Karen Hellier is a freelance writer and eBay entrepreneur. She lives happily in the mountains of North Georgia with her husband and her dog.
Once upon a time, a young girl was in a Christian singing group in high school. The girls wore long gowns, and the boys wore tuxedos. The conductor of the group also wore a tuxedo. There were lights, sound, and even a multimedia show that was part of the group's appearances. The group toured New England and even went to Europe singing their hearts out for the Lord. Many people's lives were touched by this group and their message of Christ's love for them. The young girl was so happy to be able to be part of such a special group and to bring such an important message to the world. She never felt closer to the Lord than when she was singing for him. Eventually, the girl grew up and went away to college. The Director left to start his own business which involved a lot of traveling. New directors came and went. New singers came and went. And twenty-eight years later, there was a reunion...
As you probably guessed, I am the girl in the story. The reunion of the New Life Singers was held in July of 2004. Many of the singers hadn't seen each other for 25 - 30 years. It was a heady experience to be all together again, and practice songs that the group used to sing so many years ago. There were pictures in scrapbooks that were shared, love, laughter, song, and much Christian fellowship. When the weekend was over, some of the singers who were still local decided to get together once per month and sing for old times sake. And I noticed the director...noticed much more about him than his musical directing abilities...!
By the following April, everyone met for dinner, and about one week later, I had my first date with the man who had been the director of the group. We were both going through a divorce at the time. We got together for dinner, and it was amazing to me that we had an absolutely wonderful time. You can tell from the picture that there is an age difference, but we didn't notice it. And we still don't. All I noticed was how blue his eyes were, and that I didn't want to let go of his hand all through dinner. In fact, although I am right handed, I held his left hand with my right hand all the way through dinner and ate with my left hand...not an easy feat believe me. I just didn't want to let go. And although we have had our challenges, we have been together ever since.
My First Marriage
I had been through a marriage that I thought was going to be good but hadn't paid attention to the signs beforehand. And as the children came along my first husband grew further and further away from me, so it was as though I was bringing the children up by myself. After 17 years, we divorced. Although I still believed in marriage, I believed in marriage to someone who was the right match for me. My first husband and I were not the right match.
The thing about Chuck was that I already knew him. I knew what kind of person he was...kind, loving, intelligent, generous, funny, and not someone who would hurt my children. I knew we had the same religious beliefs too. We were able to jump ahead in the dating period and skip all the "tell me about yourself" conversations that couples who just start out usually have. Ours, was more of the "catch me up on what's been happening in your life" type of conversation and "how are the families"? It was a comfort to be with someone who knew me way back when, and still liked me anyway! But If you had told me back then so many years ago that we would end up together someday I would have told you that you were crazy! I had not known then that he would turn out to be the love of my life.
There was the fear in the beginning that he would hurt me. So, after a few short months when things were going really well, I got scared and told him the deepest secrets about myself that I thought might chase him away. I decided if this wasn't going to work out, I wanted to know right away before I got in too deep. In fact, I remember crying one night when I told him one of my biggest faults. It did not chase him away, and in fact, he told me that everything was going to be fine and we would work it out. He was right.
Finally Together Forever
After five years of dating, we got married. The wedding was the best day of my life...except for the days, my children were born. Although when I think about it, there was pain in those days and there was no pain on our wedding day. There was only pure joy that this man and I had found each other...again, and were committing the rest of our lives together.
We had lots of formal wedding photos and candid photos taken to remember this special day, and every time I look at them, especially the candid ones, I see our love all over again, expressed in our eyes. He is the most romantic man I have ever met. He sends me flowers, takes me out for romantic dinners, takes me on wonderful vacations including an annual cruise.
He is very honest with me, and although he loves to kid around, he keeps the lines of communication open. I'm not saying we don't have disagreements, but when we do, we are always able to talk them out. He is a wonderful provider and loves his work which is something I highly admire about him. He treats me like a queen, which is something that I have never had before.
A Soul Connection
Although we do have friends that are single, I want to fix them all up so that they can have the amazing relationship that we are having. But I realize that this is a very unusual experience. We are very connected to each other, and not everyone is blessed enough to have that. Sometimes one of us will pick up the phone to call the other one, and a call is coming in from the other person. I don't think I ever really believed in soul mates, but now that I am with Chuck and in this relationship, I feel our souls have a connection. If one of us is having a bad day, all we have to do is sit next to each other on the couch, or hold hands, or hug, and all the negativity of the day disappears, and all is right in our world again. We have helped each other deal with divorces, a cancer diagnosis, a heart attack, challenges with our children, and it has all brought us closer. And although our lives would have been easier without those challenges, there is no one else I would have rather gone through them with.
The Age Difference
The age difference does affect us in one small way. I think we appreciate each other more because we know our marriage, not a first for either of us, is time-limited. We don't have the expectations of a young couple getting married in their twenties. We don't have expectations that we will reach our 50th anniversary. It is a reminder of how blessed we are to have found each other again, and that we need to cherish each other as much as we can now because we don't know how much time we have left. And we plan to make the most of every minute.
Connect with Someone From Your Past and it May Brighten Your Future
So, my suggestion to anyone reading this that is looking for a soul mate is to look back into your own past. Is there someone that got away? Is there someone you used to date that you would love to reconnect with? There's no time like the present to pick up the phone or look for them on Facebook. Maybe they are happily married and the two of you will just have a nice conversation. Or, maybe they are looking for their soul mate as well, and it is the perfect time for the two of you to reconnect. You just never know until you give it a try.
© 2012 Karen Hellier
Margie's Southern Kitchen from the USA on February 09, 2018:
Love your story, you make a beautiful couple! Many more years of happiness together!
Karen Hellier (author) from Georgia on March 17, 2013:
Yes it is...and it's true, which is the best part!
Nicholl McGuire from Los Angeles County on March 14, 2013:
Just love a good story!
Karen Hellier (author) from Georgia on October 06, 2012:
Thanks so much.We are very happy together.
onlinehubber from New Jersy, United States on October 05, 2012:
Adorable. you look great together. You weeding pics we too good as well. thanks for sharing your love story with us here. Cheers and congratulations.
Karen Hellier (author) from Georgia on July 24, 2012:
Thanks for reading and commenting. He is wonderful and I have never felt more loved. I think older men appreciate women more. I know he sure appreciates me more than anyone else ever has. Thanks for the comment on the wedding photo. It was the happiest day of my life!
Victoria Lynn from Arkansas, USA on July 24, 2012:
What a wonderful story! I've heard of people reconnecting later in life. He sounds wonderful. I love your wedding photo, too. Nice looking couple. Thanks for sharing your story!
Karen Hellier (author) from Georgia on June 03, 2012:
Well, congratulations to you and your husband. It's amazing to reconnect with people from our past and find the feelings are still there. I read a book on it once and it was so great to read about couples who found each other again. Thanks for reading and commenting. I am going over to your profile page to find those hubs you wrote right now!!!
Karen Hellier (author) from Georgia on June 03, 2012:
You are m welcome. It was a pleasure to write. I love a happy, romantic story, and ours is one. Sounds like your is as well? Thanks for reading.
hair bender on May 30, 2012:
My husband and I had a love affair when we were 13 and 14 and we reconnected after 27 years. We have been married for 9 years now. I also wrote some hubs on it as well.
Lohrainne Janell from Fairfield, IA on May 30, 2012:
Beautiful story! Very inspiring and full of love kind of Hub! Thank you for sharing it!
Karen Hellier (author) from Georgia on May 20, 2012:
Thanks for reading and for your kind comment.Yes, it is that way for the 2 of us. We are truly blessed!
Angela Joseph from Florida on May 19, 2012:
Congratulations, Karen! You know what they say, love is lovelier the second time around. It certainly seems that way for you two. May God continue to bless and prosper your marriage.
Karen Hellier (author) from Georgia on May 09, 2012:
We have a lot in common! Good for you that you are about to marry Mr. Right this time. It makes all the difference in the world to find that person that loves you unconditionally. Congratulations!Yes, the Lord is good, and we are both blessed!
supermom_in_ny from NY on May 09, 2012:
That is so sweet. Isn't the Lord good?! I also married Mr. Wrong. It all worked out because now I am about to marry someone that loves me no matter what. Been through ups and downs and I am going to spend the rest of my life with him. ;)
Karen Hellier (author) from Georgia on March 25, 2012:
I am very glad for both of us the second time around. We are blessed and we know it! Why don't you write a similar hub about how you met you second husband? I would love to read it...and include pictures. Some of my more romantic hubs are the best read ones I have! People love a good romance story...especially one that's true!
Lisa Kroulik from Minnesota on March 25, 2012:
So this is your story! You brim with happiness in your pictures. Congratulations on finding someone so special. I know I'm pretty thrilled with marriage the second time around.
Karen Hellier (author) from Georgia on March 17, 2012:
Thanks so much. I can't believe how blessed I am.
Laurie Festa on March 16, 2012:
Karen This is beautiful,and I am so very happy for you!
Karen Hellier (author) from Georgia on February 20, 2012:
Thanks ziyena. I am blessed.
ziyena from the United States on February 20, 2012:
This is so very special! Congratulations ... again :)
Karen Hellier (author) from Georgia on February 19, 2012:
Thank you for your kind wishes. I agree with you, going through what we have gone through in the past makes us appreciate each other more, and we are more forgiving. I didn't think it was possible to be this happy in a marriage. Thanks for commenting.
Isabella Mukanda from Fort Myers on February 18, 2012:
Hey Karen, he sure is good-looking (handsome)! I wish you two the best in your new marriage and I pray that things work out really well. I would suppose that with the experience both of you have had, your relationship will probably be better. And I say, may the sad memories of relationships gone wrong be forgiven and forgotten, because you are all having to deal with entirely new people and as time goes on, hopefully you will forgive the flaws and find more to appreciate by choice, instead. Be blessed my dear sister.