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The Modern Day Dating Game Show Contestant

Heather has a Bachelor's Degree in English from Moravian College and has been freelance writing for more than 12 years.

When it came to dating, I was an inexperienced novice

Without a clue or the ability to buy a vowel on Wheel of Fortune

Before my boyfriend and I crossed unexpected paths

I never thought I was worthy of a healthy relationship

Las Vegas odd makers even stopped placing bets on me

Considered dating a closed chapter of the story

For several years because no sparks ever produced

By anyone whether accidentally or otherwise

Lost faith in the whole idea of happily ever after

Deemed too practical and cynical for such flights of fancy

Criticized by matchmakers for throwing in the towel too soon

Pressured into others into being paired up with some fresh meat

Treated like the hot new piece of cattle to be trotted out at parties

So that no one will be left coming to the festivities solo

Due to this desperate effort led by the clueless, forced to change

Hard to say if it was for the better or for much worse

Felt like a frightened lamb being led to a social slaughter

A firing squad with a DJ hiding in the midst of some fake strobe lighting

Set up on a few disastrous blind dates generated by friends

That led to nothing but awkwardness and disappointment

Grown men who acted as if they were toddlers playing dress up

Suitors who didn't know how to get from Point A to Point B

Without Rand McNally or GPS guiding their every move

Ready to retire the Little Black dress that was never worn

And the stilettos still in the box due to their discomforting nature

Returned to the worn out white Nikes and the faded blue jeans

Minimal make-up and just relaxed enough to have fun

Good things come to those who never hunt for it

That's how Mr. Wonderful appeared unexpectedly

Started out as a nice friendship that led to some flirting

A few bowling games and one good first kiss

A much needed surprise that made this singleton

Burn their temporary membership card for good.

Not looking to be traditional, because it's overrated

Just searching for adventure, happiness and honesty

Nothing more, nothing less.


A little black dress that was never worn for whatever reason.

A little black dress that was never worn for whatever reason.