Skip to main content

The 2nd Annual Misfits and Lone Wolves Metropolitan Gala

Heather has a Bachelor's Degree in English from Moravian College and has been freelance writing for more than 14 years.

The type of event where black ties and even dates were optional

Rebels and self-described ugly ducklings welcome to join this soiree

Created this shindig with a group of liked minded objectors

Have been keeping up with the Jones since the 1950s

Done following them around like a lost puppy looking for scraps

Fed up with paying thousands of dollars of membership dues

And still feeling like an outsider amongst a circle of familiar faces

Felt like Rodney Dangerfield in the getting no respect department

Even the busboys and wait staff ran from our table in utter disgust

Gave the usual sneer to a group not quite up to high society par

Whether it was though tipping a few hundred short of the next table

Or having a miniscule run in those grocery store purchased knee highs

Eye rolled by the huddled uniformed tribe of the underpaid and overworked

Ultimate irony from someone who generally over tipped everyone

Tried to appease those wealthy matron chaired ladies who lunched too much

On Watercress sandwiches and White Zinfandel three times a week

To talk about the same inane topics in hushed important overtones

A group of empty headed Pez Dispenser meeting to plot suburban supremacy

Those zombies became the crème de la crème of who Access Hollywood deemed

More relevant than those who actually contributed to society beyond catfights

Donated largely to every single one of those charitable groups

They joined to appear more than some plastic Barbie doll trophy wife

Made an effort to be liked by people usually avoided by regular folks

Paid for expensive beyond belief manicures and pedicures

To find out those Real Housewives of wherever ladies weren't hiring

Not itching to add another fox in the henhouse to stir things up

One Botox filled fish lips enough to cause a season's worth of spiteful drama

Sick of being kicked around by those grown up mean girls who never grew up

Held way too many doors for people who slammed them back

When it was their turn to return the favor to someone else

Treated like the Wrigley's spearmint gum their leader just scrapped off

Their designer high top sneakers suddenly all the rage on television

Fought back against those ignorant witches and their black magic ways

Created a new group for black sheep personalities never able to fit anywhere

Loved to wear mismatched socks and off-the-rack clothes from a department store

Listened to 1970s loud rock music; a mixture of punk and risky guitar playing

Ready to hit the ground running with these dysfunctional pretend Playboy bunnies

Planned another bash to honor the bizarre, unique and downright risk-takers

Controversial social media obsessed celebrities need not RSVP

Not in the mood to be part of another name dropping clique at this time

Started to develop a new attitude where kindness came with a partial purpose

To not be overlooked or criticized by others anymore

Those days were long gone; so beware of people bearing gifts.

They at least expect a thank you in return.

Location of success and isolation at the same time.

Location of success and isolation at the same time.