Don't Need Those 'Stinkin Badges THE REAL HOUSEMEN OF RHODE ISLAND...Trouble in Paradise!

Updated on December 25, 2017

PHOTO OF NAMELESS "REAL HOUSEMEN OF RHODE ISLAND"

Just a bunch of nice guys from high school who grew up together and want to live in peace in a house together... They didn't know they were the new REAL HOUSEMEN OF RHODE ISLAND!!!!
Just a bunch of nice guys from high school who grew up together and want to live in peace in a house together... They didn't know they were the new REAL HOUSEMEN OF RHODE ISLAND!!!!

THE REAL HOUSEMEN OF RHODE ISLAND (YUP, YOU READ IT RIGHT!)

CHAPTER 1 -- REAL HOUSEMEN OF RHODE ISLAND: EPISODE 1 SYNOPSIS:

So I started checking into the courthouse hours last night... Got up early.. Called a taxi. Spent 50 bucks going to the police station for the for police reports and then down to the courthouse building and when we get there we find five or six other people like us that could not see a judge because the State failed to acknowledge they would be closed until Tuesday a completely wasted trip and then had to spend another $40 to get to work .

Pete was dropping us off from work and Kenny went up to unlock our doors. Pete leaves I go in the house put the leashes on the dogs and proceeded to walk them out. The minute I get outside on the porch my neighbor sends her daughter out at the same moment with the trash and I'm already in the driveway. She comes running out the French doors. And I'm wishing that those dogs better be on a leash or I'm going to call the cops (AGAIN).

"Are you and Dhrama alright? She asked with a touch of charm. "Did Jon bother you or touch you? By this time she is livid. How could I get stuck with such a messed up situation with my neighbor. Then she yells, "Don't worry Cracker, you're going to jail!"

I go in the house with my dogs and don't say a word to her, the bitch. I heard my roommates soothing voice saying, "...Just go in the house and she'll go into her house!"

Then why is she going down her hallway screaming (I can hear her!), then she's eating upstairs, not in the usual area she eats (I see). My sister was home and we started pounding on the walls all the way up the stairs! "Call the cops again and and beg them to come out," said loyal sis as she banged with all her might, out of breath and red sweaty face contorted in anger.

After we calmed down, smoked a joint in the cellar, we called the cops and one cop show up and wants to know why I called and when I informed him that the police officer the night before told me every time she starts that I am to call and file a report as did the last tenant.

"Officer," I said, out of sorts and effected by the pot. "She claims that she has a text from my phone to her last night! And it says I threaten to kill her and her children. They say they fear for their lives," I further explain, trying to be in control, even if deceptively.

"Calm down,l calm down," said the cop. He'd been to my house many times, and knew me well. He said I was a man with a 'magnet charm in game, he said campy and stupid."

"Not much I can do here. She's got to make a move. Right now I am the one looking bad. It's hard to stop and go about my fucking business," I said with no candor.

"Well, officer, I'd like to see this text and I would like him to see the text also and she starts yelling I don't have to show you everything on my phone we're going to let the judge see," I said. Indeed we are," I added. "Officer," I waited for him to acknowledge and nod. He did. I continued...

I'd like to have this woman arrested for making false reports and charges against me. And you guys can call call T-Mobile and they will tell you that when I went to jail for a suspended license overnight on Friday, somebody stole my phone," I said honestly. I saw his face and eyebrows change when i said 'went to jail".

I continued to plead my case as he stood in my living room. "My phone has been turned off and locked since the 16th of December while I wait for my new device to come in the mail."

Then I went to my desk and brought out some paperwork but he refused to read the 4 police reports from one of his supervisors and two other police officers stating how '...she's an instigator, they caught her for different lies regarding my wife being a pedophile!"

Now it's time to tell the cops that I come knocking on her windows everyday requesting sex from her 14 year old daughter and she's doing this via Facebook live and I didn't lie about this. this is one time I'm going to keep my cool! Pete is coming over tomorrow with two extra surveillance cameras we had leftover when we installed them on the new Love Shack we did last summer, and we will be stuck installing them facing her front door and the front yard and hooking them up to a separate computer...

"Officer, I would never want to play games with her, but.... (what I was really thinking was "She wants games, I'll show her games! This is not going to end well for a couple of people, I guarantee it . There are 3 things you d on't fuck with... 1. my family 2. My home, or 3. my wife).

Make it simple said Cousin Joe, "You gotta' show this backwoods inbred half-breed PuddinPop how we handle stuff...."

TO BE CONTINUED.... Just a little synopsis.

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: "https://letterpile.com/privacy-policy#gdpr"

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is used to quickly and efficiently deliver files such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisements has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)