The Bumbling Explorer Strikes Gold!

Heather has a Bachelor's Degree in English from Moravian College and has been freelance writing for more than 13 years.

Taking a chance on another type of adventure

One that takes this perpetual lone wolf

Into uncharted territory off the beaten path

On a gravel filled dirt road leading to a rickety bridge

Narrow enough for one person to walk before it crumbles

Cascading into the rushing rapids of the river below

Missing certain death by mere seconds or dumb luck

Found a fellow weary traveler/patron of the art

Of finding the Holy Grail and the lost city of Atlantis

Mr. Rockefeller by day and Charles Lindbergh in his dreams

With a hint of the Getty eccentricities about propriety

A lover of walking around nature and snuggling in 800 count sheets

Another side of the coin who preferred to use his hands

When exploring new objects as well as your body

A friendly shoulder to lean on who sometimes funds flights of fancy

Able to get better equipment, maps and a superb black Fedora

The hat makes the explorer look adventurously stylish

Also, a strong prescription reading glasses does wonders

Beating the Mr. Magoo out of this hapless eccentric without proper vision

Instead of not seeing the pillar before hitting it each time

There's now a 20 second delay that allows enough time to duck

Some of the time; not always observant enough regardless

Unfortunately, much to your Mr.'s disappointment

Dropped the new $300 Gucci reading glasses into some quicksand

Rapidly eaten up by nature and a spat out by an Anaconda afterwards

Dismayed that his money was wasted in a random act of clumsiness

Despite this incident, still eager to travel around the world

Holding hands and cuddling in tight spaces the whole time

Never felt so safe and secure with anyone before

Wondering what comes next in the space time continuum of delight this is

Found out sooner than I expected one weekend night

Intrigued by the prospect of what comes next in this Co-Op partnership

Have been invited to meet my personal CEO's Board of Directors

Basically, members of his family and other various business compadres

Excited and nervous at the same earth shattering time

Eager to develop the ideal self-presentation to showcase the future

Petrified of the possibility of literally hitting a brick wall

Embarrassing myself and my partner in crime in the process

Decided that it was simply best to just be come as you are

With some polish and a lot less four letter words in the vocabulary

Don't want to reveal that the newest potential member

Talked like a truck driver and was about as cultured as Roseanne Barr

Hosting the Whitehouse Correspondents Dinner

Or about as funny as Howie Mandel and Jay Leno doing stand-up

Time to get the hair, nails done and the mouth taped shut

Ready. Set. Go.