Edit yourself - don’t limit yourself - your options are too vast to select only a few.
My Truth. My Art. My story.
Reasons why I never shared my writing:
- I didn't understand my pain enough to think anyone else would understand for me.
- I didn't think I would reach an audience.
- I was nervous for strangers to read about my darkest experiences before they met me.
- I didn't think my words were good enough to be on a public page.
- I was scared for my family to know I wasn't okay when I was telling them I was.
What held you back before you decided to share your literary artistic skills with strangers across the media? What did it feel like the first time someone responded to your work and left you feeling empowered to continue writing?
Putting the most vulnerable pieces of your heart in the hands and eyes of strangers to trust they will be as delicate and mindful of your thoughts as I am writing this now - opening yourself to such a closed off society we live in.
Humans - we are like a flower. You must water and feed the flower in order for it to grow and prosper to it's full potential - it must be given a certain amount of light a day. We too are just like a flower - we need light, we need to be fed goodness, and love to grow. This is what we need to surround ourselves with so we can achieve our fullest ability for our greatest potential to be seen.
I felt like the pain I was trying to heal from, alone, was my fault and maybe someone - whoever was reading it - could think of me as a wrongfully painted portrait. Not that I give a damn what you think of me, but I do care how I am seen as a woman. There’s a difference.
I want to talk about the things we hold inside. What we think we must hide from the world and kept from the hearts of our loved ones because we think maybe they couldn’t bare to hear our pain. Isn’t there already enough pain circulating amongst us? Why must we add more.
Sometimes we physically feel this self endured obligation to hide the bad parts about ourselves - like it would be that easy to forget as if they never existed within our skin and bones.
We have bad versions of ourselves through the cycle of time and some we wish to re-do ... but that would have created a different beam of color and light - reality and perhaps we would of found reasons to dislike the new reality as well. So, we get this. Now. Right now. If you choose to be unhappy in your NOW, well that’s why you’ve been given so many more days ahead of you.
Start with a simple change within yourself - redirect you perspective, open yourself to things you’ve never allowed in. Remove yourself from this comfort bubble you keep safely around you, as if, in reality it’s strong enough to keep everything out, forever.
I was asked today: "What are you most afraid of?"
I said, " Not being able to take a bad experience and turn it into art. Turning something sought through a broken perspective and turning it into something beautiful, painfully beautiful. In hopes that maybe someone can take it and positively effect their next step. Maybe they can bypass one more day avoiding getting hurt as I did."
This is why I share now.