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Bad Habits Are Hard To Break

We have Done Them For So Long

They become part of us

Often they feel like an extension of who we are

Do they really define us?

Let us take a closer look?

i have been a people watcher ever since I was a kid

Seeing what other people do

Then questioning their own motives and behaviors

Wondering if they made the right choices

Then pretending if I was in there shoes

Then I slowly watch in my own life

The mistakes I have made

As I try to correct them

How difficult it is

Even though I know in my heart it is wrong

i am torn to do the right thing

I am so tempted to do the wrong thing

Will temptation win?

Many times it does

I feel sorry for myself

I beat myself up

I think if I get mad enough

I will change

It lasts for a while

Then some how it fades

It doesn't leave a lasting empression

I slowly slip back into that old familiar and yet destructive pattern

Here is one of many examples to come

I bought a pair of work shoes

After a few months the soles began to pull apart

I think they were made wrong

I tried to return them

Because I wear them to work

They look beat on and wouldn't take them back

I even asked if I could just have another pair

Shoes shouldn't wear out that fast

She said you had to return them sooner

I will fix them myself

I bought the glue to fix them

I recently got another pair of work sneakers

Would I make the same choice or different ?

Then in my mind coming back to the same problem or experience

Watching to see how things played out

The proof is in the pudding

I know what I want to do

In the meantime I bought another pair of work sneakers

Instead of shoes

They are working out well

I have yet found the time to fix the old broken pair

i see them every day

Sitting on the shoe rack

Desperately waiting for me to take action

i can say I have no time

That is a lie

i can say I forget all about it

I do but I am also reminded every day as I see them

Staring me in the face

When I put my other work sneakers on

Why do I put it off?

Am I too lazy to try to fix them

When these work shoes started separating

I knew there was a problem

I still wore them

Putting off the inevitable

Until it became too late

When I finally took my time to return them it was too late

Now I paid money to fix them

Months later I still haven't done anything

My wife should have reminded me?

I try to push off the blame

I am a procrastinator

It is not her responsibility or job to fix my work shoes

It is my way of removing the shame

Little things can become big things

This is one problem of many that builds and builds

In my mind I want to do the right thing

In reality I do something else

My drive and desire is lost

I lack effort to finish what I started

Today we have a new day

I shall see what I will do

To make this a laughing matter

It has been so long

I even misplaced the glue

© 2022 DREAM ON

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