Updated date:

All on me

Amani is a university student who loves writing. I have been writing since I was twelve. I love writing.

all-on-me

Being right never felt so wrong.. Yeah, I said it, and its actually scary or a word worse than scary.
And most of the times its actually the wrong that feels soo freaking right...
.
Sometimes I just want my heart to beat. Beat for you, like beat.. Really beat because you feel so right.. In my head life's really more than perfect... , And it does beat for you, only that if I told you about it I'd feel like I'm joking with you. And yes am afraid there wouldn't be an us anymore so I just sleep till I can't feel it beating anymore.
.
Sometimes I think I already let go of what I wanted... I want me to be wrong, I really do, but I look back and I have not be as happy as I did.. Feels like was flying, now there's just a few seconds between the tic and toc. I wanna be wrong but even my head can't fight me on this, no migraines about it.
..
. And then what I can't really figure out is " ITS ALL IN YOUR HEAD"..
I just don't get it, wrong- right... I can't.
.
Maybe its all in my head maybe.. I could be right for real. But it doesn't seem like it right now cause my head is pretty much in control of everything. I mean I talk to myself at times and I don't know why. Is even argue with myself.... I guess that's not normal.
.. And maybe its not in my head, maybe its not even there at all.....
. Not sure if I wanna be right or wrong in this one... But am really praying that its not all on me...

© 2020 Amani Utembu

Comments

Sankhajit Bhattacharjee from MILWAUKEE on December 30, 2020:

nice to read your narration....

Amani Utembu (author) from Nairobi -Kenya on December 29, 2020:

I will try let in people or atleast one person .... Thank you Brenda

BRENDA ARLEDGE from Washington Court House on December 29, 2020:

Reality hits hard. Sometimes one needs to speak the words, even if they are afraid they will come across jokingly.

No one can read your mind & a gal needs to know she is the most important person in your life.

Without knowing how you feel...she can only assume you don't really care.

Especially if you just sleep all the time.

It will be all on you if you keep quiet.

Stop being in control of everything & let someone share your life.

Take a leap of faith & make her your queen.

This is an awesome heartfelt write. I love how you can get in touch with these deep feelings.

Related Articles