There was this crazy old event, that once happened to me,
and all about this, my story I did tell to my old buddy, Jeff.
It all started when I bought me this single little lottery ticket,
Bought it because there was only just the one of them left.
I almost fell over, passed out, when I'd just heard the news,
My ticket did win me millions of bucks, none that I'd refuse.
Now I could finally just quit my job at that old furniture store,
Where we had so many shopper-stalkers, to shame, galore.
The very first thing that I decided with new found money,
I went on out and tried to buy me this great big fancy car.
Then I went down town, later, looking at those foreign jobs,
Just to inquire about each and find out how much they are.
The salesman, was a wise guy, scowling face to be feared,
He did not like my appearance at all, or of my big red beard.
Told me that he had a cheaper one, some where on his lot,
An old Jag-u- warrr, but the car's motor tended to run so hot.
I told him that I liked that cute little yellow Beetle-bug,
Then he just shrugged, laughed, said that one was his.
I ended up buying me a brand new Caddi on that day,
American-made is always the best, that's the way it is.
My next purchase, a big one, a new home, my own to be,
Six bedrooms, five bathes, two kitchens, was for all to see.
Located on a thousand acres, had two lakes for me to fish,
With tall fences around it all built, did meet my every wish.
My old pal, Jeff, advised me to find myself one good lawyer,
and to put put most of my investment in more than one bank.
Got me a crook, lots of my money he took, was untrustworthy,
As I went to a bank to write a check, my account went blank.
Had to sell most of my land, did build a small house out there,
Now I drive a secondhand truck, my message I want to share.
Never think to win millions, life will be easy as a piece of cake,
There's more out there to rip you off, all of your money to take.
If you do win a little bit, be careful, please don't be any dunce,
All it takes is for everyone to find out, only reported just once.
Relatives will pop out of the woodwork, you never knew about,
Quietly put all your winnings away, just try out a different route.
I still enjoy trips to my old fishing pond, I had managed to keep,
The fish I catch, I always through back, always each do release.
You'll never know when you have to eat, one day, so very soon,
Your house and groceries gone, all of your income then to cease.