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F.R.I E.N.D

fri-end

F. R. I. E. N. D.
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I made peace with the fact that I can't have all of you to myself, so I try to have the most of the little portion I get of you because after all it's way better than not having you at all.
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I am the jealous friend, and I really suck at talking so the easiest way for me not to make a total fool of myself was write and hope you can hear my voice in these words.
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You probably the love of my life, and am masked up playing best friend to you. Masquerading as your best friend.
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I really wish there was nothing to lose if I was to pour out my heart to you, but am scared to lose you as a friend. That scares the crap outta me. Not having you at all is a nightmare that I personally don't think I'd wake up from.
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I hate seeing you holding hands and smooching other people, I wish that in every occasion that was me because you honestly live rent free in my head and my heart.
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So dear Friend if it doesn't work for use in this life or in this universe, maybe we could try in the next when the stars align.
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Because am pretty sure I'll never say this to your face, I wish I was just more than friends.

© 2022 Amani Utembu

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