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Blurred Lines

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Just another human trying to make sense of it all, I write my thoughts down so my brain doesn't explode

through-the-fog

Have I learnt anything from the remains of the disturbing memories that haunt me and linger hidden in the ancient corridors of my unconscious mind?

It feels like I’ve been trying for a lifetime to forget nightmares of a past I wished I would never have to look back on. There’s something about this remarkable place, the energy surrounding me brings it all back and I am no longer able to hide my shame.

Everywhere I turn memories of dreadful and magical experiences seep out of the DNA structures of the surroundings in which they took place. There is no escape, its slapping me right in the face. This madness is endless!

Occasionally the thin line between fantasies and reality fades and in that moment I am unable to tell what’s real and what is just a dream. There is no difference anymore.

Constantly envisaging, ideas and solutions stampede my tortured mind however, I will find the time to decipher this train of thought into something useful, just maybe not today. Impatience is my weakness.

Can I block these images out of my mind, put them back in the little black box and hide it away in the depths of my reminiscence? Or will I have to embrace all that has been and all that is for what it is? Is it my karma to relive the pain, regret and grief of a former lifetime?

Have I missed something, an important lesson maybe? I proceed further into the indefinite but I am no longer lost, I am heading in the right direction. For this I am proud, at least I got me this time round.

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