Self Painted Muse
Alexandra Lang is a 22 year old performer currently traveling the world, writing about her time around the universe.
On my days off, I wear layers of silk, and stay in them until dusk.
On my days off, I apply my lipstick with a paintbrush, and become my own muse.
On my days off, he still calls me honey, and I swear I can taste the words as they escape into the air.
How many heartbreaks does it take to get to the center of the problem?
And was I always, or never the problem?
How satisfied I am knowing that I never took a second of you for granted.
When you kissed me goodnight and closed the door, I only threw the door back open for one final kiss because I knew it was going to be our one final kiss.
Call it a premonition. Call it a prediction.
A few months later, you call to say you forgive me, but for what?
I bet true forgiveness feels like holding your first sparkler, knowing it'll be beautiful for a short while, until you have to ignite the next fuse.
You are not forgiven for covering up my words with your lips, and expecting an invitation back into my mind.
I recognize your voice, and it will not be used to take mine away.
© 2021 Xandra Lang
