Corona-Madness

Updated on March 25, 2020
Nicoartz profile image

I'm a caregiver and an artist. I received high honors in creative writing, fine arts, and sculpture at Montserrat College of Art.

Corona-Madness
Corona-Madness | Source

Corona-Madness

Hi everyone I hope your all healthy and have supplies. I'm doing fine and I'm not sick. Knock on wood. I've been camping out at home with the family, like most of you. I'm hoping to avoid this sickness. I have asthma so it wouldn't be the greatest if I got the virus. I wrote 3 light-hearted poems that may, or may not give you a chuckle. I hope that everyone enjoys them. Please stay safe out there.

The Corona-Munchies

Coronavirus madness is spreading everywhere. Don't cover your eyes, you need to be prepared.

You say you're not worried and your feeling really great. But you better hit the stores, before there's nothing on the plate.

You may not get sick, but the virus still plays its tricks.

Yes, you may be feeling fine, but other people have lost their minds.

You'll go to the store to buy some food, but lo and behold you see something rude.

All you needed was a little red meat and toilet paper, but you just find empty shelves; oh, what a caper!

You leave the store with nothing but stress on your mind. "How in the world will I wipe my behind?"

Your stomach is grumbling the cupboards now bare. Even worse yet, there's not a scrap for your rear.

I guess it doesn't matter there's nothing to come out. You haven't eaten in days, it's like a food drought.

You turn on the TV, to see the good word. They're talking about the virus and it's getting absurd.

The news says to stay in, but they're not a drop of food. You can try to order stuff online, but basically, you're screwed.

Toilet paper gouging

I'm locked in the house and I'm not sick a bit. Well, maybe just a little, but that's because I got to lit.

I have no supplies. I wasn't prepared. For the greed that would bestow us, the worse is now feared.

Some people are as bad as the virus itself. When the time came to help one another, they ravished shop's shelves.

They hoarded the goods and sold them for a profit.

"Oh, what a world!"
"People please stop it!"

They gobbled up supplies quick as a wink. Like the Grinch That Stole Christmas, oh, what a fink!

The virus is bad, but I wonder what's worse? Would you let your neighbor suffer, just to fill up your purse?

If the virus doesn't get me, the people sure will. Their greed is amazing, it'll give you the chills.

You say lighten up? Well, give me a break. Last night I was tempted to eat a fake cake!

I Hope It's Not The Coronavirus

I reach blindly towards my nightstand looking for a bottle of water, but it just crunches with emptiness in my hand.

I'm awake my throat is raw and dry.

Its 3 am my head is pounding, my eyes are watering.

My nose like a leaky faucet, dripping and annoying.

I move to go to the bathroom to take a leak, but the only thing flowing is my nose.

It runs down my face as if some little man was messing around up there and turn on the pipes.

I throw my head back and run for some tissue:

"AH...Ahhh...ACHOO..."

Oh no, I'm sick.

Questions & Answers

    © 2020 Jason Nicolosi

    Comments

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      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        2 weeks ago from AZ

        Thanks for the comment Bill. I really appreciate it. I actually love being home all the time too. It gives me more time to do thing I enjoy.

      • billybuc profile image

        Bill Holland 

        2 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        It's a strange world we find ourselves in right now. I get the feeling the blind are leading the blind right now. Thank the gods I'm an introvert. My lifestyle really hasn't been affected much by this pandemic, and for that I'm grateful. I enjoyed your poetry. Thanks for the respite from the ultra-serious.

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        2 weeks ago from AZ

        Thank you ver much Brenda! I truly appreciate your wonderful comments. Be safe!

      • Brenda Arledge profile image

        BRENDA ARLEDGE 

        2 weeks ago from Washington Court House

        These are so cute.

        Everytime i wake up sweating or my sinuses are plugged up I worry...but thankfully I am fine.

        The stores here are still quite a joke with people packing inside to find necessary supplies still missing.

        No alcohol to be found and toilet paper is only if you are lucky enough to be there when they unload the trucks.

        You did a great job on these.

        We all need to be lighthearted about this virus.

        Thanks for sharing.

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        5 weeks ago from AZ

        Thanks Kyler. I really appreciate the comment! I'm glad you enjoyed them and got a laugh.

      • Kyler J Falk profile image

        Kyler J Falk 

        5 weeks ago from Corona, CA

        The last one "I Hope It's Not The Coronavirus" is extremely hilarious to me, as it relates to how I treat every sneeze when outdoors.

        Whenever I sneeze outside now, in my obnoxious and boisterous manner as is so often present for humor, I yell out melodramatically, "Oh God, I have COVID-19!"

        Surely, everyone around me thinks I'm an idiot, but I can't help but love such humor!

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        5 weeks ago from AZ

        Thank you very much Tiyasha. I appreciate your thoughtful comments! Stay safe anf healthy.

      • Cattaleya profile image

        Tiyasha Maitra 

        6 weeks ago from Gurgaon

        Love these poems. In dark times like this, the reality of human beings come out. Compassion and unity are so rare, people behaving like monstrous beings. But again in that same world there is a section who volunteer to help.

        Your poems are colourful and humorous. Love the Grinch comparison. Take care and stay safe my friend.

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        7 weeks ago from AZ

        Hi, Nithya thanks for reading my poems. I'm happy you enjoyed them. It brought me a smile to my face, knowing that I made you laugh. Thanks. My family and I are all doing well. I hope that you're safe and healthy too. I appreciate.

      • Vellur profile image

        Nithya Venkat 

        8 weeks ago from Dubai

        Your poems brought out the laughs in these tough times. I hope you are fine, stay safe and take care.

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        8 weeks ago from AZ

        Hi, Louise I really appreciate the comment. I'm glad you enjoyed it. I hope that you stay safe and healthy.

      • Coffeequeeen profile image

        Louise Powles 

        8 weeks ago from Norfolk, England

        Jason, this was great to read. Please stay safe and well. It has got quite bad here in England too and are all under lockdown for the time being!

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        2 months ago from AZ

        Thanks for the great comment, Greg. I truly appreciate it! Stay safe and healthy.

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        2 months ago from AZ

        Hi Billy, glad to have your comment. Ha, ha, that's awesome. Ya, I don't mind hanging at home either. Actually I like being here all day. It allows me to spend more time with my family. Stay safe and healthy.

      • boxelderred profile image

        greg cain 

        2 months ago from Moscow, Idaho, USA

        As you said to me, Jason, I hope you can avoid the virus' uppercut to the jaw. Indeed, hope you can just avoid it all together. Thanks for keeping it (mostly) light!

      • profile image

        billybuc 

        2 months ago

        I don't know what to make of the fact that my life has hardly changed at all with the virus lockdown. lol This social distancing thing is what I've done for years.

        Be well! Thanks for the lighthearted start to my day.

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        2 months ago from AZ

        Hi Alyssa, I hope your doing well. I am happy that you enjoyed my poems. I liked the second poem best too. I appreciate your comment. Thanks.

        The world is going crazy, and these are tough times. Try and stay safe and healthy.

      • Alyssa Nichol profile image

        Alyssa 

        2 months ago from Ohio

        Hahahaha! I love the comparison to the Grinch. Spot on!

        Thank you for a moment of light-heartedness! :)

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        2 months ago from AZ

        Hi Olusegun. Thank you for the comment. Yes, unfortunate is likely only going to get worse, before it gets better. We may all be in for a long rough ride. The best we can do is hang on tight and hope it ends soon. Take care Olusegun. Stay healthy and safe.

      • OGUNDARE OLUSEGUN profile image

        OLUSEGUN 

        2 months ago from NIGERIA

        It's getting serious in my land too...Good insight.

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        2 months ago from AZ

        Thank you for the gracious comment, Lora. I appreciate it. I am very happy to know that you enjoyed these poems.

        This virus is not going anywhere. So neither am I. I have not left my house in weeks and now I'm getting short on basic supplies. If some people weren't like parasites, then we would have plenty for all. But that's not the case. So now many will suffer and struggle because of their greed.

        I love to read and now I have a lot of free time. So I'll definitely check out that book you mentioned. Thanks for the referral. Keep safe and healthy.

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        2 months ago from AZ

        Thanks, Ruby I'm so happy that I could make you laugh during these tough times.

        It's madness out there. Shopping has never been so stressful. It feels like there are no goods left on the planet. This virus got out of control fast. But people got out of control faster. Take care and God bless!

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        2 months ago from AZ

        Thanks, John. I appreciate the comments. I am happy you liked my illustration and poems.

        I was not prepared for this situation at all. I prefer to read a book or play a board game rather than watch the boob-tube. So I don't really see the news too often. Plus, I usually eat out. So there's usually a ton of food in my refrigerator anyway. I've been trying to buy stuff online but I haven't had much luck. I try ordering food online from the local stores, but their stock is scarce.

        All we can do is have faith and wait it out. I hope your friend gets supplies soon. My thought and prays are with you all. Take care of yourself and stay well.

      • Lora Hollings profile image

        Lora Hollings 

        2 months ago

        I really like your sense of humor in these poems and also the serious message as well! I laughed out loud with your second poem, especially the last line that “I was tempted to eat a fake cake.” It’s people’s behavior that maybe a lot worse than the virus. How true! This hoarding instinct if left untempered is scary. It looks like this virus is bringing about the best and worst in people. I hope that people realize they have a responsibility to others as well. If you want to read a great book about how a virus turns civilization on its head and most people into barbarians, read “Blindness” by Jose Saramago who won the Nobel prize for literature for his keen insight into our modern world and how our technology may end up destroying us along with people losing their morality. Wonderful job on these poems, Jason.

      • always exploring profile image

        Ruby Jean Richert 

        2 months ago from Southern Illinois

        I like your poetry, it made me laugh. People are amazing, some think only of themselves, while others are caring and share.

      • Jodah profile image

        John Hansen 

        2 months ago from Queensland Australia

        I love the drawing at the top, Jason. Your poems are humorous but also highlight our fellow human’s greed at a time of adversity, especially in the second poem. I have a friend who is locked in and didn’t think to stock up before hand who is now having great difficulty getting anything delivered. Not good.

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        2 months ago from AZ

        Thank you so much for your very kind words, Vidya. I truly appreciate it. I'm so happy I could help bring a little happiness into your life with these poems. Times are tough for all of us right now, and I pray we all get through it safely. I hope that you're doing well. Stay healthy and safe.

      • profile image

        VIDYA D SAGAR 

        2 months ago

        Hi Jason, a much needed respite from the dire circumstances that we are in. The poems brought a smile to my face and lifted my spirits. You are truly talented. Stay safe and keep bringing out these gems.

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        2 months ago from AZ

        Thank you so much for your kind and beautiful words, Lorna. I am so glad you enjoyed the poems. Humor is definitely a great tool to have to help lighten a seriously stress-filled time. Anytime I can bring laughter or a smile to someone's face, it brings me great joy. That's why I love art and creative writing so much. It's like you said in one of your poem before:

        "Our Words Have Wings" https://letterpile.com/poetry/Our-Words-Have-Wings

        Thanks again for admiring my artwork too. That means a lot to me. I appreciate your comments very much. Please keep safe & healthy through this crisis, and always.

      • Lorna Lamon profile image

        Lorna Lamon 

        2 months ago

        A wonderful trio Jason which lifted my spirits and reminded me of how good it is to laugh. I remember my Granmother telling me that during the war, they used newspaper because there wasn't any toilet paper. The good old days. Thank you for these little nuggets and I have to mention your wonderful artwork - so talented. Keep safe my friend.

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        2 months ago from AZ

        Great to see your comment Adnan, welcome back! I hope all is well. I am very glad to hear you enjoyed my poems. I appreciate it. Thank you. Stay safe and healthy.

      • HexAegon profile image

        Adnan 

        2 months ago from Earth, Universe

        Ha ha ha...a much needed humour at a time when the world feels more like a zombie apocalypse...Been a long time but finally back to Hubpages...and lo when you need some relief...you turn to Jason...I am glad you're safe and sound...keep knocking our doors with your pieces...and I hope good health keeps knocking your door... !!

      • Nicoartz profile imageAUTHOR

        Jason Nicolosi 

        2 months ago from AZ

        Thank you so much for your generous comment Fam. I really appreciate it. I hope you stay healthy and safe.

      • Syeda Sardar Fatima profile image

        Fam 

        2 months ago

        Hi Jason,

        I'm sure you are doing fine! I had mixed feelings while i read the poem, chuckled, laugh, got emotional with tears. I greatly appreciate your articles and writings. You are an amazing talent.

        I pray to God to get all of us out from this drastic testing time. Amin

        Stay safe & healthy!

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