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I'm One Hot Mess

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I Watch Many Of My Ideas Go Up Into Smoke

I have learned to be o.k. with it

I am a dreamer, not a finisher

Everyone has there good qualities and bad

For as long as I can remember

I would think up things nobody else has thought of

Not in a bragging way

In a constructive and positive way

I would laugh when people would say I copied someone else

I read it somewhere

They could never find any proof

Talking and dreaming with each word that comes out of my mouth

As if it was happening right in front of my eyes

Friends and family would listen

They would sometimes sit with doubt and laugh it off

I knew better

I didn't always know-how

To make it happen

There was an instinct inside of me

A gut feeling it could happen

Maybe not today but in the near future

Sometimes maybe one or two years

Then other times as many as ten years in the making

I would say years later just like I said then

Remember, I told you

Most of the time

I got I don't remember you saying that

That would frustrate me even further

Like all I said didn't matter

A few times a few people would remember

Then I got validation

It was o,k, someone else carried out what I could only dream

I felt it was just a matter of time

I go into little bits of depression

A kind of funk

I get moody and irritable

People around me ask me why

I tell them

They say then you should of done something then

I say I would of if I could of

I never had the right group of people that would spend time and energy

Like me creating making things better

They think it is an excuse

It's not

You have to have a team of people to make things happen

Money and time are required

My ideas are ground breaking and revolutionary

Even if it is only in my head

I learned the only way I can get myself out of the place I don't want to be

Is to dive right back and create again

One day I will put the right combination together

It will be a day like no other

Until then thank you for coming along for the ride

Don't forget to buckle up

We might hit a few bumps in the road

I don't want to see you go flying

Now is the time you can yell and even scream

Give your lungs a good road test

Turn all your anger upside down on it's head

For happiness is layers and layers deep

Now they can rise to the surface

Then show you life at it's best

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