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My Personal Thoughts After Watching the Popular Show "13 Reasons Why"

Missy is a unique writer who enjoys inviting her readers into her thoughts through her poetry and other topics of discussion.  

my-personal-thoughts-after-watching-the-popular-show-13-reasons-why

How I Decided to Watch This Show

The poem at the end of this essay came to me and was inspired oddly enough by the show that has reached Netflix called “13 Reasons Why.”

I was reluctant to watch this series, because I am 45 years old now, and it seemed to be a young adult show with plenty of scenes of high school crushes and parties. I was obviously not going to be into that type of re-creation anymore.

However, out of the blue one day, my fate pushed play on this show after several reviews I had read on social media; some from teenagers, and surprisingly some from adults. I thought it had to be something that maybe had a valid script with lessons to be learned or at least inspiration to life. Inspiration is something I have always tried to find through my own journey through time. It became a necessity for me somewhere along the way for survival purposes.

Hannah Baker Played by Katherine Langford

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As I continued to watch show after show, I realized how much things do not change when you are growing up and cast out into the public-school system. I have a teenager myself now, and I knew this already. However, she is somewhat different than I was in my confused years. Which is a funny way for me to describe that time, because life never really becomes crystal clear, does it? Even so, schools have the same protocol of the mean jocks, the nerds; the Goth; and the normal misunderstood, as the main characters were in this story of Hannah Baker and Clay Jensen.

I, myself, started recalling my past as a high-school student, and how difficult the years were for me - the strange thing was; I did not relate to one specific character here, but a few in different types of ways.

I related to Hannah for her undeniably bad luck at keeping dedicated friendships, and how lonely that can make a person feel. I did not, however, relate to her giving up on life and ending her own. Even though, I understood the velocity of circumstances, which could lead-up to that - the things we go through that happen to us, and live with us even as we make it to adulthood. Some of us are stronger than others and learn to block those things out. In that way, I related to the character of Skye Miller (Goth girl), who stated that "only the weak would give into suicide." Those are the thoughts, I, to this day, bury in my psyche when life just seems to overwhelm and remind me of who I am.


Clay Jensen Played by Dylan Minnette

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Continuing the Comparisons

In continuance through this series, I related to Jessica Davis at one point. This was my least favorite character; the popular one that plays the blame game for her own insecurities. Well, that was the way I saw her. Even so, I did relate to her after the scene of her party. I will not go into detail to what happens to her, but will say – unfortunately, experiences are the same for some of us during those sad years of youth.

There were plenty of kids like Justin Foley, that I knew, who had a less than normal home life, and covered it up with athletic success and rich friendships. I know this type still exists today as well.

All in all, this movie brought back memories and sprang me forward to realize my own life past and present. It is the paths we take and sometimes the bad choices we make that carry our luck through the years. I realized the adolescent years are one of the most crucial parts of life that can create our futures, and it can be so sad for some. I hope I have had plenty of talks with my own daughter about these types of pressures right now at her age. I think I have, because she really is a very grounded, and a kind person. Although I know she has parts of herself and her life in high school that she also struggles with. In this way, I related to Hannah’s mom.

Hannah’s mom was not bad. She cared so deeply for her daughter, and tried her best to help her in any way she could. She worried about her. She doted on her, and encouraged her through every interest Hannah had. She didn’t put any pressure on her, and then she wondered if she didn’t do enough. And that is the scariest part. Now, at this age, this is where I am at in life with my own children. Knowing all that may happen privately in their lives, and realizing that I can only be there if they let me, but darn it…I will keep trying every day, even if they don’t want me to.

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My Ending Views and My Personal Poem

My poem is about life as, I, and I assume more people out there in this great big world, know it - forever trudging through with complete awareness of knowing who we are, but not being appreciated for individuality. Yes, I know there are many of us here, and I believe that this show inspired me to write all this down today, because the teenage years are supposed to mold us. They are crucial to our choices regarding the future. It is told to us that going to school, learning, and making friendships help us grasp our journey to adulthood. Yeah, but for some of us, it only creates further distortion to our reality. Confusion sets in and never leaves. It is sad but true.

Take care everyone. Learn to love yourself. Enjoy the little things in life and forget the aspirations that others may have for you. Believe in yourself and don’t conform to society in a way that is unhealthy to your own beliefs. And if any of you teenagers are out there reading this; if you don’t want to be like a Bryce Walker or Courtney Crimson, don’t be. Be like a Clay Jensen; a person who even though was misunderstood, still validated life by being himself. In the long run, find your pockets of happiness and fight through the rest.

my-personal-thoughts-after-watching-the-popular-show-13-reasons-why

"A person's character, I realize, is never black-and-white. There is so much gray."

~13 Reasons Why Quote

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A Question for Adults and Teens

The Curse of a Life

When I look into the mirror,

I don’t care for what I see…


There stares a tired old hag

looking back at me…


She is distorted in a swirl

of gray…


Succumbed to her lost private

Observatory…


Eyes wide, beauty to be

seen…


nevertheless, all she views is

her lack of pristine…


Once a mystical goddess…


oh, who am I kidding-she

never was…


Though she did once turn

herself into a suicide blonde…


and took on the world with

her new-found charm…


She flowed like rays of

sunshine in her hair…


it brightened her face, and

the cold stares were now not

there…


A new kaleidoscope of pretty

colors…


A purposeful perspective shining

within her…


Transformed into a peacock who

fanned out her fair…


even though she was hiding

much despair…


Then, these things had to

change…


they had to go back to the same-old

thing…


Pushed in by past lows; words of

unfavorable persuasions… Lost once more in darkness. A remembered dread…


Shadows are her friends in this old atmosphere… Sometimes now, when she perfumes her skin…


she can still only smell her death living within… Will she eventually prevail out

again…


Will she bury her regrets, and forgive her own sins… Back and forth finding light,

and later disappointment…


returned her completely to the night…

© 2017 Missy Smith

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