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This Is What Happened When I Ate a Witches Pie

I have been writing poetry, fiction and short stories for many years and have completed a book of poems. I also enjoy comedy writing.

Witch looking for me.

Witch looking for me.

Eating Witch's Pie

I followed her into the forest, she gathered berries and fruits

She was a stumpy mean witch, men say she is a brute

She cast nasty spells on town folks when they disagreed with her

It is said that she once turned the Mayer into a bird

I hid behind a huge tree so she did not see me

I felt sorry her loneliness, but she was wicked really.

The witch had finally finished and headed back to her crooked house

In it she hung chicken foot, dried ducks and she had a little black mouse

She had a large pot brewing and in it she added the berries

It smelled real good i felt a growling in my belly

Then she started a pie mixture with flowers and apples

My mouth began to salivate as I peeped through her windows straining my ankles

Then she strained the water from the boiled berries and added them too

The pie smelled good and looked good too

She popped into her rusty old oven and baked it a while

This time I was like a hungry child

The pie had finished and she placed it on the window sill to cool

That was a bad idea you old fool.

I swiped it and ran to the forest hid and ate

There and then I felt drowsy and slept

I woke up tied to the witches’ bed

She looked at me and made a ridiculous cackle

“Let me go you old hag or you will end up dead” I said.

“Me? You ate a witch’s pie now you are mine to shackle

That pie contains a powerful spell to turn people into pigs

So I can have pork all year without sweating my wig

You ate the first and soon you will be cooked

You deserve what you get you sneaky pie crook.”

I struggled and struggled and broke the tie free

Bolted out the crooked house and myself I nearly peed

I ran deep into the forest and soon I was on all fours

Grunting and snorting just like what a pig does

I knew I was me, but now I was a poor old pig

This will teach me to leave witches pies alone and mined my own business

© 2019 Clive Williams