Nightmares of 10:22
I thought I saw your face
Your piercing blue eyes
Your chiclet teeth
I thought I saw you
All I saw was me
I awoke suddenly
Terrified with hope
That maybe this wasn't a dream
Maybe it was a joke
You weren't really gone, they said
Grinning between their dimples
He just let you fade away
It really is that simple
He wanted to trick and connive you
With the sincerest of belief
That the path you should've chosen
Was parted from his feet
He wanted to keep his friendships
Some of his family, too
The only reason for faking his death
Was to get away from you
I confronted him with passion
Limbs trembling with fear
My vision steady with his eyes
Insisting that he hear
He replied in anger
Animosity at the least
He looked stunned and said,
"Turn away from me
I wanted you to believe it
For two years now, you have
That I really have been gone
Your dear and precious dad
You took for granted when I was gifted
My only shot at life
Now that I'm living again
Loneliness will be your wife
Leave me alone, daughter
You were never supposed to find
That I loved life outside of you
That, I can decide
It was all an elaborate prank
Oh, just as you wished
Now I'm gone forever
Without so much as a kiss
You cry about me daily
You think about me at night
Ironic how little I crossed your mind
When I was in plain sight
I hope to regain sentience
Without you being a part
You thought that avoiding me
Was so incredibly smart
That's right
Run away from dysfunction
Run away from your fears
When you decide to return
As expected, I won't be here
Write about me in your poems
I'll visit you at night
Causing grief in the morning
Your anguish is my delight
You wish that you could change
That you could throw roses at my laces
That you could rid yourself of guilt
And enter my good graces
It's a little too late for penitence
Far too far for remorse
Your guilt was buried with my ashes
Your love, with my corpse
I wish you hollowed eyes
I wish you gnashing of teeth
I wish you a painful death
I wish you the life of me."
© 2019 Jordan Hertaus
