because I asked you too. I wanted you to come back because you missed me and finally longed for butterflies. I accepted the line you drew in the sand when you drug your feet upon your return.
I packed up the memories we shared and moved on knowing you had made the decision for the both of us. Suddenly you let me fill your mind with colorful butterflies and you felt alive, but it was too late. I took all the butterflies you had given me the time before and released them. So now I am the one leaving you with those frantic butterflies while I walk with my toes in the sand and face towards the sun.
"He is more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same." - Emily Bronte
I hope this poem I wrote while going through a heartbreak resonates with some of you. I wrote this after ending a very toxic, on-again-off-again relationship I had during high school. To anyone in a similar situation - leave. It was the hardest and yet most rewarding decision I made. It took me a long time to get over this boy, but looking back on this decision I think taking myself out of this situation was the best thing I did for myself.
That's the thing - I never cared about myself back then. I put everyone else before me and left my own wants and needs on the back burner. Leaving this relationship opened my eyes that I deserve better. I deserve a love that doesn't leave me crying in my pillow each night wondering why I will never be enough. You deserve that too. You deserve a love that makes you feel like the sun shines brighter and life's a little bit better. You deserve the world.
With Tons of Love,
© 2020 MJ