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Quest for Identity

An artist,a poet at heart & a teacher by profession, pursuing masters in psychology now. Passionate about reading & writing the expressions.

random-thoughts-about-identity

My Journey

There was a time when I considered myself as worthless,

I kept on cursing myself for my insignificant unworthy identity;

Since I gathered my consciousness and started to reason,

I saw the people so rich, intelligent and famous around me,

Among which I could always see myself as the ugly duckling.


I couldn't stand against the expectations of my parents,

Whether in academics or sports, never did I get the best grades,

Papa used to compare us with the ones with high accolades,

To make me feel like a nasty creature hopeless valueless,

Thus I confined myself to stay in isolation away from distress.


I longed to have some appreciation for any of my deeds

Unfortunately, I waited for the likes and positive comments

And kept on ignoring all the negative critical comments

Which made me bring out the best of my hidden talents

Further seasoning me from a naive to a mature adult.




Self Appreciation

I read so many success stories

From every field of all the popular names,

There was one thing common among them

The ones who had had more problems

They could reach the higher destinations.

Each of them had a strong determination,

Firm faith, passion for the work and full devotion,

With these ingredients, they rode their expeditions.

I too earned an essence from their inspiration

We all need self-admiration and appreciation

Rather waiting for others for a word of motivation

There I started to work for just self-satisfaction

But not to satisfy anyone else's expectation.


© 2020 Anupam Mitu

Comments

Anupam Mitu (author) from MUMBAI on October 02, 2020:

Thank you so much dear Bill for your love and support. I feel proud to have such great friends here. It is so exciting to know that I have such great readers whose writings I myself love to read.

Bill Holland from Olympia, WA on October 01, 2020:

Your self-awareness is refreshing. Your willingness to share your inner thoughts is also refreshing. Well done, my friend.

Anupam Mitu (author) from MUMBAI on October 01, 2020:

Dora, thank you so much dear for your words of appreciation.

Anupam Mitu (author) from MUMBAI on October 01, 2020:

Rosina, thank you so much dear for reading and commenting.

We all inspire each other with our strong steps.

Lots of love and blessings dear

Anupam Mitu (author) from MUMBAI on October 01, 2020:

Lorna, thank you so much dear. I was waiting for you for a long time. God bless you dear.

Yes, circumstances vary from person to person and at the end it's the person itself to come out of that.

Dora Weithers from The Caribbean on October 01, 2020:

Thanks for sharing your journey from low self-worth to self-satisfaction. Your beauty shines from inside out.

Rosina S Khan on October 01, 2020:

Your journey on finding hidden talents and self-appreciation are both important for surviving and thriving in life. I am glad you gained the knowledge on how to find your true identity. I really appreciate it. Thank for sharing, Anupam

Lorna Lamon on October 01, 2020:

I always feel that we are our harshest critics and it's sad that the expectations of others just reinforces feelings of inadequacy. We are all different and each one of us is special in their own way. Children rely on validation from their parent's and when this does not happen it can take years for them to realise their own self-worth. Your poems are full of hope and optimism which many will relate to. Beautifully written as always.

Anupam Mitu (author) from MUMBAI on October 01, 2020:

Thank you so much dear Ann.

Yes, this comment thing is a grear concern for the hubbers. I read that article shared by John and also the link that he has shared regarding the comment part.

It's sad for us that we won't be able to comment on the niche sites and at present almost all the compositions are sent to some or the other niche sites.

They have given various reasons for this action but it's very sad for us to digest this as we enjoyed more when we found the writer interacting with the readers, which felt very friendly and with that we could make so many good friends here by understanding the emotions of each others through the comments.

The only thing which we can do is that, be quick in replying the comments or else we won't be able to do once it's moved

I love your lovely comment and friendly gesture.

Lots of love and blessings dear.

Ann Carr from SW England on October 01, 2020:

I have just tried to leave a comment on your hub about emotions being contagious, but there is no comments feature available. It's a problem with the niche sites and is causing worry amongst many hubbers. I just want to mention that other hub, to say that the poetry and the prose shows your insight into your pupils and into the human condition - we are indeed greatly affected by others' emotions and can pick up all sorts of nuances which make us feel similar. Great hub. Pity HP/Maven don't let us say so in that hub! Well done!

Ann

Ann Carr from SW England on October 01, 2020:

It takes courage to persevere against the odds, with no encouragement. As you say, often this makes people stronger, more determined to do well. Those with adversity often have more incentive to succeed and probably do better than they would have done otherwise. So sad when families do not nurture the self-worth in their children, whatever their abilities.

I like your references to cookery terms: seasoning, ingredients, essence etc. It's a great way to describe people's lives and how they grow with the right attitude.

Ann

Anupam Mitu (author) from MUMBAI on September 30, 2020:

DreamerMeg, thank you for sharing that. Based on this I too remember one similar incidence. My second cousin (father's cousin's daughter) studies in the same school I was working. She used to be very excited and full of spirit with her friends in the class while at home she seems to be so serious and never had a smile. When I said this thing to my uncle on my visit, he said, " We need to control our kids, we have to make them something better than you. Just making them happy all the time is not our agenda." I was spellbound as it didn't ended there, he tried his best to show me that I was a non existent fellow.

DreamerMeg from Northern Ireland on September 30, 2020:

When I went to university, I stayed near an uncle and his family and visited there for tea each week. Their children, my cousins, always did well at school (unlike me and my brothers and sisters) but one day, I heard the following: "Daddy I got 97% in my exam today." I expected to hear "well done" or something similar. But my uncle said "What happened to the other 3%?" I was astounded. If I had got 97% I would have been really pleased and so would my parents. I think it was probably a joke but the cousin was not very happy. Everyone needs positive appreciation and I think it's hard for an adult to appreciate themselves if they never received it as a child.

Anupam Mitu (author) from MUMBAI on September 30, 2020:

Yes Flourish, it's really sad when people consider them as worthless. I was one among them. But today, I try my best to show the light even in extreme darkness to many. And thankfully, by the grace of god, I'm doing well in my mission.

Lots of love dear

Anupam Mitu (author) from MUMBAI on September 30, 2020:

Thank you Ankita. Lots of love and blessings dear.

FlourishAnyway from USA on September 30, 2020:

Each of us is unique so I feel sad when someone expresses that they have felt worthless. We may not be the best at anything but the combination of talents and personality factors and personal characteristics make us one-of-a-kind.

Ankita B on September 30, 2020:

Beautiful poems. I loved how you have described your journey and concluded with a great message. A truly inspiring poem.

Anupam Mitu (author) from MUMBAI on September 30, 2020:

Thank you so much Eric. Lots of love and blessings.

Eric Dierker from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A. on September 30, 2020:

Fantastic - a good journey expressed with depth. Thanks.

Anupam Mitu (author) from MUMBAI on September 30, 2020:

So true dear Kalpana. There is webseries on Amazon "Four more Shots", as you are from India, I hope you may have watched that.

A webseries just like Friends with four female friends.

One of the friends gets a dating app and by mistake, she uploads her breast there for which she gets a lot of appreciation by the app users that she had never received before. She gets so much of confidence with that, she keeps on uploading her pictures.

We all long to be applauded and appreciated for our work.

I love reading the comments and then replying to them. I am an avid reader as well.

Today my whole day is devoted to hubpages. Right now reading a few short stories.

Kalpana Iyer from India on September 30, 2020:

That is the way to live - to self-appreciate first without depending on others to find value in you.

I have always noticed it's mostly the strangers who fill our life with warm comments. I wonder if familiarity breeds contempt for many. We take things for granted and stop appreciating or being vocal about the positives. When we become self-reliant and confident about ourselves, this need for constant validation goes away. It is something one learns with experience. Till then, we keep yearning for others attention and approval especially of our loved ones. And when that doesn't come, most turn bitter.