Rewinding the Cherished Reality Show Audio Tape
Heather has a Bachelor's Degree in English from Moravian College and has been freelance writing for more than 12 years.
Seemed to be caught up in a endless loop
Of my own making it seems to be
Designed myself into an impossible corner
Always kept latching onto the wrong things
Made them more important than they appeared to be
Chose allies and lovers based on their importance
And not their true and deceptive value
Wondered when it would be time to get off
This ridiculous merry go round of nightmares
A ride that no one wants to be on in the slightest
Ready to smack the amusement park attendant
For keeping me on for five minutes too long
Now, locked in a private narrow pathway of tunnel vision
Can't see nothing except a tiny viewpoint
Overlooking the pleasures to the left and right
Just out of focus, until the direction is forcibly changed
Started to panic because unable to adjust the setting
On the mental recording device locked inside
Sweating and shaking begins to set in at worst possible time
Don't understand how things could end up like this
Doctors seemed to push more and more pills to help cope
Not sure if that was truly the answer to the problem
Needed a permanently proper fix
No more band aids to temporarily cover up the symptoms
Searching for some peace and quiet
Unable to find it amongst the chaos closing in
Drowning in a tidal wave of stress and medication
An undercurrent of being a human Jack in the Box
Always bouncing upwards continuously
Never coming back down to rest properly
Hit cruising altitude one too many times
Got repeated motion sickness for the trouble
Could not function on old fashioned solid ground anymore
Made an impulsive decision to saw off this demented spring
Stopped the process in the 11th hour thankfully
When the bouncing finally stopped for once
And reality started to finally set in
Glad that happened: best decision ever made
Now time to work on being on solid footing again
Not a moment too soon
Now, the real work begins....
Need to know if I'm ready for it
Yes, I think I am ready to find a new ride to situate myself on
What the doctor truly ordered.