Conditional Love

Updated on September 14, 2019
shanmarie profile image

Shannon is a passionate individual whose feelings and thoughts tend spill onto the pages, often in the form of poetry and sometimes essays.

After a hard loss, I decided to contend

That even unconditional love must sometimes end

Now, however, I can see clearly

Through a lens no longer blurred by painful memories

That for it to end defies its very definition

Of having no conditions

For, you see, love is a strong force

And it can be given freely unless, of course

It’s conditioned upon

What’s good for the one whose love has stopped


Questions & Answers

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      • shanmarie profile imageAUTHOR

        Shannon Henry 

        3 weeks ago from Texas

        Glad you've mostly gotten over it, Kari. It's not pleasant, but I suppose we've all experienced it at some point.

      • k@ri profile image

        Kari Poulsen 

        3 weeks ago from Ohio

        This is so true. I have experienced it for myself. Luckily I have (mostly) gotten over it.

      • shanmarie profile imageAUTHOR

        Shannon Henry 

        4 weeks ago from Texas

        I'm sorry you went through that, Denise. What you describe sure doesn't sound like love to me. Hopefully, you had your art to help you cope as you healed from that experience. Thanks for stopping by to comment.

      • PAINTDRIPS profile image

        Denise McGill 

        4 weeks ago from Fresno CA

        It is so sad when love is one-sided or conditional. My first husband didn't really love me but loved the idea of being married and he was horribly abusive to me. I didn't want to believe it that he could say he loved me had had multiple affairs but when I found out I had to leave. When there is only one of the couple living up to unconditional love, there is no love at all.

        Blessings,

        Denise

      • shanmarie profile imageAUTHOR

        Shannon Henry 

        2 months ago from Texas

        Hi, Brenda. Thank you for sharing your favorite line with me. I'm so glad you appreciate the poem.

      • Brenda Arledge profile image

        BRENDA ARLEDGE 

        2 months ago from Washington Court House

        This is a touching verse.

        "Through a lens no longer blurred by painful memories" is my favorite part.

        Great write.

      • shanmarie profile imageAUTHOR

        Shannon Henry 

        2 months ago from Texas

        Hi, Gypsy! Long time no see. Good to see you here! I hope all is well with you. Glad you enjoyed it.

      • Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

        Gypsy Rose Lee 

        2 months ago from Daytona Beach, Florida

        Lovely verse. Enjoyed.

      • shanmarie profile imageAUTHOR

        Shannon Henry 

        2 months ago from Texas

        Thanks, Ruby. I think that's true of real unconditional love.

      • manatita44 profile image

        manatita44 

        2 months ago from london

        'Softie' you. Ha ha.

        Have a great Sunday!

        Hi Ruby. Great to see you!

      • always exploring profile image

        Ruby Jean Richert 

        2 months ago from Southern Illinois

        Beautiful piece! To me, love is unconditional, and it lasts a lifetime.

      • shanmarie profile imageAUTHOR

        Shannon Henry 

        2 months ago from Texas

        Yes, makes me cry. Just kidding. Although that song is in my head now, I'm crying because I just diced an onion for the pico de gallo I made. The nachos are yummy, but the burning in my eyes won't stop. Stupid onion. Making me overly sentimental. LOL

      • manatita44 profile image

        manatita44 

        2 months ago from london

        A soft, sensitive … extremely beautiful piece!

      • shanmarie profile imageAUTHOR

        Shannon Henry 

        2 months ago from Texas

        Good to see you, Manatita.I hope you're feeling better. You reminded me of another song called "Wild as You" by Cody Johnson which has the narrator singing about a girl he loves who needs to be free. Your comment reminded me of the bridge where he sings about part of him wishing she'd settle down but the part of him that truly loves her is happy for her being who she is.

        "But you belong where the four winds blow

        Out where the untamed mustang roam

        Like a sweet summer rain passing through

        Never seen anything wild as you

        There's a part of me that prays

        That you'll hang up your wings someday

        But the part that truly does love you

        Always hopes you never do"

      • shanmarie profile imageAUTHOR

        Shannon Henry 

        2 months ago from Texas

        Sometimes, Eric, I suppose that's exactly what a husband and wife do. They just live it for better or worse.

      • manatita44 profile image

        manatita44 

        2 months ago from london

        Greetings, my Love. How are you? Nice poem but "chained melody."

        What's there to hold if the Melody is unchained? The Seer can hear it … that birthless and deathless unconditional Sound/Love. if you love something, set it free. Where is the loss or grief, then? This is almost impossible in human love.

        Conscious or unconscious bargaining/human need, is always there. Food for thought? Love you, Shannon. The positive is that we are always wiser after the experience. (Sweet chuckle, to you)

      • Ericdierker profile image

        Eric Dierker 

        2 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

        Really cool. I think I understand conditions on love. Nope I don't. After all I have put my wife through -- she would not even think about the term unconditional -- she just lives it or is that loves it?

        Anyhow great poetry.

      • shanmarie profile imageAUTHOR

        Shannon Henry 

        2 months ago from Texas

        Ooohhh....interesting answer, Bill. That's a good song candidate for one of Flourish Anyway's "Who Sang it Best" song hubs.

      • billybuc profile image

        Bill Holland 

        2 months ago from Olympia, WA

        I'm thinking of "Unchained Melody"...that's my answer to conditional love.

      • shanmarie profile imageAUTHOR

        Shannon Henry 

        2 months ago from Texas

        I just sent you a link on FB to the song I mentioned to Paula here.

      • abwilliams profile image

        A B Williams 

        2 months ago from Central Florida

        It is 'All We Are' by One Republic

      • shanmarie profile imageAUTHOR

        Shannon Henry 

        2 months ago from Texas

        Aw. . .thanks, Paula. No, it's not a song. Although, thanks for the vote of confidence. Maybe someday it will be put to music. The only problem is I need to meet someone else to do that. I have never put anything I wrote to music myself. It's always been done by someone else!

        Hmmm....I like your point of view. Yes, we can agree on that. I don't remember exactly what I was thinking about when I wrote this one. Not necessarily romantic love, although it probably makes the most sense, for most people, to apply it to that. I'd apply it to love in general. Not the run-of-the-mill expression of generalized fondness, but love between family members or close friends. Certainly, the love between a mother and her children qualifies. That may be the most truly unconditiional love humans have. There's very little a child can do that would make a mother walk away from her child and completely cut ties.

        Speaking of songs, maybe I should add that video I sent you the other day. Can't think of the name fo the song....the one where the singer says that if they break up he'll be breaking her family's heart as well...Oh. "More Hearts Than Mine". What do you think? LOL

      • shanmarie profile imageAUTHOR

        Shannon Henry 

        2 months ago from Texas

        Hi Angie. What song did I use? LOL.....I'm answering from the comment page instead of the hub itself. But I'm glad you like it. As for the short and sweet, I've been told those are my forte when it comes to poetry.

      • Lorna Lamon profile image

        Lorna Lamon 

        2 months ago

        Just lovely Shannon - all those emotions beautifully expressed.

      • fpherj48 profile image

        Paula 

        2 months ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

        Touching words....are they words to a song? If not, I'll bet they could be put to music successfully. What do you think?

        Business deals, contracts, requited favors, job proposals & other such things are "conditional" by their very contents........Love? No....not as far as I believe. Sure, love has a beginning and sometimes, an end,,,,also ups & downs.....but can we agree that saying "I love you, IF or but"......isn't expressing "love" at all.? Maybe for several other types of relationships and that's OK....but Love? Nah....that's the special & profound emotion that just IS. The very most all-consuming love being that between a mother and her children., IMHO.

        I suppose you are speaking here of romantic love? Ah...yes, I remember it well! Peace, Paula

      • abwilliams profile image

        A B Williams 

        2 months ago from Central Florida

        Great illustration.

        Great song.

        Short, sweet and poignant.

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