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I Liked You First


I think is actually like you, and that scares the demons outta me. Am just not used to feeling like this leave alone saying it out loud. I honestly don't know how to deal with this, I really don't know how to even deal with it.
I think I might actually love you, and that's even scarier in my head than it may actually be. All this is kinda new to me and what terrifies me is that I may end up dealing with it the wrong way if I at all ever decide to really pursue this.
I think ( in my head) that I may actually be ready to make you smile and probably hold your hand and pretty much show you off to the world. I have calculated every possible way this could play out and although it doesn't go well in most of the scenarios my heart still wants to try.
My head thinks you might actually be the love of life. yeah, its really hard trying to lock you out of my thoughts.
And i tend to buy the thought that I may really and actually like you but for some whole other different reason, I think I liked you before my head and heart thought of it. I liked you first.

© 2022 Amani Utembu

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