Cant Imagine

Can’t imagine how much

it hurts knowing that the

one she has counted on

for so long is no longer

there for her to talk to.

Noone can imagine how

much pain she is feeling

knowing that she has hurt

him this way, knowing

that she is the reason

they are no longer as

close as they once were.

She keeps wanting to reach

out to him, but she knows

that she can’t, because she

knows that he is no

longer there for her as

he used to be.

The pain of that

realization is almost

as unbearable as the

thought that she has

to face life from now

on without the one

that meant so much.

She knows that she

pushed to hard and

broke what they had

between them. She

knows that the loss

she is going through

is of her own making.

However, that does

not change how much

it is all hurting her

knowing that now the

one she has always

turned to the most is

no longer there for her

to call on when she

really needs him to be.

Stripping her of all the

security that she once

felt at his side, she

now feels so alone

and scared to even

exist without him.

Burning up inside

because she knows

that his pain is her

fault and has been

many times before.

Knowing that she

should just let him

walk away as he so

obviously intends to

do even after everything

they have been through

together and knowing that

she pushed him to make

such a final decision.

Knowing that her pain

Is her own fault

because in the end

she is the one who

made the mistakes

and drove him to push

her away and now she

knows that he may

never look back or

even think about her.

© 2020 Emily