Loving A Monster
Rosemary is author of six books on mental health and inspirational poetry. She is a motivational speaker and a volunteer peer advocate.
I loved you
For the monster that you are
I did not know
That you were empty inside
All my life
I believed your lies
The way you related to me
Made me codependent and me I sometimes despised
I had to learn
how to grow
To let go of past ties
In time I grew more and more
Became stronger and stronger
And in prison to you I am no longer
You bought me any way you could
Sometimes you used money to get me to do your bidding
Unfortunately your lies and deception
hurt not just me but others as well
This is just my tale to tell
Of how we can overcome
You played your role
you needed others
And used your children
As you were a mother
To entertain you
To keep you company
While dividing them against each other
It's really been painful
time and time again
And now that you're 87
Perhaps it has to end
I no longer can be a victim
No matter what it costs me I need to be free
Free of pain
Free of jealousy
Free of whatever tricks you try to throw my way
Your emptiness inside
made you think it was okay to lie
This desperate feeling in you
Was what controlled your actions
I do hope that if there is a God
He forgives you
For all the pain and bullshit
You put us....through
Comments
BRENDA ARLEDGE from Washington Court House on February 21, 2021:
It is so real. I have seen anither family where the mother treated the youngest one with favoritism. I wonder if that is common in larger families?
That was a family of 5.
My heart goes out to you for the patience you have had to endure all these years.
I cannot fathom being that strong. It breaks me apart.
Take care of yourself & put yourself first for once.
schoolgirlforreal (author) on February 21, 2021:
Thanks Misbah
My mom had 10 kids.
She was nice to the youngest.
I am the 10th child.
I didn't notice her manipulation until my 30s.
schoolgirlforreal (author) on February 21, 2021:
Hi John,
good to see you.
Thanks for your visit.
Misbah from The Planet Earth on February 21, 2021:
Very sad and my heart aches after reading it
I am speechless, really don’t have good enough words to express how I am feeling after reading it.
Mother is always a whole world to a child
The very first school of a child is a mother
She teaches the child everything good, but if the mother doesn’t do her part good the personality of the child breakdown
Blessings
John Hansen from Queensland Australia on February 21, 2021:
This was a sad read. For a mother to treat her children that way is wrong. As Brenda said...a narcissist for sure.
schoolgirlforreal (author) on February 21, 2021:
Thank you, Brenda,
This validation and understanding means a lot. It's so tricky, that I try to believe it's not true/real.
It's the hardest thing to believe.
God bless.
BRENDA ARLEDGE from Washington Court House on February 21, 2021:
This touches on the sadness & heartache left behind from a narcissist.
I wonder if they ever truly know the pain they inflict.
I have read that they do not feel emotions.
A sad tale to tell, but others can relate.
