The Case of the Missing Keys

Updated on May 29, 2019
Jodah profile image

John values the use of humour and enjoys writing and reading limericks and jokes. He is a fan of Monty Python, Mr Bean, Black Books etc.

The missing keys
The missing keys | Source

The Case of the Missing Keys

My keys have gone missing,

I think they are lost.

Where could they be?

To find them I must.


I’ve looked everywhere

They could possibly be,

Even places they shouldn’t

Like under a tree.


My keys have gone missing,

They’ve just disappeared.

Once before they were stolen,

So that’s a real fear.


I used them this morning,

I took out the bus,

But since I came home

It’s all been a fuss.


My keys have gone missing,

Oh how can this be?

I’m always so careful,

This just isn’t me.


I had to do something

That got me distracted,

And I put the keys down.

My mind is compacted.

Source


My keys have gone missing,

It’s really not fair,

The stress that I’m feeling.

I’m pulling out hair.


My wife says to retrace

Each step that I took.

I’ve done that five times,

More than a good book.


My keys have gone missing,

My head is so sore.

The car and the bus keys,

The house keys and more.


I’ve looked in the kitchen,

Every room in the home,

I checked out my tool shed,

And on the hook near the phone.


My keys are still missing,

I can’t concentrate.

I must find them soon,

The day’s getting late.


I’ve given up searching,

I can’t look anymore.

I’ll just go and shut ...

Oh! ... they’re in the back door.


... how embarrassing ...

I am sure that is the first place I looked ... really, it was ....

Questions & Answers

  • Have you ever tried asking Saint Anthony for assistance when losing something?

    No, I haven't, but thanks for the tip. Maybe next time I lose something I will try praying for his help.

© 2019 John Hansen

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    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      7 weeks ago from Queensland Australia

      PS, it is so good to know we are not alone in these things. I too have a special place for keys but sometimes we get distracted and common sense does not always prevail. Thank you for reading and for the angels.

    • pstraubie48 profile image

      Patricia Scott 

      7 weeks ago from sunny Florida

      O my ----this must resonate with a LARGE audience. I have left my keys in the door and searched high and low for them. The really sad part is that I have a special spot for them which would keep me from losing them and m mind if I used it every time. Clearly I do not---just what I needed to read this evening----thank you for once again sharing your wit and humor. Here's to no more lost keys!!!! Angles are winging their way to you this evening ps

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      7 weeks ago from Queensland Australia

      Hi Li-Jen, I feel you need to see the funny side of every situation, even if it is stressful at the time. Yes, at least I know where to look first next time. I just hope I don’t lose my glasses, then what hope have I got?

    • Li-Jen Hew profile image

      Li-Jen Hew 

      7 weeks ago

      Haha, gaining inspiration from losing keys! Funny title! Glad you found the keys. If you lose them, then you'll know where to find them haha. Thanks for sharing.

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      8 weeks ago from Queensland Australia

      Glad this raised a chuckle, Lawrence, and that you can relate. Wow, how lucky was that you found the phone in the bin while emptying it. Thanks for sharing that.

    • lawrence01 profile image

      Lawrence Hebb 

      8 weeks ago from Hamilton, New Zealand

      John

      This brought a chuckle after a long day, thank you.

      It also reminded me of the time I lost a mobile phone, thankfully not one of the smartphones we have today, but still stressful enough.

      I found it two days later, in a rubbish bin I was emptying in the City CBD!!! (I was working as a street cleaner at the time)

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Hello, Rinita, nice to see you. I admit I was getting quite stressed about the lost keys, but I knew they couldn’t be far away. I just don’t

      Ike losing anything. Glad I was able to capture the frustration.

    • Senoritaa profile image

      Rinita Sen 

      2 months ago

      The repeating of the phrase - my keys have gone missing - certainly sets the urgent mood behind the poem. You are truly gifted to be able to make a poetry out of stress. Glad you found your keys, though. I am sure we've all been there. If not keys, something else.

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Ha Shauna, yes that happened to me once as well. Thanks for reading and relating.

    • bravewarrior profile image

      Shauna L Bowling 

      2 months ago from Central Florida

      We've all been there, John. Have you ever lost your glasses only to discover they're sitting on top of your head?

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks, Marie. No, short mystery story here sorry. Maybe next time.

    • Marie Flint profile image

      Marie Flint 

      2 months ago from Jacksonville, Florida USA

      Cute, humorous.

      At first I thought I'd be reading a short story mystery.

      You kept the meter and rhyme. Nice.

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Haha, Alyssa. Nice to hear from another who can relate to doing this. I don’t feel so bad. Yes so much for locking the door.

    • Alyssa Nichol profile image

      Alyssa 

      2 months ago from Ohio

      I was on the edge of my seat as I read through, hoping you were going to find your keys! I've done the very same thing.. left them in the door after coming home. So much for the door being locked! haha! Awesome poem!

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Oh, thanks so much for sharing what your mother said Brenda. I am glad she enjoyed this. I always check weird places too, you never know.

    • Brenda Arledge profile image

      BRENDA ARLEDGE 

      2 months ago from Washington Court House

      John,

      My mother enjoyed your poem and the video clip.

      She said to let you know they once misplaced their keys and found them in the stereo.

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Yes, me too! Believe it or not, I did also check the freezer. Nothing would surprise me and I thought I had already looked in all the obvious places. Thanks Flourish.

    • FlourishAnyway profile image

      FlourishAnyway 

      2 months ago from USA

      Not you too! I leave mine in the door and my husband teases me that I’m going soft in the brain. At least they aren’t in the freezer.

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Hey Brenda, yes you got it! it does make you so frustrated when you lose something important like your keys that you are unable to concentrate on anything else. I get like that. So glad you enjoyed the George Carlin video..it was one I had not seen before either. Thank you for giving your mother the link too. i hope she enjoys it.

    • Brenda Arledge profile image

      BRENDA ARLEDGE 

      2 months ago from Washington Court House

      John,

      What a cute poem. It is so true.

      We are always frustrated when this happens and nothing else seems to get accomplished as we cannot stop our minds from searching.

      This happens to my mother and her husband on a weekly basis.

      I so loved your video of George Carlin. One of my favorites, though i had not heard this one before.

      Thanks for the smiles and enlightening my day.

      Oh...i sent a link to my mother also.

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Hi Genna. Losing keys and glasses etc seem to be common occurrences. Haha, it was obviously a good money spinner for you and your sister finding your dad's glasses and keys. I hope you weren't tempted to hide them on him lol. Thanks for reading, glad you enjoyed.

    • Genna East profile image

      Genna East 

      2 months ago from Massachusetts, USA

      I've done that a couple of times, John, only to find them in the front door lock. I remember my father used to lose his at times -- his glasses as well. He used to offer my sister and I a quarter if we could find them. (The absentminded professor.) Loved this fun poem that enables us to laugh at ourselves, while knowing that we're in good company. :-)

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you Heather Ann. Appreciated.

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you my brother Sean, for your constant support and encouragement. So glad you found your puerility though. Blessings.

    • Heatherann05 profile image

      Heather Ann 

      2 months ago

      lol this is cute!

    • Sean Dragon profile image

      Ioannis Arvanitis 

      2 months ago from Greece, Almyros

      That's my rainbow poet! Well done again! Your poem reminds me of the time I thought I had lost my puerility, but finally and fortunately, it was always in my Heart!

      Blessings!

      Sean

      PS: I love George Carlin, he is one of a kind!

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks for visiting MsDora and for the nice comment. I really was getting quite frustrated so it was a relief when I found then, but embarrassing as well. I had no choice but to write a funny poem about it all.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 

      2 months ago from The Caribbean

      John, I can and I'm sure many others too can relate. You made me laugh at myself. Beautiful, playful, truthful lines.

    • Stephen Austen profile image

      S P Austen 

      2 months ago from Qualicum Beach, BC, Canada

      I will - she'll laugh, I hope!

      All the best,

      Steve

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Yes, Linda it was in Dr Seuss style, thank you for noticing that and having a laugh. Glad you can relate to. Blessings.

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Ok Premjit, I will.

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Hi Elijah, I hoped this would give the readers a good laugh, even though it wasn’t funny at the time. It isn’t something I normally do. I more often misplace my glasses lol. Keep laughing.

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Ruby, glad these gave you a laugh, both my poem and the George Carlin video. Thanks.

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Hey Steve, thanks my friend. Tell your wife I feel for her. Cheers.

    • Carb Diva profile image

      Linda Lum 

      2 months ago from Washington State, USA

      John, this was hilarious. Perfect Dr. Seuss style...and boy, can I relate.

    • profile image

      Premjit Sunil Gatigante 

      2 months ago

      Keep going

    • The0NatureBoy profile image

      Elijah A Alexander Jr 

      2 months ago from Washington DC

      So, So, Sssooo funny, John, and that's something man do so often. After living the nomad life, once I got a place to lock up, I have always kept my keys on something and attached to the shorts I am or would be wearing after my bath.

      As the nomad, I often left my knife or some other tool and if I got 50feet away from it I would say "there's something better ahead" and surly as said it would be. I never saw a reason to become stressed.

      Thanks for sharing it, it gave me the laugh of the day and I'm still laughing out loud.

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Richert 

      2 months ago from Southern Illinois

      I'm still laughing, George is so funny. BTW there' s some more good videos contained in the video. I also laughed at your poem. Nothing is more frustrating than loosing something. I enjoyed reading about your key's.

    • Stephen Austen profile image

      S P Austen 

      2 months ago from Qualicum Beach, BC, Canada

      I think we can all relate to this one, John! Especially my wife!

      Best Wishes,

      Steve

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Haha Bill, poor Bev (and you). My wife loses her keys as well but usually when she is out rather than at home. Invariably they are found in her purse, so me leaving them in the back door isn’t so bad. I do think most people could relate to this though.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 

      2 months ago from Olympia, WA

      I am not making this up...Bev loses her keys at least twice a week. It's like a constant scavenger hunt at our house. lol You captured it perfectly, John! Welcome to my life.

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Yes, sure is when you need them most. I'm glad you can relate Clive.

    • clivewilliams profile image

      Clive Williams 

      2 months ago from Jamaica

      i feel the pain...i hate when my keys go missing. and it is always when you need them.

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Yes, John, I think losing one's keys is quite a common occurrence. I am glad you enjoyed this bit of frivolity.

    • John Welford profile image

      John Welford 

      2 months ago from Barlestone, Leicestershire

      I think we've all done something like this at one time or another! I enjoyed this little piece of nonsense!

    • Jodah profile imageAUTHOR

      John Hansen 

      2 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Hey Pamela. This wasn't much fun at the time, but I have to look back and laugh. Glad you enjoyed it too. Cheers.

    • Pamela99 profile image

      Pamela Oglesby 

      2 months ago from Sunny Florida

      This poem was so much fun to read as we probably all relate to doing something just like this. I really liked this very good poem John.

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