Pro's and Con's of Exploding Soda Pop Cans
You Attend This Party
and it is a special party. It is a party to celebrate your 20-year milestone in your company. Everyone is laughing, talking, munching, some are drinking and there you are, the guest of honor. The company CEO has invited you to sit with him at the front of the room so he can present you with a silver plaque to commemorate your hard work with the company. You are so happy. Then, the waiters begin to serve more refreshments—and the drink of choice is a nationally-known soda pop that is sold in the can. (This should be your first red flag going up fast). Then at the right time, you take the soda, and without thinking, you pop the top and it is equivalent to a stick of dynamite exploding and the soda splashes in your face, hair, and clothing. The entire group of people including the CEO, falls over laughing. Not you. This “accident” was strategically-planned just for your honor. Even your conservative wife who seldom laughs, laughs like a hyena and sheds tears down her cheeks.
The Secret Told
is nothing new. Ever since the invention of carbonated drinks, this easy prank (shaking the can or bottle prior to the opening) proves to work every time. And as you see from above’s hypothetical account of a guy who is really the unsuspecting sort, falls for the exploding soda to the delight of the crowd. Any crowd. This prank has even been used in a traveling automobile. The exploding soda never grows old.
While I talked about soda cans being shaken and ready for the explosion, the same can be said for beer cans and bottles, champagne, and some household cleaning products, but I can advise you to NEVER resort to shaking any of these products for fear that the can or bottle could go off in your hand and you might suffer injury. Just stick to beer and soda cans and bottle and of course, the champagne.
What Really Causes Such
sudden-embarrassment when a person falls for an exploding soda can? This is a tough question. I can guess that the person who does not have the least idea that he or she is about to be “spewed,” does not know about it—and the explosion is a total surprise. And the spewing sound makes the prank even better. Whomever came up with the exploding soda can (and other carbonated products) should receive some sort of medal given by President Donald J. Trump for this prank giving the nation a lot of good laughs. You might think about how this could be done, but without the prankster having little no sense in shaking Trump’s can or bottle and then letting him get the worst of the event. Please don’t.
You see. This exploding soda can can be understood as a nationwide prank that can be engineered by anyone. But the best, or worst, depending on the event, is when a group of pretty girls, members of the same popular sorority, cannot stand “that” one girl because the rest of the gals are highly-jealous, so they conspire to give her a nice party with standard equipment of being a pre-shaken can of soda that is just for the one girl who has made the other sorority sisters very miserable.
Cutting to the chase, the pretty girl sits at the Table of Honor. She, along with the other girls, eat finger food (but not real fingers) and when it is time for the girl to give her “that” special can of soda, the sorority leader hands the soda to the girl and within five seconds, the entire room is engrossed with total chaos and pandemonium—and the sounds of wild laughter can be heard for six city blocks. Then girl, who doesn’t retaliate, simply stands up and delivers one of the most-caring piece of information that anyone could deliver. When she finishes, the entire room is in tears, including the sorority leader. Everyone embraces, including the girl covered wit soda, and all is good again. The exploding soda can doesn’t always work. Remember that.
And There are Times
when the exploding soda can/bottle is NOT recommended in any way. Here is a short list of those locales where an exploding soda can/bottle will result in you being arrested, chewed-out and possibly arrested.
- If you are on a police stake-out—that loud exploding will give you away and the thug will get away.
- In the audience where President Trump is delivering a very serious speech. Need I tell you about how rough the Secret Service can be?
- If your army sergeant puts you on Sniper Duty that requires total-silence on your behalf. One exploding soda can will lead to your Dishonorable Discharge.
- On the first date when you take out a girl who looks like Jessica Alba.
- When you are doing intricate surgery on a patient’s heart problem.
And these are only a few places where an exploding soda can/bottle is strictly verboten.
All I can say is, soda can anyone?
May 18, 2019___________________________________________________
Questions & Answers
© 2019 Kenneth Avery