Christmas Day has come and gone
No carols, sleigh bells, or jingly songs.
No family crowds no care in sight,
On to returning things we now dislike.
Despite the lines we persevere
With reasons dull and insincere
2 hours long, one sad cashier,
my toxic tongue, still cavalier.
I prayed for her an hour before,
With hordes of us now at her door
I swore that I would be real nice
a small return, that would suffice—
An hour past now I’ve forgot
The reason why I’m at this spot
My face now red and burning hot
I’d like a beer, a whiskey shot
What madness here has settled in?
With anger as a synonym
Our patience wearing very thin,
Plasma boiling straight through my skin
I said I prayed for her before,
Now for her head I’m calling for.
Just give the man his just return
This product sucks we’ve clearly learned
This time of year just be supine,
And know by now we’ve lost our minds
Just give us what we really need
A manager to intercede
Another soul to tear apart
Someone who knows the rules by heart
At least someone who’s semi-smart
Not you, some punk ass kid from start.
The lies contrived to make this swift,
To gift myself the proper gift
My money back I did insist,
I hoped the worker won’t resist
A song and dance, laid out once more,
Enough to get me out the door
With cash in hand no looking back,
A midday snack and then relax.
With one more store atop the list,
Another try to coexist.
If they create an animus,
I might seek some more cannabis.
.
Comments
Paul Neglia (author) from Poughkeepsie, NY USA on December 29, 2018:
Thanks Verlie. It was awful, i may just keep everything next year. Thank you for your kind words.
Verlie Burroughs from Canada on December 29, 2018:
Fun write Paul. So brave to enter the fray on boxing day. I'm keeping all my gifts, taking to the thrift store what doesn't fit. No line-ups for me, sorry about thee... hahahe
Paul Neglia (author) from Poughkeepsie, NY USA on December 29, 2018:
Thanks John. With the three kids and relatives that dont communicate very well, i end up on these return lines too often. Its just chaos, and you know those cashiers dont want to deal with your crap and phony reasons for the returns. Im trying hard to instill that "its the thought" idea into my kids now so they dont celebrate Christmas for the wrong reasons. Thank you so much for your comments my friend and have a Happy New Year.
John Hansen from Gondwana Land on December 29, 2018:
Haha, Paul I used to often be on the returns line after Christmas, but that’s a thing of the past. Now I am thankful for any gift I receive as they say “it’s the thought that counts.” This was a fun poem, I enjoyed it.
