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The First Thing

What's the first thing I think about
It's always there,
I don't have to be awake for it to matter
It's not a little river town,
Even though that would not be so bad
It affects me some way... how?
It's not my concern, my mind won't shatter

I can't really tell you what it is I'm thinking
It's not just about me
But only, what it might be, it's living freely
Without me taking you down
I won't ask for anything, it kills me to do it
It's a straight style, no chaser
But that's not true, it's much more than easy

I'm not baking cakes, just trying to survive
I've not felt that way before
I'm not running my life for a politician
Or like a business
It's raw emotion, and I feel the edges
The nerves live life too
I'm vulnerable, the fire is my ammunition

I can't be concerned if someone is distracted
I'll wait and tell you later
I want your attention, leave another man out
But I'm not telling you
It's just a suggestion if you want all of me
Because I'm in it all the way
Give me your mind, I'll tell you what I'm about