From Yesterday to Today: You Can't Always Get What You Want

Updated on May 13, 2020

A New Series

So I’m kicking around this idea.

I’m thinking this might be done in coordination with a weekly podcast.

Part of the reason why my proposed podcast has been delayed for so long is because I couldn’t decide what the central theme would be. I think I finally accomplished that goal.

Let’s see how it goes. Of course, this is just practice. I haven’t made the Podcast yet. Call it a teaser if you will.

My home
My home

Welcome to the Porch

The brilliant writer and philosopher, Leo Buscaglia, stated that the most important moments in his life were centered around the family dinner table, for it was there that he learned about love from his large, Italian family.

For me It was the front porch of a post-war brick home, Tacoma, Washington, during the 50’s and 60’s, and the lessons were about love and life. Some of them were spoken. Some were taught through actions. All were absorbed by a painfully shy, slightly-dorky, adopted kid, the son of Evelyn J. and Dale L. Holland.

Me!

I’d like to invite you to join me on that front porch, a time-travel sort of thing, back to my childhood.

Pull up a chair and get comfortable. It’s a pleasure having you join me.

Funny Thing

It’s a funny thing about learning lessons as a kid. Very few monumental lessons about life are classified, at the time they occur, as being terribly important. They happen, we might give them ten seconds of our consideration, and then something else happens to capture our rather flighty attention and we move on with the business of being a child. So it was for me. My parents, my sister, my extended family, they were all teaching me about life daily, and obviously I learned from those lessons or we wouldn’t be having this front porch discussion, but at the time of the lesson it was like cherry blossoms falling in the breeze, lovely to look at but not likely to quicken the heartbeat of a ten-year old.

Today I look back and realize just how lucky I was. It could have gone in a terribly different direction, as I mentioned in my memoir “And the Blind Shall See.” I was given up for adoption at birth. Seventy years later I discovered information about my birth mother, and her life, and the lives of her other three children, and that information told of tragic lives ending in tragic ways, lives of addiction and crime and incarceration, all of which I was spared by the adoption. So I was lucky, and every single day of my youth was a gift, but at the time it just seemed like an average childhood lived by an average child.

I know better now!

My rock, my father!
My rock, my father!

My Parents

My adopted parents were hard-working people. They were Midwest survivors of the Great Depression and World War 2, no-nonsense people who believed that hard work was the solution to all ills. There was absolutely nothing, at first glance, noteworthy about them, two people among hundreds-of-millions in the U.S. at that time. They had grabbed their modest slice of the American Dream in the City of Destiny, Tacoma, and there they lived out their lives, building upon a legacy given to them by their parents, and preparing to leave their own chapter in that legacy.

When they adopted, me my Dad was twenty-nine and Mom twenty-six. My sister, Darlys, from my mom’s first marriage, was eleven.

And little Billy Holland made four!

I was shy. I was quiet. I watched, I listened, and I learned, and what I learned is the impetus for this series of articles, and possibly podcasts, by the same name.

You Can’t Always Get What You Want

Can you hear The Stones singing their song of loss and wisdom?

God I loved baseball! It was the sport my dad played with me when he got home after work, going back to me being maybe three or four years of age. He would get home, clean up, we would have dinner, and then we’d grab our gloves, a bat, and a ball, and outside we would go, him teaching me to catch, to throw, and to hit. Those were magical times for a young boy looking to carve out a foothold on life, serious bonding times with the man I adored, a man and his son, standing under the setting sun, brilliant blue skies turning to gray, the warm breezes ruffling our hair. I swear to the gods if I close my eyes now, six-plus decades later, I can almost hear the distinct sound of a ball hitting the pocket of that leather glove, and I can almost see my dad’s smile as his son corrals another grounder and fires a strike to first base.

I was determined to be a Major League baseball player. I could close my eyes, as a young kid, and see myself firing fastballs by Mickey Mantle as he flailed helplessly with his bat. Strike one, strike two, strike three, and the Mick would doff his hat in my direction and walk, subdued, back to the dugout, put in his place by the young southpaw with a gap-toothed grin.

I slept with my baseball glove. Honest to God, I did. I would play catch with anyone willing to give me ten minutes of their time, and if there was no one around I would go outside and fire strikes against the concrete wall that bordered our property.

But it was not meant to be!

It was not meant to be
It was not meant to be

The Painful Reality

The percentage of kids who actually make it to the Big Leagues is ridiculously small, and there’s a reason for that: to be a professional in any sport, you have to be ungodly good. I wasn’t. I was a good Little Leaguer. I was a good high school player.

I just wasn’t ungodly good!

The reality of that fact hit me one April afternoon of my senior year of high school. We were playing some team out of Seattle, I was tabbed as the starting pitcher, and I got destroyed. It was like everything I threw, they were expecting. It was like the fireworks on the 4th of July, that’s how badly I was lit up by that other team . . . single, double, single, homerun, double, on and on it went for four long, painful innings, seven runs total, twelve hits, every single ball hit hard. Finally the coach pulled me and, with head hung in shame, I walked back to the dugout and realized the pros were not in my future.

I was still moping about it when I got home that night, and Dad put up with my whining for about five minutes.

“Let’s go outside, Bill, and talk about the game.”

It was a beautiful evening, a Chamber of Commerce advertisement for the Pacific Northwest, far too pleasant for my mood.

“You got the piss kicked out of you today, didn’t you?” That was my dad, no pulling punches. I nodded.

“You’re probably thinking there is no way you will ever pitch in the Majors, right?”

Again, the dejected nod. The truth is not kind to a teenager, not that kind of truth, not delivered with the gentleness of a bulldozer.

“You might not, buddy. Hell, you probably won’t, and I’ll kick it up a notch further and tell you there’s going to be a hell of a lot that you want that you won’t get in life. That’s just the real of it, Bill. But would you like to know what separates the real winners from the losers in this game of life?”

“The real winners in life get up every single day, knowing they are going to fail more often than they succeed, and yet they continue to try their hardest and they don’t give up. Now knock off the pouting, get up off your butt, and go mow the lawn, and I expect the best damned lawn-mowing you are capable of.”

You Get What You Need

Mick sang it, and it’s the truth. What I needed, from that experience, and what I needed a thousand other different times, was a philosophy about life which would help me through all of the setbacks and trials and failures, and Dad provided that philosophy. If you get your butt kicked by life, get back up and keep moving forward. You never give up and you always do your best.

Period! The Gospel according to Dale LeRoy Holland!

Interesting fact: the absolute best hitter in baseball fails to get a hit two-thirds of the time he stands at home plate with a bat in his hand.

A 67% failure rate determines the best in the Major Leagues.

I don’t know about you, but that fact makes me feel pretty damned good today.

Have a beautifully-flawed day, and thanks for sitting on the porch with me today.

Bill

2020 William D. Holland (aka billybuc)

“Helping human to spread their wings and fly.”

H.O.W. (Humanity One World)

Questions & Answers

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      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        10 days ago from Olympia, WA

        I'll take your word for that, Zulma, me being ignorant about Rounders as a sport. :) Happy Monday to you, my friend.

      • phoenix2327 profile image

        Zulma Burgos-Dudgeon 

        10 days ago from United Kingdom

        Hi, Bill.

        Actually, rounders is more similar to baseball than cricket is. It's more of a mini version and usually played by children rather than adults.

        Have a lovely Monday.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        11 days ago from Olympia, WA

        Keep them coming, KC!

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        11 days ago from Olympia, WA

        Check KC out, Manatita! She is a kindred soul.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        11 days ago from Olympia, WA

        It's all good, KC! Thank you and I hope your weekend is wonderful.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        11 days ago from Olympia, WA

        KC, you are an instant friend, if you slept with your glove. :)

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        11 days ago from Olympia, WA

        Baseball is quite like cricket, yes! I'm sure it was the inspiration for the game, long ago.

        Thank you my brother! I hope you are well.

      • profile image

        KC McGee 

        11 days ago from Where I belong

        Hi Mamatita44, good to get your comment. Sorry about the mix up. Actually, I did write my first article three days ago. Received some comments.

        Many blessing to you manatita44

      • manatita44 profile image

        manatita44 

        11 days ago from london

        Bill won't mind, KC

        We have all made an error or two, here. Again, Bill and I sometimes share similar energies. Chuckle.

        Welcome, Bro. Don't think you've written anything yet. Best wishes. You're with great friends here. Peace.

      • profile image

        KC McGee 

        11 days ago from Where I belong

        Bill, my below comment was ment to thank you. By my err I mentioned mamatita44.

        Blessing

      • profile image

        KC McGee 

        12 days ago from Where I belong

        As a kid, I played, ate and slept baseball with a glove in my hand. Your story brought back very fond memories.

        Thank manatita44

      • manatita44 profile image

        manatita44 

        12 days ago from london

        Great start with your new series! Kudos to you, Bro.

        You took me back to the tiny village of Hermitage, St, Patrick's, in Grenada, W.I, where I was born and brought up. I believe we named a particular ball or throw a 'groundass.' Isn't hockey a bit like cricket? Your 'grounder' is quite close. Haha.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        2 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        I believe I agree with you, Jo! Thanks so much, my friend.

      • jo miller profile image

        Jo Miller 

        2 weeks ago from Tennessee

        I believe Dale LeRoy Holland told the gospel truth and you were one lucky kid.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        2 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        You are very kind, Dora. Thank you so much. I know you do as much as I do to help others, so blessings to you always, my friend.

      • MsDora profile image

        Dora Weithers 

        2 weeks ago from The Caribbean

        Bill, you're blessed and what a blessing you have become to so many of us. My guess is that there's much more inspiration left in you, and your world is waiting. Best to you!

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        2 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        I appreciate that, William. I've never thought of myself as wise, but my dad sure was, in his own way.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        2 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        You are always welcome here, Denise. I'll save a seat for you and you can just show up whenever you have the time.

        Blessings always

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        2 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Thank you Heidi! I had thought of that regarding the Mailbag....we'll see how it goes. I can see value in your idea.

        Happy Sunday my friend.

      • lifegate profile image

        William Kovacic 

        2 weeks ago from Pleasant Gap, PA

        Well, now I know where you get your wisdom, Bill. And your sharing it is a gift to us. Thank you, sir.

      • PAINTDRIPS profile image

        Denise McGill 

        2 weeks ago from Fresno CA

        I know the feeling. My dad told me I'd never be a great artist. Not that I probably wouldn't be but that I'd never be. I'd probably starve to death and not make any money until I died. Yet knowing all that does not keep me from going to the artboard every morning and starting again on something I totally love to do. It can be discouraging but it is what it is. Thanks for letting me rock in your porch swing for while.

        Blessings,

        Denise

      • heidithorne profile image

        Heidi Thorne 

        2 weeks ago from Chicago Area

        Thoughtful and inspiring, as always!

        I wondered what direction you might take with a podcast. The one you're proposing here would be for your loyal family of fans and friends. This would be a labor of love.

        I also think you could just duplicate the Mailbag in a weekly podcast. That would be an easy repurposing of your work. That has some legs with a defined audience of writers looking for guidance and perspective.

        Whichever way you go, I can't wait to see--make that hear--what you do!

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        2 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        I did for sure, Rajan! Thank you sir! Enjoy your weekend.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        2 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Greg, it's a cruel world out there, and yet we both overcame and moved on. Bravo for us.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        2 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Thank you Nithya! I appreciate your kind words.

      • rajan jolly profile image

        Rajan Singh Jolly 

        2 weeks ago from From Mumbai, presently in Jalandhar, INDIA.

        No wonder you teach so well about life and things. You had a very good teacher in your dad, my friend. Have a great weekend and stay safe.

      • boxelderred profile image

        greg cain 

        2 weeks ago from Moscow, Idaho, USA

        Glad to hear about the tooth, Bill, and hope you can avoid the stitch pop. Yikes! I think it’s true, what is said in one of my fave Rolling Stones songs: We don’t always get our wants, but we do indeed get what we need. For me and my baseball desires: I applied to South Dakota and also to Arizona State for college with intent to walk on and take the college baseball scene by storm. Kick in shin number one came when I was accepted to ASU and realized I could never in a million years afford to go there. Kick number two came when walking voluntarily onto then involuntarily off of the USD Coyote baseball field. Even at the D2 college level the number of folks who are good enough to play is minuscule as compared to Little League and Legion days. I was lucky to get the rejection I needed early enough to move in a different, more appropriate direction.

      • Vellur profile image

        Nithya Venkat 

        2 weeks ago from Dubai

        We do not always get what we want, so true. Your dad's words of advice must have helped you to get going again. I enjoyed reading this, it is an excellent teaser for the podcast.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        2 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        I did for sure, Linda. They were strict, but they were also admirable.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        2 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Great point, Flourish. I've been paired off in work groups with people who spoke at a much higher level than I. That put me in my place very quickly. I've got "game," but I'll never be the best, and that's fine.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        2 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Thanks a bunch, Greg! The tooth came out smoothly. Now, if I can avoid popping stitches for two weeks, all will be well.

      • AliciaC profile image

        Linda Crampton 

        2 weeks ago from British Columbia, Canada

        This is an interesting look at your life, Bill. Good parents can be excellent teachers for us. It certainly sounds like you had good ones!

      • FlourishAnyway profile image

        FlourishAnyway 

        3 weeks ago from USA

        Lots of wisdom on porches, whether Jodah’s poetry porch or your own. We can’t all make it to the proverbial big leagues or the literal ones, but we can each be the best version of ourselves. If you’ve ever taken an intelligence test like I did with a group of intellectually gifted grad students it’s a humbling experience. At some point each person will hit a natural wall as a part of the test and is unable to continue to solve the problems. You look around and see who if anyone is still working. They have a higher IQ.

      • boxelderred profile image

        greg cain 

        3 weeks ago from Moscow, Idaho, USA

        Bill - I understand that concern more than you could know based on personal feelings of the same sort in certain settings. Still, in your case, there seems to be little chance of that coming to pass. First, just you making such a comment demonstrates a keen awareness of this particular pitfall. Second, your style is informative, coaching-like, not overbearing. This makes it effective and engaging, never off-putting. My tuppence, anyway. Good luck with the tooth extraction.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Thank you Greg! The danger, of course, is in becoming a rambling old man who bores everyone with his words of the past. lol I'll try to avoid being that old man.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Thanks so much, Susan! He didn't seem terribly wise to talk to, but if you listened to his words, the wisdom was there.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        We certainly do, Devika, and hopefully, what we learn, is of positive value.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        No rambling at all, Eric. Just good sharing. As for 1x8's with handles, I knew them all too well, holes drilled in them to cut back on the wind resistance. My butt still hurts.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Zulma, I'll have to run out and buy a corncob pipe. I had one once, in another lifetime. A straw hat too, me thinks. I've already got the bibs. :)

        I can't imagine a childhood with an absent father. Doesn't register with me at all, thankfully. But you ended up pretty damned good, so there you go.

        Be well, or as your PM says, stay alert!

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Mr. Happy, I'm laughing. The movie I was talking about was "The Swimmer" and it was made in 1968. Excuse my memory. As for Burt Lancaster, you've never heard of him? My goodness, I don't know how to respond to that. haha

        It's all good, my friend. I have to run now. Time to get a tooth pulled. It's a front tooth, so I'm going to look like a hillbilly soon.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        There's never too much reminiscing, Gilbert. I enjoyed yours. Thanks for the visit. Be well my friend.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Just think cricket, Nell. That's close enough, although I can't figure out why they have to bounce the ball before the batter can swing at it. lol

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Hey Mike, thanks for stopping by. I knew a baseball lover like you would like this article. As for hailstorm, it's good advice. This time of year, all bets are off regarding Mother Nature. So far we've dodged the bullet and our garden looks vibrant.

      • boxelderred profile image

        greg cain 

        3 weeks ago from Moscow, Idaho, USA

        Bill - you clearly take after the old man, have developed your own sage wisdom over the years. Most importantly, though, you've also learned how to share the wisdom effectively. I think this is a wonderful idea for an ongoing podcast series, but it also works well in this format. My take is that either (or both in conjunction?) will be quite successful. It certainly is informative, wise, and engaging. I think I could see a small group of folks sitting around wide-eyed and cross-legged listening while you rock slowly and speak truths learned through years of experience.

      • Just Ask Susan profile image

        Susan Zutautas 

        3 weeks ago from Ontario, Canada

        What a wonderfully wise man your Dad was. I really enjoyed this Bill. Have a great Thursday!

      • DDE profile image

        Devika Primić 

        3 weeks ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

        This is amazing of you life as you say it. I believe that we all learn from our parents.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Thank you Beth! They were pretty special for sure.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Hopefully, Bill, I can piece together the time to do that soon. Thank you sir!

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Very true, Mary! You rarely see that sort of neighborly communing now. Sad part of life which is no longer.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Thank you Ruby! Tough times will be included. I had my share, but I found the light before it was too late.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Thank you Ajodo! I'm so happy you enjoyed the trip back in time. Blessings to you always.

      • Ericdierker profile image

        Eric Dierker 

        3 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

        Bill I still can't deal with 2X4 boards. My lessons had to be learnt by one of them across my face. Of course the same goes for a 1X4 18 inch board with a handle. You probably do not know what I mean being a basically good kid and the man you are today.

        I was a prearranged type of adoption. From birth I was chosen in love. A bastard illegitimate boy born with more love than a four armed man could shake sticks at.

        Being youngest of six I learned the most about love when mom and dad would take me aside for catch or cooking or such.

        Sorry I rambled.

      • phoenix2327 profile image

        Zulma Burgos-Dudgeon 

        3 weeks ago from United Kingdom

        And there it is. My mental image of you, sitting on a porch, clad in bib overalls, waxing lyrical about life lessons, with a corncob pipe clenched in your mouth, has come to fruition. :D

        Bill, your childhood and mine couldn't be more diametrically opposed. While your father offered sage advice, mine was mostly absent. I spent so many years pitying myself, but in the last few years, I've come to realise that difficult as my childhood was, it could have been so much worse. At least I had a roof over my head, three squares and an education. I'm in a better place now and am part of a loving if fractious family. I guess you could say I got what I needed to get what I wanted.

        No surprise John was in the audience. He was a fan of the Stones and Mick was who he wanted to be when he grew up. lol

        I know I'm going to enjoy this series and look forward to your first podcast.

        Take care.

      • Mr. Happy profile image

        Mr. Happy 

        3 weeks ago from Toronto, Canada

        "You Get What You Need" - A lot in Life ... well, no. Everything in Life is about Perception. I would say that some people can be crusty about their lives, complain about it and say that everything worked against them. I met a few of this type of creature.

        On the other hand, I try to make lemonade out of my lemons. Just add water and honey. So, it's kinda how one looks at it and being creative helps too I would say.

        And yes, reality can be painful at times. It will be painful but like You said: "get back up and keep moving forward". There's always a way to keep going ... this comes to mind again:

        “Empty your mind, be formless, shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water my friend.” - Bruce Lee

        Anyway, we're getting in spiritual realms now so back to this three dimensional perspective: what "Running Man" were You speaking of? I'm a 80s kid. Arnold Schwarzeneger made a "Running Man" in '87. For some reason I do not think You were talking about that one because the actor You named is a guy from a different time-line it seems, haha!! Never heard of him. What year was the movie made?

        Okay, my time for bed is coming-up. The day was pretty perfect to be honest. I mean, I didn't find thyme, hot peppers and basil but I got everything else, including some very pretty flowers for the front lawn. I sat-up in my balcony starring at the driveway this evening for quite a while. It's pretty. I wish them all well, it's getting below freezing tonight ... this weather. I was up north yesterday, like about two and a half hours driving north of the city and it was snowing, like real snow. Haha!!

        Nuts. I'm off to bed. You have yourself a good one. Cheers!

      • rebelogilbert profile image

        Gilbert Arevalo 

        3 weeks ago from Hacienda Heights, California

        I loved your personal story Bill. I loved baseball as a kid, too. I didn't have aspirations to play ball as a pro. In grammar school I loved whiffle ball baseball, and I enjoyed playing hardball and softball during my Cal State Fullerton days. That's enough reminiscing! Your point of us not giving up as writers is well taken.

      • Nell Rose profile image

        Nell Rose 

        3 weeks ago from England

        How lovely to have parents who sat you down and taught you about the world. Mine were sweet, kind and lovely. But I don't remember them ever teaching or telling me anything. I never thought of that before. As for baseball, its an alien concept over here in England, lol! but saying that, one of my favorite films is Field of Dreams. Funny that. Take care x

      • Mr Archer profile image

        Mr Archer 

        3 weeks ago from Missouri

        Bill, I can relate, more than you know. With Life, rare is the day we get what we want but often is the day we get what we need, for that moment in time anyway. And we have to be happy with that, for if we are not we will never be happy at all.

        I played baseball until I was 12 then switched to fast pitch softball, desiring to pitch and play in the Pan Am Games (remember them?). As a kid I would play catch with anyone who would stand still long enough to catch what I threw, and if there wasn't anyone I would throw against a wall, a fence or even a pair of tightly rolled socks into my pillow standing up on my bed in the corner.

        But, my dreams weren't to be. Ah well. I love this article and look forward to a podcast. I have never watched one of those so yours will be my first. Stay safe my friend. And watch your garden! Spring storms and all; mine got hit with a hailstorm that wasn't forecast a couple of weeks ago and one plant is still recovering.

      • bethperry profile image

        Beth Perry 

        3 weeks ago from Tennesee

        Your dad was a smart man, and it sounds like you had a great pair of adoption parents.

      • bdegiulio profile image

        Bill De Giulio 

        3 weeks ago from Massachusetts

        Sounds like your dad was a very wise man. I think this new series will be a big hit and as a podcast it would be great to sit and listen to you speak from the heart on life lessons.

      • aesta1 profile image

        Mary Norton 

        3 weeks ago from Ontario, Canada

        I like the statement at the end....not just writers but all of us to spread our wings. How beautiful it would be if we all take care of each other as we are one organism. This idea of the porch is something I can relate to as we often did the same and neighbours come and join and it is how we updated each other. Sad that this no longer happens. No more of these spontaneous sharing.

      • always exploring profile image

        Ruby Jean Richert 

        3 weeks ago from Southern Illinois

        Man, this was totally unexpected and such a joy to read! Your dad was a special man who taught you well. I know you miss him everyday. I'm hooked. I want more. I know you had some rough times, hoping you will write about it.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Liz, I love that. I would have liked your mother. I certainly would have understood her. She sounds like my mother.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Same generation, Pamela! We all have memories like this one, taught by tough but loving parents.

        Thanks for being here, my friend.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        I did see that, Sha, and for sure it is very cool.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        I appreciate that, John! Let's hope your words are prophetic.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Ann, I think I want that playing at my wake. It's always been my favorite from the Lads.

        Hard lessons taught by hard but loving people. I wouldn't have it any other way, my friend.

        Stay alert! I still can't believe your PM said that. lol

        bill

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        You are the Running Man today, Mr. Happy. Did you ever see that movie? Burt Lancaster I think....weird I think. :) Blessings my friend.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        For sure they were from the same mold, Peggy. The Great Depression did that to people: made them hard and pragmatic. Thank God I learned from them.

        Thanks so much!

      • Eurofile profile image

        Liz Westwood 

        3 weeks ago from UK

        Thanks for sharing this. I think it's a great platform to go back to the porch of your childhood and reminisce about life lessons you were taught. Your title reminded me of my mother's often repeated mantra in my childhood of 'I want, never gets'. I suspect it was in response to my wants getting on her nerves.

      • Pamela99 profile image

        Pamela Oglesby 

        3 weeks ago from Sunny Florida

        Your dad was really great. Parents can teach children so mch when they take the time to notice a child's disappointing failures. I can't even count how often I have had to get back up.

        This was a nice talk on the proch and I relate to eveything except I was not adopted but still my father did not always notice when I needed some good advice.

      • bravewarrior profile image

        Shauna L Bowling 

        3 weeks ago from Central Florida

        I came back to watch videos. Did you notice that John Lennon was in the audience of The Stones' performance? Very cool!

      • Jodah profile image

        John Hansen 

        3 weeks ago from Queensland Australia

        This was great Bill. I can tell your new series will already be a hit. Your memories and lessons learned make enjoyable reading.

      • annart profile image

        Ann Carr 

        3 weeks ago from SW England

        This is great, bill. I think any stories about family, well-told of course, are so interesting to anyone because we've all got them, or a version of one. I like your Dad's directness! Hard lessons have to be learnt and then, if we're smart, we become better people. Wouldn't it be boring if everything was easy?!

        I was lucky with my parents too and we need to celebrate that kind of thing. Thanks for letting us in to learn about your past.

        I love 'In my Life'; it's one of my favourite Beatles tracks.

        Ann

      • Mr. Happy profile image

        Mr. Happy 

        3 weeks ago from Toronto, Canada

        "Have a beautifully-flawed day" - No, no, no. I'm gonna have a perfect day! You just watch. I'll be back later to tell You all about it lmao

        Honestly, I do have to run all of a sudden but thanks for the insight. I for one appreciate it greatly. Cheers!

      • Peggy W profile image

        Peggy Woods 

        3 weeks ago from Houston, Texas

        Your dad was a smart man and taught you well. Most everyone who succeeds in this life has also faced failure at some point—people who become successful move on and do not let the setbacks stop their progress.

        I look forward to learning more wisdom passed on to you from your parents. They sound a lot like my parents, who also grew up in the same era.

      • Endy Noble profile image

        Ajodo Endurance Uneojo 

        3 weeks ago from Lokoja, Nigeria.

        Hello Bill. This isn't 2020. It's 2050. Hope you figure that out. Anyway, don't border. Everything in life do not make sense. Or at least, most do thirty years later.

        Bill, I love this story and every of your story that I have read. You know what? I am not a committed fan. I wish I can be here to read every one of your writing. Life is going to say, "NO" to that, right?

        Great dad!

        Great son!

        The two always go together, Bill.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Thank you Rosina! It was nice spending time with you on the porch.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Allen, I'm just trying to keep his legacy alive. I think there is value in the lessons I've learned. I hope others can relate to them. I thank you for your wonderful comment. Take care and stay safe out there.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        James, I didn't always learn fast enough, but eventually the lesson was learned. :) Thank you sir!

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Thank you Sha! A southpaw I am indeed. The nuns tried to switch me over to a righty when I was young, but my dad wouldn't allow it. He was a handful for sure. lol

      • surovi99 profile image

        Rosina S Khan 

        3 weeks ago

        Glad to sit on the porch with you and learn some pretty good life lessons. I think this is a good idea and will soar.

      • Aliswell profile image

        Allen Edwards 

        3 weeks ago from Iowa

        Bill, your words of baseball and your aspirations surrounding a fantasy in which you would become the main character in the "the Mick" moping back to the dugout after you just finished throwing that "high hard one", strike 3, past him..well I can 1000% relate my friend☆

        The part about your Dad giving you the support, and, sometimes needed reality check...No such luck on my part•

        I know you feel extreme gratitude for your Dad and his mentoring, as well you should. You have thanked him in perpetuity with these words and given your readers pause to reflect on our own memories, close to yours!

      • justthemessenger profile image

        James C Moore 

        3 weeks ago from The Great Midwest

        Right on cue. When I saw your hub's title the stone's lyrics played through my mind. You have truly lived and learned.

      • bravewarrior profile image

        Shauna L Bowling 

        3 weeks ago from Central Florida

        Bill, I think this series is a great idea. We get to walk with you, Maggie, and Toby once a week and now you've invited us to reminisce and reflect as we set a spell on your front porch.

        Love it!

        I learned something about you today that I didn't know: you're a southpaw!

        I'll be back to listen to the videos. They're a part of my past, too.

      • billybuc profile imageAUTHOR

        Bill Holland 

        3 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

        Thank you Linda! He could be a bit "blunt," like a 2x4 between the eyes, but his approach to life has gotten me through some tough times.

      • Carb Diva profile image

        Linda Lum 

        3 weeks ago from Washington State, USA

        My gosh, I love your Dad.

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