Stop Domestic Abuse - Let the Bruises Show!

Was reading about Tanya Tucker a couple of weeks ago and discovered that when she was with Glen Campbell he was physically abusive and hit her. She said she hit him right back and it got so terrible they had to separate before someone got seriously injured. Lowered my opinion of Campbell a little bit. He's dead now (died Aug. 8, 2017), so I guess it doesn't matter anymore.

Always a mistake to let disagreements get physical. Things tend to happen during the physical fight that no one could have imagined and the next thing life changes forever -- somebody dies, somebody goes to prison, and the kids end up in fostercare. Better not to start down that road in the first place . . .

Posting this on FB & AH.

Blessings, dear friend . . .

Yes,, research and studies know that when things aren't going well, domestic violence increases. With so many people out of work now and scraping to feed their families, it's likely that violence has increased in the home.

It's increased outside the home in some cases too. Why would any sane person carry a gun to the state house to demand lifting of lockdowns? Who are they planning to shoot, and how will that improve the situation if they do shoot someone?

Things are very hard for lots of people right now, especially families with children. I hope this nightmare we're all living will soon be over, but the outlook really isn't good . . .

Hope you are staying safe and well. Blessings dear friend . . .

Posting to AH &N FB.

A year from my previous comment many people are convinced the economy is doing great, but if one looks deeper, it is mainly great for the wealthy, the top 1 percenters. Wages haven't risen in years. Most people need several jobs just to squeak by themselves. If they have a family they are really having a hard time.

Some economists are saying the recession has already begun. I guess time will tell. I know rent is through the roof and here just a one bedreem apartment is $600 or more. An efficiency is about the same, and so many people can't afford it.

Even an elder person receiving what is said to be the average SS payment of $1350.00 a month would have a hard time after rent and utilities. Plus Medicare payments are automatically taken out of one's SS check, which a lot of people probably aren't' aware of if they aren't on Medicare.

Then one must buy a suplimental insurance to cover what Medicare doesn't, and together those 2 things are likely at least $300 a month. That leaves $200 a month for food and other necessities after the rent, utilities, and Medicare costs are taken out of the 'average' SS monthly benefit.

So the economy isn't great for a lot of people right now. Talk to some farmers and see what they have to say.

Domestic abuse of women and children is on the rise, and that doesn't begin to address the abuse of homeless people by people who think if they give a homeless person anything at all that they are suddenly entitled to be verbally and sometimes even physically abusive. Hate crimes and abuse of homeless people is a serious problem and it's not only women and children who are abused in this situation.

It seems to me people are getting ruder and nastier in general the last year or so. I'm thinking the example in the WH is contributing to that. I'd be surprised if domestic abuse weren't more prevalent now for the same reason.

Hope you are well. Blessings and hugs dear friend . . .

It's a known fact that domestic violence increases when the economy gets bad, people lose their jobs and can't meet their obligations, etc. It's just getting started now -- Trump's recession. Business are being effected adversely by the trade wars and some will end up closing down, laying off many workers who may not even be able to get a minimum pay job anywhere. As more and more people lose their jobs there will be less demand for all businesses and they will start laying off workers. Will be interesting to see what the economy is gonna be like a year from now

Sadly, when parent's can't provide for their children and husband's can't meet their family's financial obligations they get frustrated and angry and depressed. Studies have proven long ago that bad economies encourage more domestic violence. Of course violence solves nothing, but people in financial trouble aren't always rational

I already feel sorry for the children who will be disabled, maimed, and killed, because some moron said,"Trade wars are good! They're easy to win!" And then he started some . . .

Be safe and well. Blessings dear friend . . .

Melania has been out of sight for such a long time! Since the 10th of May. A month tomorrow. She was said to have gone to an official event a couple of days ago, but the press wasn't allowed in. The photos they provided where they said she was in them were taken from such a long distance that they could just as well have been photos of me! No way to identify Melania for sure.

Trump is such an abusive you know what that I would not be surprised to discover he black & blued Melania's face byond recognition cuz of his deep frustrations with trying to be a dictator and it's only partially working for the time being.

When violence is indulged it sometimes goes beyond what one intended and people die. I hope that isn't Melania's fate because of her poor judgment in marrying such a creep.

A couple of days ago the headline on a story about Trump on Yahoo News was: "rump issues false claim about Dems, migrant kids . . .

They seem to make a lot of typos, spelling errors and poor grammar in the news stories on Yahoo News lately, but I think "rump" was an apt description. A politically correct way of saying he's an A-hole.

So anyway, I really hope Melania is OK and not the victim of The Rump.

Hope all is well with you. Blessings and hugs dear friend.

So powerfully stated Shyron. It is heart breaking to know that some endure this abuse in silence. When I was the Parenting specialist (funny title...how anyone can specialize in parenting is something I never figured out) a young woman came in the the Parent Center bruised obviously bruised and with lumps on her arms and face. She did not deny what was happening but refused to get out of the situation. Before too many weeks after that the family suddenly moved. So I never knew what happened to her. But it took my breath away to see her. Thank you for giving a voice to the voiceless .....many Angels are headed your way dear lady ps

My mother always said, if he will hit you once, he will hit you again. My daughter's ex was emotionally abusive. I've sometimes wished he'd hit her. It would be easier to prove. Either way, no one deserves this treatment from someone who was supposed to love her.

Glad to see this article made Letterpile. It's an important issue and for a long time HP didn't like people to write about it. That seems to have changed and that's a good thing. Discussion will often assist in resolving these issues and so it's important not to forbid them.

I'm glad you chose to write about this issue because the more daylight it gets the quicker it is likely to end.

Hope all is well with you. Not sure if I mentioned it previously, but the hail on Monday night a week ago broke my windshield. Have an area about 8" in diameter that I'm lucky it didn't break clear through and it will not pass inspection as is. Was attacked by a speeding shopping cart and a trash can that was turned into a missile last week Wed. night Aril 5. Wind was at least 70 mph during that storm. But I survived it.

Hope you and John and Chipper are well. Blessings dear friend . . . (Sharing this on FB)

I do think people should face these situations head on and not try to sweep them under the rug. It's long past when these things should have ended, but it seems there are some people who only know physical violence to settle their disagreements.

Glad you are shedding light on this problem of domestic abuse and violence. It needs to end permanently. People need to learn other means to settle differences. Dignified adult means, not mean childish ones.

Blessings and hugs to you both. Take care . . .

This is terrific. I am glad you are raising awareness.

I have never been in an abusive relationship but I read "Why Does He Do That?," and I felt like I was going crazy just reading it. It is such a detailed description of an abuser's mind, tactics, and why it is so hard to let the bruises show.

How heartbreaking! What beautiful poetry you write. I'm so sorry for your loss. It is terribky hard to let the bruises show but as long as there are safe places and people to support, hopefully more people will be comfortable to speak up.

Someone very close to me was abused by her boyfriend. If it happens just once, head for the door and don't look back. Don't assume it will never happen again.

Shyron,

This is heart breaking yet bless you for raising awareness and 'talking' about abuse out loud. No one should be hurt - ever.

Love you and holding you in my heart, Maria

Shyron, this is very powerful. "Let the bruises show" should become a world-wide mantra, just as "hell no, we won't go" became one during the Viet Nam war.

I'm sharing this piece to get the word out and to have every citizen shouting "let the bruises show"!

Sorry but my name does not come up unless I sign in again. Tried that before with untold hassle, so I better reply in this way.

Gosh Shyron it your poem was the result of a true story, then I hope the abuser of the first poem got a Jail sentence.

For the suffering and consequential loss of your friend I am very sad, but I am glad you are speaking up on her behalf for the sake of others. I have come to believe that women think it is not worth the risk to speak up against an abuser. If she is not protected by others, she may wind up having to go home with him at the end of the day. Thank you for writing the poems and putting this hub together as a tribute to your friend. Yes, let the bruises show.

I knew of someone who battled for many years with her husband. He beat her and ruined her life. After some she left him and that changed her a lot for the best. An issue that needs a lot of attention because many victims in such cases are still silent about their abusive relationships.

wow this was so amazing Shyron.. mouth opened, chin dropped amazing

Domestic abuse is on the rise in our country as well, Shyron. It is a travesty and needs to be brought out into the open and the perpetrators exposed.. let the bruises show. This poetry is wonderful. Thank you for sharing Linda Martin's story.

A poignant tribute to Linda. If women would only educate themselves to realize how these situations usually develop . . . first the verbal abuse often out of the blue, and for no reason. Then maybe a little slap or throwing something at you with intention of creating fear, if nothing else at first, but that also escalates, and before you know it you are living a nightmare 24/7.

So well written. No one could have expressed it better. I understand exactly what you are saying. It's so important to get out of these relationships as quickly as possible and to let the bruises show even the first time so that people will know. Better yet to leave before there are bruises.

Bless you for shedding daylight on this horrible situation that is no doubt like so many others we will read about on the obituary page until we make it stop. Take care . . .

Dear Shyron,

This is a sad reality for far too many women today. Thank you for bringing awareness via your powerful poem about a beautiful life lost.

I agree ...let the bruises show!

A young wife and mother of a small child (boy) was killed a couple of years ago just three miles up the road from my small town in another small town. The entire community is in shock. The husband/father was enraged that his young wife was filing for divorce and custody of their small child. His family is well known in our county. The young wife drove to her workplace (a doctor's office) and pulled up in front of the office, with her enraged husband following right behind her. He had a gun and when the young wife had gotten out of the car and attempted to run inside the doctor's office, he shot her in cold blood and told her coworkers that they better go inside if they didn't want to see it happen. Now, the small child will grow up without his loving mother and no father. The young father has yet to exhibit any remorse. To top that off, the parents of the father are wanting custody of the child ...so sad. The young mother's parents have custody at the moment.

It breaks my heart to read about your lovely friend and know of many others who have suffered the same fate.

God bless you.

Will share everywhere.

We must never be silent, tell everyone, lesve snd msybe they can get the help they need. Thank you for this article, so many women need to read it. Stella

Thought provoking and disturbing.

Hello Shyron. This is a sad, yet common event. I agree that not being silent is the path to take. The loss, of your friend, weighs heavy on you. You honor her.

This is a must for all to read

An abuser strikes again and again watching her bleed

First it's the words that cut like a knife

Then the fists break and bruise, sometimes taking her life

When I see bruising day after day

I ask, " What happened? " She looks away

This happened to a sister of mine

She left him time after time

Only to return when he begs and pleads

Promising to never again commit these horrible deeds

Thank God she left him before it was too late

She lived to love again, knowing only goodness from her soulmate.

I'm so sorry for your loss of a friend, Linda. God bless...Hugs.

Thank you Shyron for shedding more light on this terrible epidemic. Our sweet Linda will never be forgotten. Let her story be heard so maybe many other lives will be saved.

This is so important. Having a loved one who recently left her husband because he threatened to kill her and her kids, I fully endorse speaking out and not protecting the abuser by keeping the violence secret. Secrets thrive in the dark. My loved one's husband has made threats to drown their toddler, call a family meeting then shoot her and the 3 kids execution-style and fake an emergency by dialing 911 then shooting first responders. He is an executive, Boy Scout leader, regular church goer and mentally ill (non compliant with medication). She has her work cut out for her. She has faced disbelief and blame by the legal system and even some friends who know have made themselves suddenly scarce. I urge anyone who is facing this situation to get help immediately and for the rest of us to donate to our local women's shelter.

Shyron......This takes my breath away. Domestic abuse is a cancer on our society, a destroyer of families. We are all involved and must be part of the solution. Be aware, alert and step in if we must. The isolation, fears and "cover-ups" must stop. Believe the woman, listen to them, protect them and especially the children.

Zero tolerance for abuse, neglect & violence. Thank you Shyron for this important work and may Linda's memory fuel our resolve! Peace, Paula