I Lost You and I Lost Myself Too

Updated on March 24, 2019
Source

"I asked one
but you gave me none.
Why'd you can't give me what I want?"

---

You pass across the street every morning
Putting newspaper in every single house
and knock on their doors to remind them
that there's already one

From the outside at 6:30 A.M
I could hear the beep of your bicycle
you are using to deliver the newspapers

Knock! Knock!

---

I rushed in to the door
I didn't care how messy I looked that morning,
What mattered was to see your blue eyes, thick eyebrows and killer smile

"Good morning!"
Your deep voice told
that completed my day.

On the next day,
You passed across the street
Never forgetting to deliver me one
of the newspapers

Knock! Knock!

I rushed in to the door
I offered you to come in,
"Sure, dear"
and I saw how your bluest eyes sparkled

Coffee?
And we toast for brewed

Brewed coffee for Tuesdays
Hot chocolate for Wednesdays
French bread for Thursdays
Cereals for Fridays

"This is my last day" you've told
"On your job?" I asked

And then you stood
Left me with a dark chocolate on the table where we used to eat

You silently closed the door
But it seemed that I heard a loud slam

On a Saturday morning,
I waited for the two knocks on the door...

I waited for you
Until it hit me that there's no you to come.

Sunday,
You didn't show up
So I lost hope and wept to death

Knock! Knock!

I rushed in to the door

"Good morning!"

I'm about to hug the person standing next to the door
But I saw a girl

"Where's Nick?"
"Nick?"
The girl laughed and left

"Can you ask him to come here tomorrow morning and bring me dark chocolates?"

"Okay" the girl replied while laughing.

I waited for you on Monday
until it became a routine every week.

Hoping for you on Mondays
Brewed coffee we used to toast during Tuesdays
Hot chocolates we used to sip even it burns our tongue during Wednesdays
French breads we used to share during Thursdays
And cereals that took an hour for us to finish during Fridays

"Good morning!"

I'm about to hug the person standing next to the door
But I saw an old man

"Where's Nick?"
"Nick?"
The old man laughed and left

"Wait! Can you give him this letter?
I wrote this for him
Please, tell him, I will wait for his answer."

"I asked one
but you gave me none.
Why'd you can't give me what I want?
It's my favorite after all.

No, you are my favorite.
Why'd you just left me?
I thought you like me as much as I like you
Please, come back,
even without chocolates...
It's you who I want, Nick."

The old man read out loud.

"How could you...
Why did you read it?"

"Are you mad? Okay, I'll not bring this to Nick" the old man teased.

"I'm not mad, okay? Just bring the letter to Nick."

Saturday...

Knock! Knock!

I rushed in to the door
There's no one standing next to the door
But
There is a box in the floor waiting to be opened

I brought it inside
Opened it
And a lot of dark chocolates are there

It took a while for me
to see the letter at the bottom of the box.

It wrote

"I asked one
but you gave me none.
Why'd you can't give me what I want?
It's my favorite after all.

No, you are my favorite.
Why'd you just left me?
I thought you like me as much as Ilike you
Please, come back,
even without chocolates...
It's you who I want, Nick."

I cried and stumbled as I read it
Mom ran towards me...
Cried with me

"Oh dear, stop torturing yourself.
You've been doing all these by yourself everyday.
Coffees
Hot chocolates
French breads
Cereals
All alone...
The one you've read

Is a letter you wrote for yourself"

Knock! Knock!

I rush in to the door
I don't care how messy I look this morning
I am happy with what I saw...

"Nick?"

Questions & Answers

    Comments

      0 of 8192 characters used
      Post Comment
      • Kat Oblena profile imageAUTHOR

        Kat Oblena 

        4 weeks ago from Philippines

        Hey @Dabby Lyric. I really appreciate your positive feedback. Thank you! :)

      • profile image

        Dabby Lyric 

        4 weeks ago

        Well done! We can all relate to this on some level. The image is mesmerizing!

      • Kat Oblena profile imageAUTHOR

        Kat Oblena 

        4 weeks ago from Philippines

        Thank you @Md Adnan for your feedback! :)

      • Velcro profile image

        Md Adnan 

        4 weeks ago from India

        A very poetic narration especially the presentation of important elements which kept me bound to it till the very end. It was a beautiful experience reading it . Thanks for sharing !!

      working

      This website uses cookies

      As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, letterpile.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

      For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://letterpile.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

      Show Details
      Necessary
      HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
      LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
      Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
      AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
      HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
      HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
      Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
      CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
      Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
      Features
      Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
      Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
      Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
      PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
      MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
      Marketing
      Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
      Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
      Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
      Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
      Statistics
      Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
      ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
      Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)