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Conversation with Death in My Mother’s Final Hours

MsDora, Certified Christian Counselor, helps grieving persons by sharing practical suggestions and by her personal expressions of grief.

Eating less and less, my mother began to look like a live skeleton. It was difficult to watch her and still more difficult to bathe and dress her.

Her heart kept beating at a normal rate, but her bony rib cage heaving in and out made breathing seem like a chore which overtaxed her body. On the day she stopped responding, everything in me—my strength, my courage, my emotions collapsed.

My first cry was to God. “God, I do not want this. My mother doesn’t want this. Do something to change this situation.”

“That’s why I’m here,” Death whispered.

But even in death the righteous seek refuge in God.

But even in death the righteous seek refuge in God.

“I wasn’t talking to you,” I said that with all the rudeness I could muster, but no insults could push him away.

“I understand,” he seemed to say, “but I am one of God’s answers when human beings ask for loved ones to be spared the travesty of a lifeless life.”

For the next two hours, the three of us—Death, my mother and I shared the room. God was there too, inhabiting each of us, and assisting me in making peace with the intruder.

1. Death Provides Refuge

My mental capacity was inadequate for debate and rebuttal. Death reasoned with me about some positive issues which lessened my desire to struggle.

My mother had experienced 85 years of productive life. I had watched her mature from a shy, uncertain teenage mother to a mature, influential woman of faith. She had worked hard, leaving me sufficient to build on. Now that her brain power had deserted her and her physical stride had become too stressful for her body, rest seemed like a fitting reward.

“But don’t expect me to thank you,” I pouted.

“You’re welcome,” Death smiled.

2. Death Takes and Gives

My mother's grave is near to the poinciana - our national flower.  That's precious. It helps us remember her love of flowers and her beautiful garden.

My mother's grave is near to the poinciana - our national flower. That's precious. It helps us remember her love of flowers and her beautiful garden.

The emotional ties between my mother and me had been strengthened. Sitting on the bed close beside her to prop her up would be a lasting memory of how intertwined our lives had been when as her child I relied on her care; and when as my aged mother, she relied on mine. There was love even though we did not say the words.

“It isn’t fair to rob people of life and love!” I screamed at Death.

“The one you lose does not feel robbed,” he replied gently, “and when she leaves, you'll reflect on reasons to appreciate and thank me. You'll even find time to do that."

3. Death Is Limited

"Death, you may claim the body, but that's all you can touch."

When my mother could no longer remember words, she hummed the tunes of songs she loved. What she hummed the most was that 1831 arrangement by Thomas Hastings for the song Come Ye Disconsolate written in 1816 by Thomas Moore. It contains the following lines, each one at the end of a stanza.

Earth has no sorrow that heav’n cannot heal.
Earth has no sorrow that heav’n cannot cure.
Earth has no sorrow but heav’n can remove.

Alzheimer’s could not take away her habits of prayer and singing, and death cannot take away the love between her and her God, or her legacy of faith.

“Death, you lose.”

4. Death Aids Self-Awareness

It was difficult to watch Death reach for my mother without remembering that one day he would reach for me.

“Sooner or later?” I asked him, though not wanting an answer.

“What else do I want to finish between now and then?” I asked myself.

He intruded again. “Just a reminder that when I show up, it’s over. What is undone remains undone. My presence here today may be primarily to end your mother’s struggles, but if you pay attention, it can also remind you to focus on yours.

"You will leave owing the world a debt if you shirk the responsibilities to which you have been assigned."

My short bucket list popped up before me, and I felt Death looking over my shoulder with an undefined curiosity. I prayed that from that day onward, I would be careful to use my time wisely.

5. Death Promotes Fellowship

Death accommodates fellowship.

Death accommodates fellowship.

“One of your redeeming factors, Death, is your influence in gathering family and friends who establish or renew connectedness.”

“True, and although folks do not give me credit, they appreciate the happy fellowship which lighten the sad moments.”

That would be especially true in my mother’s situation. Eight children of her late sister had preciously scheduled a reunion with daily activities for the week in which my mother would be buried. The reunion with extended family lifted our burden.

“Death you lose again; not only because of the earthly reunion, but also because we hope for a heavenly which will include my mother.”


Scripture quotations throughout this article are from the New International Version.

Insightful Quotes about Death

  • None of us, in our culture of comfort, know how to prepare ourselves for dying, but that's what we should do every day. - Joni Eareckson Tada
  • I don’t so much pray that my death will be without pain, but that it will be without doubt. – John Piper
  • If we have been pleased with life, we should not be displeased with death, since it comes from the hand of the same master. - Michelango
  • The highest tribute to the dead is not grief but gratitude. - Thornton Wilder
  • Love like there’s no tomorrow, and if tomorrow comes, love again. - Max Lucado

© 2016 Dora Weithers

Comments

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on February 08, 2017:

Thank you, Ann. I shall try to find your book review. Humans have so many experiences in common and they help us understand and empathize with each other.

Ann Carr from SW England on February 08, 2017:

This is stupendous, Dora, and remarkable. I love the conversations with Death. It reminds a great deal of my mother's death-bed, when I sat with her, listening to that awful rattle, trying to make sense of it, trying to think of things to say to ease her burden. My head pounded and I was lost but your thoughts here are remarkably similar to my own.

Your conversation is such an imaginative one, such a 'proper' one, such an illuminating one. For that I thank you. It has eased my heart too.

This also reminds me of 'The Book Thief', where Death is the narrator (I did a hub review about it). There is humour there but there is discussion too, very much like this.

Well done, Dora! One of your best for sure.

With love,

Ann

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on February 03, 2017:

Dream, thanks for returning and sharing. Your visit not only helps keep your memories alive, but mine also. Deep inside the hole human race, we relate to each other in loss and in comfort. Thank you.

DREAM ON on February 03, 2017:

I want you to know I go back and read this hub often.I think what would my mother and I be doing right now. I think sitting and having breakfast and reading your hub together. My mother could talk for hours about her love for her family. I would listen intently trying to memorize every word

She would give me a look.I know when I am gone you will forget what we talked about.Maybe so but I tried to remember all your love and the fun that we shared.I miss you mom. Thank you for all your love. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.Have a fantastic day.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on February 03, 2017:

Char, thanks you for sharing your experience. Please accept my sympathy also on the loss of your father. Whatever Death is or does, we must take comfort in that it cannot rob us of the love we shared with our loved ones.

Char Milbrett from Minnesota on February 03, 2017:

Tears! I loved this! I held my father's hand until he passed. In the last moments,I decided to tell him that I loved him, that I was glad to have had the chance to be with him every day, for the few months he had left, that I'd miss him, but he'd be okay where he was going, and not to worry about me, I'd be fine, and we'd meet up later... I didn't know if he'd hear me, but when I was done speaking, two tears ran out of his right eye and ended up in a small pool in his right ear. -- He did hear me, and I treasure the memory.

Death, to me, is like what a fetus must go through minutes before being born. That passage through a tunnel with a light at the end. Sorry for your loss, and thank you for this well written piece.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on December 13, 2016:

Yvonne, thanks for your kind comment. It makes me happy that you find some comfort in the article. Ever so often, the thought of death crosses our minds and your focus should be everybody's - "to leave a beautiful goodbye for . . . loved ones."

Yvonne Teo from Singapore on December 13, 2016:

#hugs Ms Dora. The quotes from (4) Death aids self awareness totally gripped me. As I have only lost my mother-in-law to cancer recently, articles like these strangely comforts me and makes me want to leave a beautiful goodbye for my loved ones as far as I can... when the eventual comes. As a mom, I can only add that your mom's love will always be with you and she is very blessed to have you care for her in that final journey.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on November 15, 2016:

Thanks, Mo. These quotes are among my favorite and they help keep me stay focused.

Mo on November 14, 2016:

Sorry for such a major loss. May God help you keep this positive perspective always. The quotes on death are worth remembering.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on November 05, 2016:

Ruby, thanks for your sympathy concerning my loss. Yes, I miss my mother and look forward to the resurrection when we will meet our mothers again. Till then, let's be faithful and hopeful. I appreciate you!

Ruby Jean Richert from Southern Illinois on November 05, 2016:

I know it has been months since your mother went to heaven. I know you are still feeling the pain and loss. My mother passed away in 1968, but she still lives in my heart. I know we both will be with them again when our time is up to leave our earthly home. This was so beautiful! When death lingers we want to scream, " No go away " My mother, like your's was in so much pain. I now know it was a blessing..

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on October 26, 2016:

Barry, thank you for your encouragement and your condolences. I appreciate you.

Barry on October 26, 2016:

Death really shouldn't frighten us. I like that you portray him as a loser. Late, but please accept my condolences.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on September 20, 2016:

Thanks, Arline, and you should expect me to smile at you being speechless. Love, always!

Arline frederick on September 19, 2016:

Speechless...................

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on September 12, 2016:

Dan, thank you for sharing your experience concerning the death of your Dad. It is touching that he made the decision to die at home; death of a loved one is a family affair. After 15 years, your compassion for him still shines through and please know that I find your sharing very comforting. May we continue to find peace in the memories our loved ones left with us.

Dan Harmon from Boise, Idaho on September 12, 2016:

A moving hub, MsDora, and one that brings back memories. I, my 4 siblings and my mother brought my father home from the hospital some 15 years ago, a last ride for our truck driver as he had been given only a week or so to live and made the choice to die at home, among his family.

It was not to be: death came knocking that very night, only hours after we got Dad home and I...I spent the rest of the night walking the dark streets of my childhood neighborhood and talking to Death. I got the same message you did, with an emphasis on the fact that Death can, and often does, provide refuge. Dad gave up but days of life for a last night in his own home, with his children and wife around him and at peace with the world. He used his time wisely and left behind his deteriorating and pain filled body.

For the rest of us there was grief, yes, but we all recognized that refuge and have never been sorry that we were able to help Dad meet Death on his own terms. I also think we all talked with Death that night, in our own way.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on September 11, 2016:

Martie, thanks for your comforting comment. I appreciate your kind sentiments.

Martie Coetser from South Africa on September 10, 2016:

Dear MsDora, this is an extremely insightful conversation you have had with Death. Why, we always learn so much about life and death while we experience tremendous emotional pain. Thank you for sharing your insight. May you be blessed with strength and peace while missing your dearest mother for the rest of your life. As you've said, Death only took her body away. The rest of her is in your heart and mind until you meet again.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on September 09, 2016:

Dream, thank you for sharing about your mom--the love and comfort you experience when thinking of her. It's been almost four years, but please accept my sympathy. Our mothers have left indelible footprints on our lives, and we are blessed to have such sweet memories. Best to you!

DREAM ON on September 09, 2016:

As I read your moving hub about your mothers passing my throat closed and eyes became unable to read. I stopped many times thinking how wonderful you captured the most beautiful words to share your hardest and saddest moments. All I want to do is take the pain away. I don't know how. What I do know is through it all I feel enormous love and that love continues to grow in every direction possible. Love does not end with the physical passing of a loved one. It only grows deeper in a way it never could in the physical world. Think and talk of your mom often and with that your moms memories her beautiful life will flourish. When you feel blue look back at this hub not in sadness but in kindness and beauty of all the hubbers who you and your mom connected with. My own mom will have passed four years this Novevember. I am still dealing with many emotions. I feel relief and peacefulness in your words. You have helped me heal in my own grief. I often think what would my mom do. Then I think of her smiling face and even if I don't have the answer. I feel comfort and love. Thank you for finding the strength and power to write this touching hub. Wishing you many more happy days ahead. Where you can embrace all your mothers love.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on September 05, 2016:

Chris, thanks for your comment. I'm sorry for your loss, and happy that you are able to take it in stride. I know what you mean about not being ready. Even though I saw death in the room, it was still difficult to accept the end. Please dwell on the happier memories, going forward!

Chris Mills from Traverse City, MI on September 05, 2016:

Thanks for this hub, MsDora. But any way we paint or write it, death is tough on everyone. I knew for 8 years that death would come for my wife, but was I ready that night? No way. You have shown some of the positives, if they can be called that. In time, we can see the good too. But it takes time. At least it did for me.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on August 15, 2016:

Thanks, Deb. I appreciate the caring sentiment. God bless you!

Deb Hirt from Stillwater, OK on August 14, 2016:

In this small world of ours we all are connected. With your loss, comes my loss.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on August 11, 2016:

Shauna, Amen to your expressions and thanks for your encouragement.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on August 11, 2016:

Shyron, I appreciate your thoughtful comment. Thanks for the reminder that God's plan always prove His concern for our benefit.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on August 11, 2016:

Thanks, Shanmarie for your kind words and encouragement. True, Alzheimer's is brutally destructive but it has limits.

Shauna L Bowling from Central Florida on August 11, 2016:

Dora, I'm so sorry you lost your mother. At the same time I'm happy she's no longer bound by the mind and body that betrayed her inner self. She's free now.

Thank you for sharing this letter with us. Even in grief, you impart wisdom.

Shyron E Shenko from Texas on August 10, 2016:

MsDora, I am so sorry for you loss.

A sad loss for those left behind.

Sadder still because the one you lost was so kind

But think how much kinder he Heaven will be

With you mother there

To wait to welcome you

And all of us her kindness we will share

*

Blessings MsDora.

Shannon Henry from Texas on August 10, 2016:

MsDora,

First, I want to offer my sincere condolences. I've been learning quite a bit about Alzheimer's and some of it has been from you and your hubs. I think I can understand the mixed feelings caregivers have. Dementia is such an awful thing. I remember when my grandma just stopped eating and being glad I wasn't there to witness the frailty, but also sad at the same time.

Second, I love the way you present things. You are such talented lady. And I am glad that you include the part about Alzheimer's not being able to steal her faith and prayers. How awful it would be to build such a strong faith only for a horrendous disease to be able to take even God away.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on August 10, 2016:

Audrey, thanks for reading and offering such a kind comment.

Audrey Howitt from California on August 09, 2016:

Thank you so much for sharing this deep and very personal story with us--Your heart is profoundly at peace, even in your grief

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on August 01, 2016:

Devika, thanks for your feedback. I appreciate your kind words.

Devika Primić from Dubrovnik, Croatia on August 01, 2016:

MsDora you are a strong and courageous woman to have shared your experience here. Acceptance is great and you have showed me that. I felt your grief and makes me wonder about such experiences.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on August 01, 2016:

Pacesetter, your gracious comment is like a bridge over troubles waters. Thanks you from the depths of my heart.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on August 01, 2016:

Besarien, I feel comforted by your comment, and I appreciate your prayers. God's blessings on you, too.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on August 01, 2016:

Thanks, Alicia. I think writing helps. appreciate your kindness.

Lawal Abiodun from Houston, Texas. on July 31, 2016:

Some unfortunate things might never be avoided, but our reaction towards it, is what defines its impact on us. You've indeed extracted good out of evil, light out of darkness, and life out of death. You've gleamed & beamed in a dim and damned world.

The devil tried to remind you of the present state, but you have seen it wise to remind him of the future we have in Christ Jesus (eternal life).

I Love you Ms. Dora (with the love of Christ), because you've always been an epitome of light, even in this caliginous world.

Thank you Ms. Dora.

Besarien from South Florida on July 30, 2016:

Dear Ms. Dora, I want to wrap you up in a big warm hug today. I am so very sorry to hear that your mother has passed. Everyone at HP who has had the joy of getting to know you probably already suspected that she was a remarkable mother and a very good person who will be missed from this world.

As one who sat where you sat with my own mother I so empathize. In fact, your hub moved me to tears even as it astounded me with your insight. Having both a deep faith and true understanding of death and the grieving process can only help you now. I hope your journey through your grief can be as much a celebration of your mother's long life and your rich relationship together as it is an adjustment to her loss in your life.

If my words fall short (and they always do,) I'll trust God to convey to you every possible solace. Know that you and your mom are in my thoughts and prayers.

Linda Crampton from British Columbia, Canada on July 29, 2016:

I am so very sorry for your loss, MsDora. My thoughts are with you. You have shared a beautiful and inspirational hub.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 29, 2016:

Thanks, Rajan. You give great advice concerning what our attitude toward death should be. Being in the queue should not be difficult to remember.

Rajan Singh Jolly from From Mumbai, presently in Jalandhar, INDIA. on July 29, 2016:

Death always is a reminder to us that each one of us is in a queue and not only must we not forget this but live life as the Scriptures define it for us for everlasting peace.

Sorry to learn about your loss. A mother's loss is the most felt.

The Scripture references are so profoundly true and numb the loss to a great extent.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 28, 2016:

JG, you're so kind. I appreciate you.

jgshorebird on July 28, 2016:

As always, your hubs are about what really "matters." Thank you for writing it and the way you wrote it.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 28, 2016:

Thanks, Faith. I appreciate your understanding, your compassion and your prayers. May God bless you, also.

Faith Reaper from southern USA on July 27, 2016:

Oh, Dear MsDora,

I'm so sorry for your great loss of such a precious Mother. This is such a beautiful tribute to her and your conversation with Death is eye-opening. I understand how much you are missing your dear Mother, for my Mother went on to be with the Lord God in December of 2012, and I am mindful just how blessed I was in this life to have such a loving and strong Mother, just as you are to have the Mother you have had in this life.

Thank you for sharing how your Mother still had her strong faith and loved to hum the hymns. That is comforting to you, I know.

I know our Mothers will forever live on in our hearts and those of many others too.

I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers during this time of loss.

God bless you

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 27, 2016:

Dirt Farmer, thanks for sharing your experience in losing your father. I smiled at the phrase "secret life of influence." I couldn't have said it better. It also reminds us to pay attention to our own influence--perhaps secret now, but surfacing later. I appreciate your comment.

Jill Spencer from United States on July 27, 2016:

I am sorry for your loss, MsDora. It really is a blessing and a wonder at how death brings those who are left behind together. Going home for my father's funeral, I was amazed to see a line of mourners who had come to pay their last respects streaming out of the funeral home, around the corner and down the street. It was as if he'd had a secret life of influence I had known nothing about. It sounds as if even in death, your mother's life is still exercising a powerful love over those left behind.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Jackie, I like all your expressions here, but your very last sentence makes me close my eyes and imagine an embrace with my mother. Thank you.

Jackie Lynnley from the beautiful south on July 26, 2016:

Dear friend, my mother has been gone six years now and there is still hardly a day I don't think of her and wish she were here but I know you have all the biblical truths to get you through and that make you strong. Still we will always be our mommies little girls and that is something we never want to give up no matter how it makes our heart feel. You like me I know will wish many things you wished you had done or still could do and even with all you gave her it will never feel like it was enough...but I guess that is just love our Father instilled in us.

God bless you and may you be rested and happy your mom is where she wanted to eventually be. May you hear her humming in the breezes and know she will always love you and appreciate all you did for her.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Thanks Laura. Really glad if it helps. God know how devastating the experience can be.

Laura Smith from Pittsburgh, PA on July 26, 2016:

This is a great perspective on a very universal topic. I know what it's like to be in a room when someone is taking their last breaths, and the concept alone is hard to wrap your head around, but it helps knowing that it's something that we all go through and experience in our lives. I think this is going to help a lot of people come to terms with that experience.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Peg Cole, I unintentionally missed responding to your comment. Thanks for the compliment and for the emphasis on personal faith during our time of bereavement. Very encouraging!

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Cynthia, I appreciate your expressions of comfort and encouragement. Happy if my story helps others to accept and endure the pain of watching our loved ones leave.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Pastor Bill, thanks for the reminder. Really, nothing matters more than being there to answer when the roll is called up yonder. Yes, I fell blessed to have been at my mother's side through her final ordeal. Blessings on you as well.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Teaches, thanks for your words of comfort. True that on many levels, "It is not an ending but a beginning."

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Frank, you're always so genuine. Thanks for being so kind and thoughtful.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Natasha, thanks for sharing your mother's experience. It is really a joy to know that a loved one dies ready. May we all.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Robert, thanks for your encouragement. Death is difficult to deal with, because we just hate him. I doubt whether that will change, but we must help each other accept his purpose.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Kiss and Tales, thanks for the kind words and also for your insight on death, the new earth and in between. I appreciate you.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Thanks, Cedric. Sharing this way also helps me sort out my feelings and helps me focus on what are the really important things about this situation.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Thanks, Mary. I have proven that nothing helps grief like gratitude. Thanksgiving lessens the sense of loss.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Dolores, I appreciate your kind thoughts. Yes, I will cherish the memories.

Cynthia Zirkwitz from Vancouver Island, Canada on July 26, 2016:

Dear Ms. Dora, I am sorry for your loss. Your ability to convey this conversation with Death in such a lucid way, touching all of us, in the pain of the recent event itself, is a tribute to your giftedness (i.e, writing/communication, compassion, faith,wisdom) and more important, a tribute to the Giver of the Gifts. May you be comforted and know Peace every day during this time of mourning. I'm sharing your hub because I know there are many out there who will be blessed by reading it. Thank you. ~Cynthia

William Kovacic from Pleasant Gap, PA on July 26, 2016:

Oh, Dora. Your mother fought such a good fight, and you were right there with her the whole time. what a blessing! Fellowship? Reunions? There's an even bigger one coming - When the role is called up yonder! Bless you, dear sister!

Dianna Mendez on July 26, 2016:

My dear Ms. Dora, I first want to express my sympathy over the loss of such a wonderful mother. Secondly, you have written what we must all remember when we face these moments. It is not an ending but a beginning. Live your life to the fullest each day, as God intended. Thank you for sharing from your personal window of life.

Frank Atanacio from Shelton on July 26, 2016:

Ms Dora, its the truth when I say my heart melts, sensitive and humble hub.. it offers a Godly sense of life's and death's priorities... My condolences.. and may God be with you as always during your missing days..

Natasha from USA on July 26, 2016:

Dear Ms. Dora,

Thank you for this. My own mother died of cancer about two years ago. She knew it, and she was ready for it...but it was still hard for us to see the cancer take her away from us. One of the last things she was able to say to me was, "Am I going to heaven?" That led to a discussion of John 10 and the story of the good shepherd who knows all his sheep. She never worried about that again.

Robert Levine from Brookline, Massachusetts on July 26, 2016:

Hi Dora, very well done. I particularly like the sidebar of quotes about death. By and large, I find secular society seems incapable of dealing with death.

Kiss andTales on July 26, 2016:

As I read your hub I am so overwhelmed of your courage , your strength , and you are actually being strong for many who are going through the same experience but are not able to express the pain as you have.

I expected no less from you ! How wonderful it is to give of youself even when in pain from your heart.

That is what Jesus did, he gave and keeps giving , that is love !

I try my best to totally rely on our Father's words and Jesus because they can relate to death as an enemy.

Example Did the Heavenly Father lose a precious life in death ? Yes his Son who died for us. JESUS

Before that he was always there beside him in everything, a Prince or first born Angel.

Did Jesus lose someone in death ! Yes he lost many faithful humans he knew as and Angel.

But the Bible Records show him weeping when Lazerus died. Even though he held the key to release him from death sleep.

Joh 11:35 Jesus gave way to tears.

Jesus with His Father Jehovah can undo death and return our loves back.

1Co 15:26 And the last enemy, death, is to be brought to nothing.

It was not meant for humans to die !

But Adam and Eve and Satan created the concoction when they severed the life line from the Heavenly Father.

When they did this it was like they lived on their on auto pilot. Until they bodies gave out on its own power not God's

So they bodies auto pilot into death forever.

So all humans are marked to die because of them genetically.

So right there in the garden The Heavenly Father worked a cure for us as innocent bystanders.

But it would take generations for his cure to appear and be administered.

The cure arrived.

But for us to benifit from it we must be educated according to accurate knowledge

not imitations of truth but ginuine.

We must also follow Jesus very close in his steps he shows us how.

And his cure would cover not just one century of humans but many generations of humans. We are now the 21 century

Soon the close of the number allowed will finally end.

Then Jesus will be running earths affairs on a cleaned earth free from opposers.

Then we will be building homes for those asleep in death as they return as written.

Isa 65:22 They will not build for someone else to inhabit, Nor will they plant for others to eat. For the days of my people will be like the days of a tree, And the work of their hands my chosen ones will enjoy to the full.

Isa 33:24 And no resident will say: “I am sick.” The people dwelling in the land will be pardoned for their error.

I share these exciting future times to come with you.

May Jehovah keep you close Ms Dora !

Thank you !

Scribbling Geek from Singapore on July 26, 2016:

Thanks for sharing this personal and moving episode of your life. May your mum rest eternally in the Lord's comfort.

Mary Wickison from Brazil on July 26, 2016:

I am sorry for your loss.

I wasn't able to be with my mother when she passed but my sisters and their children were. I took comfort in knowing many were there to show her the love and compassion which she had given to us, all those years.

The quote you have by Thornton Wilder, "The highest tribute to the dead is not grief but gratitude." is perfect. I think losing someone would be less painful if we celebrated their lives instead of grieving their passing.

This was a beautiful and unique way to share your thoughts during a difficult time.

Dolores Monet from East Coast, United States on July 26, 2016:

Dear MsDora, I am sorry for your loss. We can firmly believe in God and Heaven, we can visualize a beautiful angel coming to fetch our darlings

and we can celebrate a life well lived but that don't make it easy. I hope that your sadness is filled with tenderness and that you remember your mother will always be with you because love never dies.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Well said, Bapak. We seem never to come to terms with Death, but we are all better of anticipating and accepting it.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Patricia, thanks for your kind thoughts. I wouldn't have it any other way than being with my mother in her final days. I agree with you: it is a blessing.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Thanks, Pamela-Mary. I do have many reasons to thank God for my mother's life. So sweet of you to remind me of that.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Chitrangada, the expereince certainly made me weak, but family support helped. Thanks for your understanding and expressions of compassion.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 26, 2016:

Jodah, I wish my mother was conscious enough to say good-bye. You're blessed to have that opportunity with your parents. Thank you for your kind sentiments.

Christopher Watson from Ohio on July 26, 2016:

It is difficult to accept death in this society because it is unfamiliar. In spite of the fact that it happens all the time, we never see it. Saying Goodbye to a Loved One!!!

Patricia Scott from North Central Florida on July 26, 2016:

O Ms. Dora...how blessed you were to be with her in the final days and hours...and how blessed you are to have a Momma that you loved so and that no doubt left a lasting impact on your life.

Your observations about death are spot on. The

'using time wisely' is one we strive to do each and every day....one day at a time sweet Jesus.

Well done sharing

Angels are once again on the way to you ps

Peg Cole from Northeast of Dallas, Texas on July 26, 2016:

Beautifully written, MsDora. Remembering lost loved ones in this way is truly comforting. I understand the depth of your feelings on this, and that our faith is meant to carry us through this time of loss.

Pamela Mary from Leesburg, Virgina 20175, USA on July 25, 2016:

Hello, @MsDora when I read your memoires article that's time I am I thinking human life diversity as a your mother matter, I think she should be pass good time, just don’t forget prayer to god for your mother life.

Chitrangada Sharan from New Delhi, India on July 25, 2016:

I am so sorry to learn about your loss. May your mother Rest in Peace!

It needs so much courage to write this tribute about the final moments spent with your respected mother.

I might say that I am a strong woman ready to face any challenge but losing someone you love the most and that too your parents makes me feel scared.

I am sure many will draw strength from this beautifully written hub of yours.

I agree with your last paragraph that death sometimes unites close relations like nothing else can.

And as you say we must make the best use of the time available to us.

Thanks for sharing and God bless you and your family!

John Hansen from Queensland Australia on July 25, 2016:

Please accept my deepest condolences MsDora. It is always a difficult time to accept our loved one's passing even if it is God's will. I clearly remember my mother and father's passing. They both had full faculties right until the end and that made it all the more difficult to deal with. At least I could say goodbye, but I am still saddened by the memories. This is a lovely tribute and it was good to have family around to share the burden and support each other I am sure.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 25, 2016:

Marlene, I understand and accept your sentiments. Thanks for your prayer.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 25, 2016:

Whonu, your point of acceptance is very true. It is useless to get bitter, and become miserable. Thanks for your feedback.

Marlene Bertrand from USA on July 25, 2016:

I am so sorry to hear of your mother passing. Your tribute is absolutely beautiful. I hope I don't sound heartless if I say thank you for sharing your experience, as a dear friend of mine passed away a few days ago and your words are very comforting. I pray that the Lord keeps you strong in knowing your mother is with Him right now as it shall be the same with all of us who love Him dearly.

whonunuwho from United States on July 25, 2016:

If all of us could accept death as you have just shown, I believe that we all would be comforted and more realize our humanity. Thank you for sharing in this my friend. whonu

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 25, 2016:

Thanks, Bill. Yes, my mother is better off. I have to believe that.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 25, 2016:

Glynch, thanks for elaborating. Now I understand (still slow at processing). Yes, we do need to pay attention to our unbelieving relatives. Life is all about preparation for the heavenly reunion, and it would be selfish of us not to be intentionally be concerned about their salvation. Reminders like yours are relevant and timely. I appreciate you.

Bill Holland from Olympia, WA on July 25, 2016:

This is really a very beautiful sharing, Dora. I offer my sympathies, as I understand very well your emotions, but I am also happy for your mother. I have to believe she is smiling today.

blessings always

glynch1 on July 25, 2016:

When my mother passes away (she's 89), and if she still does not know the Lord in salvation, that will indeed be a day of deep grief for me. My father died over four years ago, and as far as I know, he did not know the Lord either. Both very religious all their lives, they nevertheless did not show the instincts of the true believer. My siblings, cousins, aunts and uncles also do not know the Lord as their Savior. They cannot share in the same kind of grief that I will feel on that day.

Still, I commend you for writing a nice message of comfort to those whose parents know Christ as Savior.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 25, 2016:

Lori, thanks for those comforting verses you shared, also for the prayers and the hugs. I appreciate you.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 25, 2016:

Thanks Sally. You may have guessed that it was my mother's situation: her two-week hospitalization and the following deterioration in her condition that kept me away from HP. Then came Death. It means so much to me that you thought about me.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 25, 2016:

Glynch, what about those situations? I believe that my readers, like myself, would appreciate you sharing your perspective, so please feel free to do so.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 25, 2016:

Denise, thanks for your feedback. I probably could not write this the day after. This is written from hindsight when the fog has begun to clear. Best to you and your father, going forward.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 25, 2016:

Thanks Flourish. I appreciate your kind sentiments.

Dora Weithers (author) from The Caribbean on July 25, 2016:

Thank you, Word. I may seem stronger than I really am, but I'm improving. Thanks for your encouragement.