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Alone on Spiritual Path

Author:

Val enjoys writing prose in rhymes by always leaving a message of a life truism in each piece.

Introduction

There is no map, no G.P.S., no signpost to follow as we are about to start our spiritual journey. It's a dive into the unknown, or else it can't be called spirituality. And just like those escaping from Biblical Sodom and Gomorrah, we are not to look back.

Not because we might turn into grotesque salt figures, but because nothing back there offers a reference to what is to be expected ahead. It's a journey of discovery, and mainly it's discovery of those aspects of ourselves that we haven't known.

New perspectives, new models of experiencing, new brain algorithms making a new thought pop out of nowhere, not caused by a habitual thinking sequence.

And for a strange paradox, although alone on that path, we don't feel lonely. We may know how poorly we have been understood, interpreted, perceived by others, but somehow it feels okay. As if we don't need that much attention after all, that much empathy -- let alone sympathy.

Life has become so much of inner dynamics that everyone and everything out there is just a part of it. Others' behaviors suddenly are merely a subject to our choice of experiencing -- not what their common definition would suggest.

In a sense, we "create" the suchness of everything, while not altering what is factual reality, only our interpretation of it. So that soddenly others can't "make us" happy, angry, sad, insulted, bored, whatever else -- without our inner "refinement" of the reasons for such feelings.

At a deep level we see how others' acting does something within their personal space, and our response does something within ours. There is no physical transfer, other than during a physical touch, whether pleasant of painful.

Responsibility over nourishing our inner reality, and a paramount sense of choice in each moment linger constantly with us, even into sleeping hours. How often it happens that in my dreams I am aware that I can redirect that "movie", and I do.

Well, at first it's like we have spirituality, and then spirituality has us -- for there is no return to the old self.

And we are still imperfect just like the rest of folks -- only imperfect in our own, now chosen way.

In the following three pieces of my prose in rhymes I am trying to depict some "side-effects" of spirituality.

At Times of Deep Meditation Something Gets Liberated from the Depth of Our Essence. -- Val Karas

At Times of Deep Meditation Something Gets Liberated from the Depth of Our Essence. -- Val Karas

Friends That I've Lost

I must have been born under an unusual star

and it took me quite some time to understand

how with my passion to call things as they are

it's like I was predestined to lose many a friend.


Now in a retrospect I don't see it as a loss

with them pushing their crap to an extreme

making noisy exhibition of personality flaws

machismo to fix their secret low self-esteem.


People want you to buy into their ego game

to pamper their importance that's full of crap

or else they may drop you without any shame

unless you'd leave before ending up in that trap.


Then families may join in that racket as well

advertising happiness that had to be bought

acting as if under some overachieving spell

ignoring your presence more often than not.


Somehow I've always been like a mirror to the other

where they could see their truth they tried to hide

so much so that even my presence would bother

making them uncomfortable very deep inside.


Well, I've been loved and hated by a same friend

both envied and belittled in their confused heart

long before friendship would come to an end

with so much that was driving us apart.

No Role Models for Me

I never sought any role models to follow

not because no one I saw as deserving

but my spiritual path I had to take solo

meditating, self-exploring, observing.


Without any guide available out there

who could assist me in my inner quest

now, not that anyone would really care

to help me pass that each intimate test.


And yet, to me, loneliness doesn't exist

as I feel one with each human being

nurturing love is at the top of my list

nothing to do with my disagreeing.


For I disagree with whole dogmatic paradigm

religious, or political, or the one of medicine

in many ways it resembles a high crime

so much beyond an imperfection sin.


Then, there are minds that I deeply respect

not to an extent to become their imitation

yet, feeling how we mentally connect

praising them with no hesitation.


But no role models at this culture bazaar

we all have our own, distinct path to take

my spiritual signpost is some lonely star

in this vast universe I'm of my own make.

Void of Ambition

Watching the movie "Invisible Man"

I could easily see myself in that role

for others might look at me all they can

without having single glimpse into my soul.


So I keep sharing a story or two

sometimes just showing I'm still alive

while others may see them as false or true

before filing them in a trivial memories' archive.


Without seeing in me a single competitive bone

and with no ambition to make some big splash

not sharing these stories to be well known

in this life that may all be gone in a flash.


And yet, for that brief moment of literary intrusion

there could be a chemistry no matter how small

between two souls sharing momentary illusion

about one's response to the other's call.

© 2021 Val Karas

Comments

Val Karas (author) from Canada on January 31, 2021:

Kathy -- When we verbalize our experiences they sound so relatable, but qualitatively we are still coming from so many different places, because our inner dynamics are more unique than we may suspect. Only as we tune into collective consciousness can we communicate them pretty well; but the more we expand our individual consciousness, being present in it most of the time, it would be like trying to describe the taste of strawberries to someone who never tasted them.

Your short comment tells a lot about your depth, my friend, and thank you for your kind words of praise.

Kathy Henderson from Pa on January 30, 2021:

Val,

This is so introspective and intriguing. The journey of your spiritual quest captured me. I am sure the emotions are relatable for many on their individual paths. Well done!

Amarachi Nkwoada from Nigerian on January 29, 2021:

Very interesting twist and turns

BRENDA ARLEDGE from Washington Court House on January 29, 2021:

Val,

Thank you.

You are so right on cue with being able to control one's tears when necessary. I tend to do that when I know I must be strong for others.

Time for that when I'm alone...if I so desire.

Guess I just need to choose my state of mind more often...cause I have my moments.

Most people call that the stubbornness coming out.

I enjoy your way of approaching life. I wish more people had your ideas...have a great weekend.

Val Karas (author) from Canada on January 29, 2021:

Brenda -- Responding to one question of your comment -- Yes, by never feeling loneliness we can still "feel the touch of love". Like I said: I choose my states of mind, so I also choose when to allow my romantic moods to flood my heart, to share it with the one I love..

Likewise, I may get tears in my eyes while fully surrendering to a gentle classical piece of music, but my eyes will stay dry at a scene which commonly fills others' eyes with tears. It's all about living consciously, not switched to "automatic pilot" programmed by society with what is "appropriate" response.

Be glad you are different, dear friend. Make the most of it.

BRENDA ARLEDGE from Washington Court House on January 29, 2021:

Val,

I love your introduction to these poems.

If only we could all feel this way.

To not feel loneliness would be nice...but then would we ever have known the touch of love?

The first poem, " Friends That I've Lost" is my favorite.

I can relate ...I've always felt like I was born under an unusual star.

I'm definitely not like others around me.

Great writing.

Val Karas (author) from Canada on January 29, 2021:

Umesh -- Thank you, I am glad you liked it.

Umesh Chandra Bhatt from Kharghar, Navi Mumbai, India on January 29, 2021:

Beautiful composition.

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