Coffee, Decision, and Prayer
A side story to contextualize my deep realizations.
I've never been used to drinking coffee. Not that I hate it, but taking one cup of it eventually leads my body to uncomfortable restlessness and difficult breathing. Well, I remember one experience when I, without thinking of possible negative effects of being caffeinated, joined my workmate in a bad decision - we decided to prepare one pitcher of coffee and shared shots of it, as if we were enjoying bottles of beer, while doing our paperworks. To cut the story short, the next day, I was sent to our school clinic to rest instead of attending my classes that whole day. Sadly, the caffeine in my body didn't do me well.
Unfortunately, just this afternoon, I had no idea what came into my mind and I decided to try preparing a unique cup of coffee. Maybe it's because I wanted to join the fad which I've been seeing in social media recently.
It was somehow a failed attempt, yet I liked the taste. To cut the story short, after an hour or two, I unexpectedly struggled in breathing. My palms and toes were cold and sweaty. My father told me that I suddenly went to being pale in color. My sister quickly gave me a glass of water. My mother scolded me for she clearly knew the cause.
That's when I told myself, "here I go again." A not so good decision that led me to being too anxious and afraid of what might happen next. I've never been used to drinking coffee because I am very well aware of how the caffeine will not do me well after hours. Yet, I did it again.
While I was still struggling with my breathing, with my parents and sister aiding me with stuff that would make me feel better, I thought of praying for myself. I kept on mumbling, "Lord, please heal me now. I believe that You will not let me suffer from this situation and that You will heal me now." The conflict went on for hours, same as with my utterance of a personal prayer.
I was so afraid and regretful of the sudden event. I was actually overthinking about things that might happen if the situation worsened. But while I was being overwhelmed by fear yet continued praying silently, I also felt another significant emotion. Yes, it started with an uncontrollable fear. But gradually, that fear was taken over by a great relief.
It hit me. The transition from being afraid to being relieved, with a sincere prayer in between, made me realize two things. First, how you decide on something affects the entire situation in which it is applied. Second, prayer always works - certainly during bad situations.
First realization: Life encourages us to be always careful of our decisions and the way we make them. It is either we make good decisions or we create awful ones. If we plan on doing a specific action mindfully and wholeheartedly, the result will obviously be good and positive. But, if we decide on doing something without a careful thought or with impulsiveness, I bet the result will be awful and negative.
So, don't be like me who impulsively took an action and regreted doing it afterwards. Bad decisions lead to bad situations!
Second realization: Life encourages us to be always prayerful - may our situation be good or bad. It is either we give thanks for experiencing something that's wonderful or we ask for guidance and forgiveness. If we get to receive a precious gift in any form, that gift will for sure inspire us to be grateful. On the other hand, if we see ourselves being stuck in a down time, that time will for sure push us to kneel down, share our down time, and ask for what we direly need to surpass.
So, try doing the same thing I did when I felt that fear was starting to consume me. The time I whispered my prayer, I started to feel that relief overpowering my fear. Prayer works. It really does!
Thanks to that cup of coffee. It figuratively walked me down to the deep part of my consciousness and let me meet such realizations about decision and prayer.