Men and the Empathic Woman
As you know, an empathic woman is loving and caring. It is her hypersensitive nature that can be a burden in relationships, and that leave men helpless. Why is it that men are unable to meet the challenge of loving an empath?
Empaths are Honest
An empath will always be honest. Empaths feel obligated to tell the truth.
I have dealt with scenarios such as:
A male friend of mine, in high school, cheated on his girlfriend. I told him that he should tell her the truth before someone else does. He told her, and she broke up with him. It was her obligation to do so. Not telling someone the truth takes their choice out of their hands. The choice that they have every right to make.
Most recent was a client who was told by me to stay off of his cell phone and get to work. I, later, told his supervisor, that "yes, he was on his cell phone, and I had been telling him that if it is a temptation he should put the cellphone in his locker." He did not particularly want to do that.
Desire for committed relationship
Empaths are true romantics, who are not interested in flings and one night stands. Empaths want to connect on a deep and meaningful level. Many "boys" do not want this kind of commitment - preferring to jump from bed to bed, and relationship to relationship. If this is what you want, cross me off your conquest list.
Due to these kinds of "boys" - preferring flings and lying to empaths about the level of commitment that they have for us - I was in a relationship from February 2015 - October 2017 where the relationship was not consummated. Many "boys" before this relationship, lied to get what they wanted. Now, I will wait out a commitment before I fall for that again. Men wanted. Boys stay away.
Empaths form very deep connections to people around them. Every encounter is intense and meaningful. Most people cannot handle this intensity.
Scenarios I have had personally:
I remember my first OB/GYN appointment when I was pregnant with my first child. Due to this, I remembered a comment that my doctor made. "When a woman is pregnant, their cervix turns blue." When my now ex-husband was studying for his NCLEX (Nursing license exam) Exam with a friend, his friend read a question pertaining to this. I answered blue. My ex-husband answered pink. I was right. I, then, got into a discussion about our first OB appointment with our first child. He did not remember the conversation. I did.
This is probably why I am known to have a good memory. Because I make a lot of my life meaningful. I don't know how others live without meaning.
Everything happens for a reason.
Ask too many questions
Empaths are interested in the details. Most men don't want to share and think about the details. They don't want to feel like they are being interrogated.
I do have a social work degree. Interviewing skills are part of the curriculum.
See the best and worst in people
Men that have a dark side. Deal breaker. If you have a dark side, don't try with an empath.
Know what they want
Men tend to like many things done their way, which is why some men don't like strong women. An empath is completely sure of what she wants in her life. She won't change her mind, so this may become a burden to the men in the relationship.
Empaths want partners who will satisfy them physically as well as emotionally. Unfortunately, some men are only interested in the physical. It has to be both or nothing for the empath.
An empaths true commitment can be often perceived as neediness. Most men are not prepared to date only one woman and commit to only her. An empath only ever wants a committed monogamous relationship. They do not invest in flings or one night stands.
Consistency and Reliability
An empathic woman has every aspect of her life planned. She does not like taking risks. She wants consistency, who follows plans, and reliability.
Empaths have strong morals which they follow. They cannot be with a partner who does not have the same values and morals that they do.
During my marriage, when my now ex-husband was trying to pass his NCLEX exam, he did not pass it until the third time. After taking the exam the 2nd time, he failed to tell his command that he had not passed the test to get his nursing license. Which means he was working at Portsmouth Naval Hospital without a license. I kept telling him to tell his command before he gets into more trouble. When they found out, they told him, "you have one more chance to pass the exam, if you do not, you will be kicked out of the Navy." He did pass it the third time, and remained in the Navy.
Nothing that I said ever cut through my ex-husband's façade. That's on him. Not on me. You think you know someone, and you just find out you never knew each other at all. Guess all the military deployments hid that from both of us, because we ended up having three children together.
Guess the bottom line is, some men cannot understand the empath wanting to be in a committed relationship while being independent. However, this is true for all women empaths.
Some men just do not like strong women. Empaths are stronger than one thinks. Therefore, if you do not want a deep and meaningful relationship, don't start one with an empath. Because that is all an empath is searching for.