How to Be a Famous Celebrity

Ravi Shankar Rajan is a software program director who writes on varied subjects from history, archaeology to leadership and poetry.

We Are All Addicted to Celebrities

Whether we admit it or not, our world is addicted to celebrities. And It’s often baffling how some perfectly ordinary people go from zero to hero in no time at all. Ever wondered just how the likes of Kim Kardashian and Rihanna became megastars overnight?

So if you are also itching to be a celebrity overnight in supersonic speed, here are some ways to do so. Needless to say, these haikus are inspired by dear Hubber Brenda Arledge's week-23 prompt "Laughter"

Wear Something Outrageous

Wardrobe malfunctions.

Bras as T-shirts, belts as bras.

Born fashionista.

Publicize Your Bizarre Beauty Secrets

Fresh bird poo face masks.

Bathing in blue goat’s urine.

Natural beauty.

Eat or drink a LOT of one thing

I eat, drink and sniff,

only fresh, ripe strawberries.

the more, the better.

Check in a Rehab

I need to detox,

in high-end private rehab,

with real live streaming.

Keep People Guessing on Your Dating Life

On-off, off-on, no.

Public makeups and breakups.

All rumors welcome.

Reality TV show

Show off your true self.

Not for free but for a fee.

Instantly famous.

Be a Selfie Addict

Sexy, dour, happy.

Undisputed selfie queen.

I rule Instagram.

Wash Your Dirty Linen in Public

Be open-minded.

Let skeletons tumble out.

Be brave and fearless.

Be Really, Really Obnoxious

Proven fact of life.

assholes become celebs.

More rude, more famous.

© 2021 Ravi Rajan