Kenneth, born and raised in the South, resides in Hamilton, Alabama. He enjoys sharing his unique perspectives on life through his writing.
This Introduction has it's Roots
in the late 70s and throughout the 80s, when the Rage of The Age was being involved with a Trial Marriage. Those were (some) of the good old days as well as (some) of the most-painful days a person could have. At first glance, Trial Marriage looked and sounded great, but when it was put into action, the problems cropped up and just kept coming. It's no wonder that in these days, there was a bumper crop of lawyers who were lining-up to take on new business in the exercising of Divorce.
You remember the late, great Country Music queen, Tammy Wynette? She scored a mega-hit with her song, "D-I-V-O-R-C-E," and the snowball started to grow and today is still enlarging. I recall back in my younger days in the newspaper business, I knew of bright, successful women who filed for divorce simply because her husband asked her if she might cook him some delicious Southern Fried Chicken (once in awhile) and her lawyer argued that the husband was causing his client Marital Indifference and Mental Abuse. The score now reads . . . The wife - 1, the husband - 0.
Let's Have a Serious Discussion About
dating from the earliest of (this) social exercise, to the most-current evolution that today is called "Relationships." One thing I beg you to remember: every Relationship was once a kind, sincere, and romantic Date with someone of the opposite sex.
Why is it, do you suppose, that once a young man meets the girl that causes his heart to beat extra hard, he becomes a tray of strawberry Jell-O? He is enamored with this vixen who simply shakes her head around bringing her long blond hair around her neck and he almost faints. Then a light bulb goes off. He has an idea: he just has to take her out on date. Upon asking this beautiful girl for a date and after a reasonable amount of the two getting to know each other, he shaves twice, buys the best wardrobe in the store (shoes included) and upon their first date which sets the tone for their future relationship, he is on his best behavior--he watches what he says. He treats her with the utmost courtesy and is doing what all men are trying to do: win her heart for a long-lasting relationship.
My thoughts on this: if two people like each other, then why the pretense? Face it, men and women. When you two are in your Early Dating Stages, you both exert a lot of acting--on things you say that you like, but hate namely a film that makes you nauseated, but your date likes it and to make your date happy, you act as if the film can win an Oscar. Am I right? The only Oscar you may be vying for is how convincing you might be in your First Days of Dating.
The Days of your Early Dating can be trying. I am talking about those times when the male and female hormones are going wild and you and your date are parked in your convertible sitting near a pretty lake in the country on a perfect June night when the aroma of honeysuckle of wafting through the air--you know all about this moment, don't you, married people? But you choose to remain pure until you are married. Did you know that "this" practice still exists? It's called self-discipline and it's designed for the other part of the dating duo to see that you can abstain from your fleshly lust.
My thoughts on this: I respect anyone who wants to wait until marriage to have sex. I am not just saying this to get a laugh. Call me old fashioned. Call me behind the times. But I know of several couples who are still married today who live in my neighborhood who "waited" for marriage before sex entered their marriage. And I can tell you another thing: they are still happy.
Now, boys and girls, would you like to talk about Trial Dating? I mean, you've already lived through Trial Marriage, and since you are an enlightened society smarter than those with an average college I.Q., you should just open up to what's with Trial Dating and maybe you can enlarge your scary I.Q. And if you fail to learn anything, you can always turn to another hub and take up residence with that writer. I mean, anything's possible if you know how to stop being afraid of Walt Disney or Stan Lee.
Trial Dating Facts:_______________________________
- Trial Dating is the prototype and forerunner of Trail Marriage. I truly think that back in the late 80s and early 90s, if the people who jumped over Trial Dating and set their sights on being in a Trial Marriage only to divorce two and a half years later--had just did the work and stayed after class with Trial Dating, well, "those" pitiful souls might be happy today in 2018.
- Trial Dating really starts and stops with our minds and depending on our mental prowess, we can be pioneers of the greatest, most-simple and joyful way to live, or just flunk out because you have too many questions (and not enough living) that you didn't let yourself grow as a human being.
- Trial Dating is only a small step from being (I hate to say it), "Friends," but without Benefits. That is another story way too controversial for me to tackle right now. But relax. Look into your mind and see the difference with Trial Dating and Friends. To me, a friend is someone we see at work or in church, but someone who is in a Trial Dating Experiment is someone who (is learning how) to fulfill our romantic needs as well as our mental needs as well. Even the terms, Trial Dating and Friends are very different. But . . .when two people are Trial Dating they were first Friends and then the train ride began. I've even known of two people who were just curious and jumped into a Trial Dating Experiment and began to hate the other partner until they simply started liking each other and talking to each other on a regular frequency, slowly became friends.
- Trial Dating is much like Romantic Dating, but without the gifts that the man is wired to buy for the pretty girl that he is romancing. I say that society in its early stages, wrote the formula for a male to pay attention to the pretty female and when this happened, something very strong and invisible happened: the two began to like each other as friends and then came Romantic Dating and you know the rest. Trial Dating can give the participants the freedom that they want, but with a few guidelines that has to be kept if the two want to carry on a set time of trial dating.
- If the couple who are Trial Dating are out in public and some smart alec says to them, "Uhhh, I thought that you two were on a hot date," either one can sharply reply: "Sorry, 'Know-It-All! We are only Trial Dating!" And the smart alec's mouth is now numb from the comeback.
The Study of The Trial Prefix
in olden times, was respected in the majority of educational institutions. Even the most-ragged and vile rebel who lived on his "chopped hog," drank whiskey like it was Pepsi and fought everyone who was different than him, had a degree of respect for the Prefix. When "this" "hog"-riding, whiskey-drinking, two-fisted, bare-knuckle fighter hit the town, a man in his 40s would walk when the traffic light was red and upon the man and "rebel's" eyes meeting, the man nodded and the rebel said, "yes, sir." Those, my friends, were the good old days.
Now with the evidence of Common Etiquette and Respect being swept underneath the floor, things like Respect among each other; Personal property and Speed limits to name a few, what chance did the Prefix have against these forces that were more powerful as any Tsunami and more dangerous as any gang of Hell's Angels have? Not one if you are looking for me to be honest.
Let's look at a few Accepted Prefixes: Trial Marriage, Trial Separation, Trial subscription--I would talk of more, but the tears of sadness keep flooding my eyes.
So I am Standing Here to ask
Why not Trial Work? You agree to work for a company for an agreed-upon time and this agreement is signed by the employee and employer and if the two cannot find productivity or happiness with the arrangement, just leave. Shake hands, first. You are not a barbaric ape!
And if we continue to keep on this scary trend of everything accompanied with a "Trial," I have just talked about Trial Work, so to go with that silly idea, what about a Trial Termination? That's right. Do it right. Have a disgruntled employee meet with the boss, his department supervisor, the company Trial Lawyer (pun intended), and the Human Resources manager to read over and sign a pile of Trial Termination Papers that will tell the upset employee that he will not come on the company premises for at least four months without pay and in this time, he may seek other companies that are promoting Trial Employment . . .I guess that instead of Probation, we will start using Trial Termination.
Why not Trial Housework? This should be so popular for both the husband, wife and kids. It works pretty much on the same basis as Trial Work, but if the parties are not doing their part or not happy with the Trial Agreement, I suggest that you re-negotiate the Trial Work Contract.
Why not Trial Arrests? Think about it! With our police forces being pushed to the max in our bigger cities, the cops barely have time to go out and follow-up on a complaint much less arrest a law-breaker and keep them in jail before a slick lawyer hauls him (or her) before a judge and they are set free on a technicality. So we let our Federal, State, and Municipal Legislators write a few sensible laws about Trial Arrests and that way, the cops' job will be so much easier. A cop catches a thief and he is Trial Arrested for one week and if he behaves himself, he is set free. But if he starts trouble, he (or she) is reprimanded and kept for a Real Arrest with a Real Trial and more Real Jail Time.
Then you have Trial School--which is going to go over with our young people like an Arizona road-runner. At the proper age, I say 12, not six, the parents register their children and the school officials read the Trial School and Education System to all parties and in two years or less if the teacher finds that the children are not there to learn, but talk and kill time, the teachers can employ a Trial Expel to see if this agreed on time away from school doesn't teach the lazy children to learn if they want to get a Trial Job.
And this one is my very favorite: Trial Physical Exercise--my dreams as well as yours will come true if you and I can get the right people with the right connections to pass laws "for" you and I, the people who cannot stand to run on a treadmill for half an hour while sweat pours on our bodies. All we have to do is sign-up for this fabulous invention and we can laugh and have a great time with No running in place, push-up's, set-up's and none of that silly deep knee bends. Yukkk!
With all of these new ideas and thoughts that I have discovered, I just wonder what will happen when we as a society will pass laws so we can have Trial Death. I just cannot figure out how the ones who will be giving us a Trial Funeral and Burial and then Bringing us Back to (a) Trial Life.
And if these prefix notions do not get off the ground, we can always get in touch with the good, old Trial Lawyers.
© 2018 Kenneth Avery