Sad Green Eye
My ideal Prince Charming has the biggest Flaw
He easily gets annoyed and doesn't like me at all
Although he's the Sweetest Pooh loved by all
Because of him, I, me and myself are eternally at a war.
Whenever I know that he's there with all of us
Just wondering, at least can't he like me a little?
Age is just a number, so for him, am I too little?
Sadly I'm unable to keep my eyes off of him even if I'm crushed.
Sweetest Mr.Pooh like a Pirate stole my heart without my permission
I've been trying to push him away but he wouldn't even budge
Now I'm becoming a green eyed monster as he described once
As my only dream and wish to be the center of his attention.
During this festive season and the end of this year
I've been wondering how many he would have kissed and hugged
I feel so sad as I'm feeling very jealous of who got hugged
Since I didn't get, not even once in this year.
My ideal Prince Charming is the most unfair one in the Universe
He always give chocolates to everyone around him except me
Even when I asked him, he still didn't give me
I felt so sad and jealous of others because of his not nice actions.
To me he was the most Sweetest and the nicest person I came across
But now it seems like he's purposely mean to me
I feel so ashamed whenever I'm engulfed in jealousy
And my heart is so disappointed and completely lost.
I noticed that I have been feeling quite jealous for sometime. I even prayed God asking Him to make me a good young woman. I was feeling so ashamed of myself. I kept on suppressing these thoughts as I didn't like how I felt. Most probably in case if Sweetest Mr. Pooh sees this hub, he definitely will not be even fond of me anymore. He doesn't like jealous people :( But then again can't help the way I am. Although I'm not a big fan of getting attention from everyone, I do like getting attention from some people. Except for my mom, Pinkish Priest, my naughty sister and my brother who enjoys making me jealous, I don't think anybody else likes to be around a jealous person.
Being J - 29.12.2017
Even as a little girl I used to get so jealous
But not for the things that people expected
The things that made me so jealous
Are what I deeply craved and desired.
I'm not a big fan of hugs and kisses as I felt uncomfortable
But I like those who warmly kiss and hug my heart
Those who reminds me a lot about my father and is lovable
Happened to capture my innocent heart.
Even these past two weeks I was feeling very jealous
Because my mom had taken her leave from work
That means both my brother and sister gets to spend with her
Where I was being the cashier at my place of work.
I was missing both Sweetest Mr.Pooh and my mom
Imagining that my mom would have fed my siblings for lunch
According to my mom I'm too big to be fed from mom
I work hard to distract myself from thoughts about mom and lunch.
I remember sometime ago I hit it off with a new girl who came to our church
I thought she was very sweet, warm and very friendly
But as soon as Sweetest Mr. Pooh with 'that smile' welcomed her to our church
I suddenly didn't like her as it arose my jealousy.
Since that day, though I smiled with her, I avoided her
I just didn't like how I felt deeply within me
But now at church I hardly ever sees her
I hope it's not my fault as I feel a little bit guilty.
This is like me banging on the door of Sweetest Mr. Pooh's heart
I really liked when Sweetest Mr. Pooh was in his Thirties
He was really warm, welcoming, nice and caring
But I'm just wondering has he twisted his personality in his forties?
He's so not approachable, cold, distant and not at all smiling.
Even the way he sits on a chair, folding his arms
Facing away to the other side when the camera comes infront of him
No more the bubbly jumpy bumpy person with exaggerated expressions
Now he's as if to say, "I don't like you, leave me alone, you're bothersome!"
I just wanted to release my heart with these accumulating jealousy
I hope to leave behind them in this year and have a new beginning
The year 2018 to be a wonderful blessed year free from sad jealousy
For God to be in my heart as He fill me with fresh breathing.
I apologise for any kind of uncomfortable behavior that I may have caused
I thank all those who were so concerned about my heart
I truly appreciate your support and your care I applaud
I pray you have a blessed 2018 with a renewed heart :)
© 2017 rdsparrowriter