Life as a plus size teen isn't really easy, but I'm gonna share my story with you with hope's that it will help someone out there
My Life as a plus size teen : School edition
Hi, I'm Adesola, from Nigeria and I want to share my story with you. Please accommodate me if this article is not as good as you'll like it to be. I just want people to know about being plus size in the world we live today.
My story obviously starts from the womb. I wasn't really born a normal child but it never affected me, I was born with six fingers but the extras were cut at birth but I was never really affected. I grew up a normal child with my older brother (My best friend). But everything started to change when I was in the higher class of primary school. I didn't really know what was happening exactly, I was just a naive little child. My friends made fun of me but I never really thought much of it, I just thought we were all having fun, guess not.
It became worse in secondary school, the boys in my school were quite mean. I was bullied for being fat, I was even called a bag of rice and it hurt a lot. I was in the same school as my brother but we kinda had our own different lives so he couldn't be there for me all the time. I kinda learned to deal with the insults, and luckily I had some good friends with me ( some were actually boys). But that still didn't stop me from crying every single time someone commented on my weight. I always had this stupid mentality that when I get to the university I would become slim instantly, so I never really controlled my eating habits ( if only I knew). I decided to become a tom boy at a young age because I thought I wasn't pretty enough to be a girl because I was fat. Things got better along the way except from some of my classmates that refused to change and a particular teacher that derived joy in commenting about people's weight.
Then university came and things kinda changed, I was getting attention from boys that I never got before and it honestly surprised me. I gradually started feeling like an actual girl till I realized that most of the guys didn't like me for me, they only liked me because of my packages and it hurt me a lot, mostly my confidence. My hurt became so bad that I had suicidal thoughts, I had no confidence, my insecurities increased a hundred percent and it was dreadful. It got to a point that crying was my favorite pass time.
Everyday I go out, I feel very insecure, always thinking about my body, thinking ''your body is so gross, its gonna be hard for anybody to love you'' every single day. I go to shops to afraid to go to the sweet section because people will think that the fat girl is going to buy sweets to get fatter. I always feel like everyone is judging me, but I learnt about this thing called self love and its the thing we plus size people need right now.
I won't lie to you, self love is very hard, you won't get it immediately, but gradually you'll learn to love yourself and when you do, no one would be able to bring you down, even I myself haven't gotten self love but I'm gonna keep at it till people's words can't hurt me anymore. I've started working on myself, the change is little but its there and gradually it'll get better.
If you're reading this and you're in my same situation, it'll get better, just have faith and practice self love.
If you want to read more, I'm writing another one : FAMILY EDITION
© 2020 Adesola